Advantages to Celibacy When You are Single

(1) You are far less likely to contract any sexually transmitted disease.

(2) It's very unlikely that you'll ever infect anyone with any sexually transmitted disease.

(3) You save a lot of money from not having to purchase any condoms or other contraceptives.

(4) You can devote more time to your platonic personal relationships, including personal friendships.

(5) You don't have to worry about either getting pregnant or getting someone else pregnant.

(6) You won't have to pay for or get an abortion.

(7) You won't have to worry about all of the very difficult parenting issues you would have faced inside your home had you given birth to or fathered a child out of wedlock.

(8) You won't have to worry about how to meet the monumental financial expense of raising a biological offspring of yours that you otherwise might have given birth to or fathered out of wedlock.

(9) You won't have to pay for or undergo a vasectomy.

(10) You save money from not having to take a pregnancy test or pay for someone else's pregnancy test.

(11) You get helpful preparation for life as a monk or priest or nun.

(12) You won't have to share your bed with a complete stranger.

(13) You save money by not having to purchase a new toothbrush for a one-night-stand guest in your apartment.

(14) You won't have to worry about what to say to a complete stranger during breakfast inside your apartment.

(15) You save money by not having to treat a "hot date" to a meal.

(16) You have more time available for petting or hugging or kissing your pet dog or cat.

(17) You are more likely to be praised by others as "wholesome".

(18) You are less likely to be accused of alleged sexual harassment in a context involving physical contact from yourself.

(19) You are less likely to ever be accused of having allegedly committed the sex crime of rape.

(20) You are less likely to get labeled as a "Playboy" or "Playgirl" or "Playboy Bunny."

(21) You could help lead a Celibate Rights Movement.

(22) You are less likely to get invited by a man to watch a porno movie with himself.

(23) You are less likely to hear someone tell you that he or she likes your body.

(24) You are less likely to be repulsed by the genitalia or sex organs of another person. What you never have to look at cannot possibly offend you.

(25) You have more options on what to do with your hands.

(26) Through your masturbation fantasies, the physical attractiveness of your imaginary romantic partners can be significantly greater than your real-life options would have been.

(27) You have no need to take a morning-after pill.

(28) You can enjoy having fewer conversations with others that refer to sex or sexuality topics.

(29) You are less likely to be asked if you yourself are a "prostitute", "hooker", "gigolo," "pimp," or "an illicit john".

(30) You are less likely to be called a "whore" or a "slut" by other persons.

(31) You have no need to ask anyone which type of music they prefer to listen to while doing it with you in bed.

(32) You have no need to ask anyone what their favorite romantic "turn-ons" are.

(33) You are less likely to trigger a rejection of yourself in your personal life.

(34) You won't have to hear anyone telling you how you "performed" in bed.

(35) You have fewer reasons for crying.

(36) You have more free time available for reading.

(37) You won't be accused by a friend of canceling your dinner engagement in order to go out on a romantic date with someone else.

(38) You have fewer reasons for asking yourself why you had gone "all the way" with a cited individual.

(39) You have fewer reasons for asking yourself why you had failed to say "no" to a cited individual.

(40) You have fewer occasions for listening to someone criticize your personal tastes in underwear fashion.

(41) You have fewer reasons to ask yourself whether you had experienced actual intimacy with another human being, or, instead, merely the faking of intimacy, the night before.

(42) You have fewer reasons in the bedroom for faking a moaning sound or exclaiming "Thank you!" with faked ecstasy in your tone of voice.

(43) You have fewer occasions for wondering whether a person you're getting together with during your leisuretime is planning to reject you.

(44) You have fewer occasions for contemplating marriage with anyone.

(45) You have no need to consult an attorney about what common-law marriage consists of.

(46) You save money from not having to worry about paying for any wedding expenses.

(47) You have fewer reasons for asking another person, "Did I score a perfect 10 with you tonight?"

