MY ADVICE TO YOU: NEVER AGREE TO ROOM WITH SOMEONE WHO:

---ADMITS OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE CONSUMES TOBACCO PRODUCTS. ANYONE THAT SELF-DESTRUCTIVE IS VERY INAPPROPRIATE AS A PROSPECTIVE ROOMMATE FOR YOURSELF.

---ADMITS OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE IS A "RECOVERING ALCOHOLIC" OR "FORMER ALCOHOLIC" OR "RECOVERING DRUG ADDICT" OR "FORMER DRUG ADDICT," OR WHO INDICATES OR ADMITS THAT HE "OCCASIONALLY CONSUMES A MARIJUANA BROWNIE". THE RISK OF A "RECOVERING" ADDICT HAVING A RELAPSE, IF YOU ROOM WITH HIM, IS ALARMINGLY HIGH; AND IF HE ADMITS THAT HE "OCCASIONALLY CONSUMES" A MARIJUANA BROWNIE, HE MIGHT AS WELL HAVE CONFESSED TO YOU THAT "I WILL COMMIT A CRIME, BUT ONLY ONCE PER MONTH, WHILE ROOMING WITH YOU". BEWARE OF ANY PROSPECTIVE ROOMMATE WHO ADMITS THAT HE DOES ANYTHING THAT COULD PUT HIM IN JAIL. ALSO, THE ODDS ARE HIGH THAT HE CONSUMES A MARIJUANA BROWNIE MORE OFTEN THAN ONCE PER MONTH, AND HE IS CHECKING TO SEE WHAT YOUR REACTION WILL BE WHEN YOU LATER FIND OUT WHILE ROOMING WITH HIM THAT HE ACTUALLY CONSUMES A MARIJUANA BROWNIE AND GETS HIGH FROM IT ONCE OR TWICE PER WEEK. ALSO KEEP IN MIND THAT IF YOU ROOM WITH THIS CONFESSED MARIJUANA-BROWNIE CONSUMER, THE CURRENT SUPPLIER OF MARIJUANA BROWNIES OR MARIJUANA TO HIMSELF MIGHT BE MAKING VISITS TO YOUR APARTMENT UNIT IN ORDER TO SELL MORE SUPPLIES OF THAT ITEM TO YOUR ROOMMATE. AND THAT DIRECTLY LINKS YOU TO ILLICIT-DRUG TRAFFICKING INSIDE YOUR OWN APARTMENT UNIT---MAKING YOU AN ALLEGED POSSIBLE ACCESSORY TO CRIMINAL ACTIVITIES. FOR THAT MATTER, THE VERY PRESENCE OF ANY CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE INSIDE YOUR AND YOUR PROSPECTIVE ROOMMATE'S APARTMENT UNIT---EVEN IF THOSE ILLICIT DRUGS ARE ALL PROPERTY OF YOUR ROOMMATE---COULD PUT BOTH OF YOU AT RISK OF BEING ARRESTED AND CHARGED WITH A CRIME.

---ADMITS OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE CURRENTLY CONSUMES MARIJUANA, OR THAT HE IS VERY ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT MARIJUANA.

---ADMITS OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE SUPPORTS LEGALIZATION OF EITHER MARIJUANA OR MEDICAL MARIJUANA.

---ADMITS OR INDICATES THAT HE HAS CONSUMED ANY QUANTITY OF MARIJUANA OR ANY OTHER ILLICIT DRUG ON ANY OCCASION IN THE MOST RECENT TWO-YEAR PERIOD.

----ADMITS OR INDICATES THAT HE IS A HEAVY DRINKER OR MODERATE DRINKER, OR THAT HE PARTICIPATES IN OCCASIONAL EPISODES OF DELIBERATELY AND KNOWINGLY SEEKING TO "GET DRUNK".

---ADMITS OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE PATRONIZES BARS OR NIGHTCLUBS ON A FREQUENT BASIS, AND THAT IF YOU ROOM WITH HIM, HE WILL BE BRINGING LOTS OF COMPLETE STRANGERS INTO HIS AND YOUR APARTMENT UNIT WHOM HE HAS "PICKED UP" IN THOSE BARS OR NIGHTCLUBS.

