Wednesday, March 15, 2017

THE LATEST FROM THE IMAGINARY EAVESDROPPING SCENE IN NEW YORK:



---"To me, Donald Trump is showing a lack of true imagination. He should be citing the types of creative and innovative new and emerging industries in the United States that he particularly seeks to help foster. If he were truly a great President, he would be raving about solar power's potential. But I don't recall him ever giving an 'I love Solar Power!' speech".


--"My friend Paul is doing a linguistic study of Donald Trump's tweets and speeches, to identify the total number of times Trump makes an 'I hate' statement versus the total number of 'I love' statements he makes. During the Trump Era, America is doomed to failure if the number of 'I hate' statements by Trump outnumbers his 'I love' statements by a margin of 20 to one. He needs to get enrolled in a 'Power of Positive Thinking' tutorial that will help him to change his stats in that very crucial category."

---"Donald Trump's refusal to sign the Global Warming treaty could cost the American economy billions of dollars in lost profits. Foreign countries are so alienated by the U.S. Government's intransigence on that issue that they might reduce or sever trade ties with the USA."

---"I wish I had a nickel for every time Donald Trump declares someone to be overrated. I would be a billionaire at this point. Meryl Streep was recently cited by Trump as overrated, and she is one of hundreds who got that cold-shoulder treatment from Trump. It seems only fair to ask whether Donald is himself over-rated as our nation's chief of state?"

--"The biggest surprise is that there is not a 'Pence for President' movement going on, with its focus on obtaining the impeachable-offense legal evidence that's needed for Pence to get promoted to President."


---"If Pence does get promoted to President after Donald gets impeached, it will be a bit like Brutus stabbing Caesar. 'Et tu, Brute?' may well be Trump's last-ever words to Pence before Trump falls to the ground from being back-stabbed."

---"No one has told me yet whether Donald has changed the design on the White House stationery. He probably did, but no one has texted me about it. My friend Sally is guessing that Trump's redesign of White House stationery features a huge profile image of Trump, followed by the slogan 'Welcome to the White is Right House', along with its phone number.



"Did you hear that Trump recently said he does not enjoy watching Hollywood movies? It never occurred to him that every time he talks that way, he is harming yet another American industry. And that does cost our economy lots of jobs, by increasing the unemployment rate for Hollywood actors, producers, and directors. Trump's followers are so fanatical that they are boycotting the movies in honor of our new President."

---"I still can't decide what to call the fanatical followers of Donald Trump. Are they 'Trump's Terrorists' or 'Terror of Trump Brigade', or are they 'Divine-Right Donaldists', in which case they pray to Donald 10 times per day to prove their loyalty to him?"

---"To me, President Trump is a classic case of 'You get what you pay for'. You pay zero dollars in salary money to our new head of state, and in return you get a 0 percent success rate on his job performance."

---"I would love to find out whether the gambling industry in the United States is expanding rapidly now that Trump is president. To me, that is a sign that something is very wrong with our country---that our chief of state openly promotes gambling addictions that inflict personal bankruptcies on millions of Americans!"

---"Every time I walk past a Trump Towers building these days, I expect to hear 'Hail to the Chief' being played in the background. This is one tangible way in which Trump in the White House has changed my life. I'm just grateful that the brass band I am hearing when I walk past Trump Towers is purely imaginary. I hope that doesn't mean that Trump is driving me batty!"

--"I think everyone is worried that if we have a mentally ill president, this will spawn mental illness in millions of Americans who otherwise would have been classified as mentally healthy. Donald's Neuroses have turned into America's Neuroses, and we are all a lot insaner for that metamorphosis he's inflicted on our country."






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