(1) I will NEVER enter your own bedroom or your own bathroom.
(2) You will NEVER sense that I am "high" on or "consuming" any illicit drugs or alcohol. I am a permanent abstainer from both.
(3) I am NOT a "recovering addict", so there is ZERO percent chance that I would ever consume ANY quantity of marijuana, marijuana brownies, or any other illicit drug anywhere and everywhere I am situated or travel to, on a 24-hour-a-day-and-year-round-and-multi-year basis.
(4) I am NOT a "recovering alcoholic" or "former alcoholic," so there is ZERO percent chance that I would ever consume any quantity of any drinking alcohol anywhere and everywhere I am situated or travel to, on a 24-hour-a-day-and-year-round-and-multi-year basis.
(5) I will always use clean language (no profanity by me, no obscenities by me) in my everyday conversations with you.
(6) I have a very high aptitude for platonic (non-sexual) relationships with anyone and everyone, regardless of whether I regard that person as actually being physically attractive.
(7) I have ZERO tattoos anywhere on my own body, and I take pride in being ONE person who would NEVER spend any portion of my own paychecks on getting "tattooed".
(8) I NEVER spend any portion of my own paychecks on gambling.
(9) I have not spent more than $1 of my own money on the Texas Lottery, or any other lottery, at any time in the most recent 10-year period.
(10) I do NOT have any criminal-conviction record.
(11) I am NOT a "fugitive from justice".
(12) I have NEVER used a fraudulent "full name" for identifying myself to others.
(13) I WAS certified at a medical clinic earlier this year as being HIV-negative and STD-free.
(14) I have NEVER consumed any quantity of tobacco on any occasion in my entire life.
(15) I am NOT seeking to convert anyone to my own religion. My religion is NOT proselytizing, and is NOT a cult. My religion IS a fully-independent and one-member, factually-minded "Honor Society" religion in which I am the only approved member, and I almost never directly refer to it in my everyday conversations with others.
(16) I am NOT a censorious person who would ever attempt to inflict physical pain on another person based on his or her having personal beliefs or prejudices or outlooks or religious ideologies or political beliefs that differ from my own.
(17) I do NOT support or advocate or sponsor or finance the infliction of any "thought-control project" or any "deprogramming" project on myself or any other individual.
(17a) I strongly support the legal and human right of any person to be a member of a law-abiding religious group OTHER than my own one-member (myself only) and fully independent non-Christian religion.
(18) I do NOT support or sponsor or endorse sex-change operations involving the surgical removal of a male sex organ from my own or any other male person's body.
(18a) I DO oppose deliberately sadomasochistic torture and deliberately injurious sadomasochistic physical abuse of any human being or animal.
(19) I do NOT inflict continuous noise pollution on a roommate of mine or anyone else.
(20) I am almost NEVER faulted by another human being for being "dishonest," in his or her statedly sincere opinion or belief.
(20a) I DO support full and year-round access to fully reliable and honest news and information services for myself and any other human being on this planet.
(21) I am NOT stalking anyone, and I FULLY honor the legal and human right of any individual to reject me and exclude me from their own life, with the understanding that I of course also enjoy the same legal right to myself then lawfully and in a civil manner exclude the rejector of myself from my own life on a permanent basis as well.
(22) I am NOT withholding from the Austin Police Department or any other law-enforcement agency with possible jurisdiction any factual evidence I myself am ever privy to at any time of myself or any other person being an apparent or possible victim of a felony crime.
(23) I do NOT lay a hand on anyone with impropriety or incivility.
(24) I AM one law-abiding Austin gentleman who would welcome any and all lie-detector tests that any government agency might ever ask me to take at any time. I would very definitely pass a lie-detector test with ease.
(25) I have NEVER stated to a roommate of mine, or to the Austin Police Department, that I was very sure that roommate of mine was "lying" when he himself stated to APD that he was being victimized by an alleged suspected illegal intruder inside his own bedroom of our locked apartment unit (this scenario I cited was hypothetical; I need to add for clarification on 9-6-16 that no roommate of mine has ever stated to APD at any time that he himself was victimized inside his own room by any alleged possible intruder).
(26) I would NEVER refuse ANY request by the Austin Police Department or any other law-enforcement agency for DNA-swab testing on any portion of my own body. Since I am law-abiding and strongly support law-enforcement, I would of course welcome any opportunity to share that type of factual medical information which might be helpful to a law-enforcement agency in any criminal investigation that it might be conducting or seeking to pursue at any time.
(27) I myself DO NOT support the infliction of "medical services" on myself or any other human being that I know for a fact to be medically injurious to that person. I strongly support the legal right and human right of any human being to enjoy a full and fully natural and creatively vital medical longevity on this planet---regardless of whether his or her own "prejudices" or "beliefs" or "stated antipathies" or "values" or "perceptions" are very different from and incompatible with my own.
(28) I myself am NOT "suicide-prone" or "suicidal," and in fact I hope to enjoy a full and fully natural biological longevity for myself in which I am able to write a book at age 100, for instance, if at all possible
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