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE LIKES TO "LIVE DANGEROUSLY", SUCH AS BY EXCEEDING THE SPEED LIMIT IN HIS DRIVING PRACTICES AS A MOTORIST ON THE ROADWAY, OR BY PURSUING PERSONS WHO HAVE ALREADY PERMANENTLY REJECTED HIMSELF FROM THEIR OWN LIFE.

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT "ALL OF LIFE IS A GAMBLE," AND THAT HE HIMSELF IS ADDICTED TO SPENDING LOTS OF MONEY ON GAMBLING EVERY MONTH.

---HIDES BEHIND FACIAL HAIR, SO MUCH SO THAT HIS FACIAL EXPRESSION IS OBSCURED AND NONE OF HIS SMILES ARE FULL SMILES.

---HAS LOTS OF BANGS COVERING HIS FOREHEAD AND EYES, SO MUCH SO THAT YOU CANNOT SEE HIS EYES MUCH OF THE TIME WHEN YOU ARE TALKING WITH HIM IN PERSON.

---DECLINES TO SHOW YOU A REPORT FROM THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION PROVIDING YOU WITH ALL OF HIS CRIMINAL CONVICTION RECORDS, IF ANY.

----ADMITS OR INDICATES THAT HE HAS A FELONY CRIMINAL-CONVICTION RECORD.

----ADMITS OR INDICATES THAT HE COMMITTED A MISDEMEANOR CRIME INVOLVING THE ILLEGAL INFLICTION OF PHYSICAL VIOLENCE ON ANOTHER PERSON.

---ADMITS OR INDICATES THAT HE PRACTICES PHYSICAL BEATING OR WHIPPING OF HIS SEX PARTNERS, OR THAT HE PERMITS HIS SEX PARTNERS TO PHYSICALLY BEAT OR WHIP HIMSELF OR TO INSERT THEIR FIST INTO HIS ANUS, OR TO OTHERWISE PHYSICALLY TORTURE OR SEXUALLY TORTURE HIMSELF IN TERMS THAT YOU YOURSELF WOULD REGARD AS BEING PHYSICAL OR SEXUAL TORTURE.

---LIES TO YOU ABOUT HIS OWN AGE.

----REFUSES TO TELL YOU WHERE HE WAS BORN.

----STATES TO YOU THAT "MY IDEAL ROOMMATE IS A GHOST".

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE DOES NOT LIKE OTHER HUMAN BEINGS, AND THAT HE CHOOSES TO "LIVE THE LIFE OF A LONER".

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE EITHER NEVER OR ALMOST NEVER VERBALIZES ANY WORDS OF PRAISE ABOUT ANY OF HIS CURRENT ACQUAINTANCES OR RELIGIOUS ASSOCIATES OR NEIGHBORS OR COWORKERS OR WORK SUPERVISORS OR RELATIVES.

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE HAS NO PERSONAL FRIENDS, AND THAT HE DOES NOT KEEP UP WITH ANY OF HIS RELATIVES.

----STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE GENERALLY WATCHES MORE THAN FOUR HOURS OF TELEVISION PROGRAMS EVERY NIGHT.

----STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE DOES NOT HAVE ANY HOBBIES OR PASTIMES OTHER THAN WATCHING TELEVISION INSIDE HIS RENTAL APARTMENT UNIT OR HOME.

----STATES TO YOU THAT HE WOULD NEVER EVEN CONSIDER EVER BECOMING A PROSPECTIVE FRIEND OF ANYONE WHOM HE ROOMS WITH, AND WHO DOES NOT AGREE TO EVER TREAT HIS ROOMMATE "LIKE A FRIEND" WHILE ROOMING WITH HIM.

---STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE HIMSELF IS AN ATHEIST, ATHEISTS BEING NOTORIOUS FOR THEIR LACK OF TOLERANCE TOWARD THE FREEDOM OF RELIGION LEGAL RIGHTS AND HUMAN RIGHTS OF RELIGIOUS PERSONS WHO ARE NOT THEMSELVES ATHEISTIC.

----STATES OR INDICATES TO YOU THAT HE REGARDS ANYONE WHO IS NON-CHRISTIAN AS BEING "MENTALLY ILL" OR "DELUSIONAL".