(48) You have fewer reasons for asking another person, "So tell me, how would you rate your most recent orgasm with me on a scale of 1 to 10?"

(49) When you wake up in the morning, you won't have to ask a complete stranger inside your apartment to please tell you again what their first name is.

(50) You are less likely to hear anyone tell you why they think you are "very sexy" or "sexy."

(51) You are less likely to hear anyone tell you what the "sexiest" feature of your body is.

(52) You are less likely to hear anyone in your personal life tell you that you need to brush your teeth more effectively.

(53) You are less likely to hear anyone in your personal life ask you to rinse your mouth with mouthwash ASAP.

(54) You are less likely to cause your bed to collapse from strenuous activity on that bed or the combined weights of two human bodies pursuing bedroom ballet together.

(55) You have fewer reasons for asking a new acquaintance if you could glance at their driver's license in order to verify their legal name and date of birth.

(56) You have fewer reasons to subtract from the current calendar year the year of birth of a younger person you would have considered dating, and then through additional thinking about the month and day of the month of that younger person's birthdate, determine for yourself whether that prospective dating partner of yours meets the state-mandated minimum legal age requirement for yourself.

(57) You have no need to spend any money on romantic dating services.

(58) You have more occasions for comparing yourself to the famous "Virgin Queen," Queen Elizabeth I of The United Kingdom.

(59) You have more occasions for identifying with a musical instrument of the Elizabethan Era----"The Virginal", as it was called.

(60) You have fewer occasions in which you'll be asked the questions "Is this your first time?" or "Were you a virgin before we did it together tonight?"

(61) You are far less likely to contract AIDS.

(62) You are far less likely to die from AIDS.

(63) You have fewer reasons for visiting the red-light districts of Copenhagen, Denmark; Amsterdam, The Netherlands; and Tokyo, Japan.

(64) You save lots of money by not making any payments of money to sexual prostitutes.

(65) You are less likely to be subjected to blackmail relating to your personal life.

(66) You are less likely to be secretly videotaped by anyone else, there being nothing for them to videotape.

(67) You are less likely to read about yourself in the graffiti scrawled on the wall inside public restrooms.

(68) You are less likely to get invited to a sex orgy.

(69) You are less likely to attend a sex orgy.

(70) You are less likely to go financially bankrupt from spending too much money on a romantic partner of yours.

(71) You are less likely while lying in bed to wonder why it is taking him longer than you had expected.

(72) You are less likely to fault another person for failing to use a lubricant.

(73) You save money from not purchasing a Black Book for yourself.

(74) You do not have to worry about whether it might appear hypocritical of you to wear white when you get married someday.

(75) No one will ever accuse you of betraying your fiancee, since you won't be having any
pre-marital sex with another woman.

(76) You are less likely to be asked by friends of yours for "how-to" advice on recommended sexual techniques to use in the bedroom.

(77) No one will ever accuse you of having "knocked up" any young lady.

(78) You are not at risk of being forced into a shotgun wedding, since you did not impregnate any woman out of wedlock.

(79) You have less to confess to your clergyman.

(80) You have no need to ever write to "Playboy" magazine and seek written advice.

(81) You are far less likely to see a surprise "You Tube" Internet image of yourself naked and having sex with someone.

(82) You will receive words of praise for your "remarkable self-discipline. Myself, I couldn't endure five straight weeks of celibacy, much less five days of it," as an admiring single adult gentlemen friend of yours may comment to you.

(83) You are more likely to be perceived as being capable of sexual monogamy. "Since he can go without any sex for this many months, it's obvious he could endure having only one total sex partner if he ever agrees to be in a monogamous sexual relationship with another person."

(84) Fewer people will accuse you of professing to love anyone whom you don't, in fact, love.

(85) You will never have to hire a divorce attorney, since there is no one to divorce: You are still single.

(86) You will never have to decide which food to offer guests at a hypothetical wedding reception on your and your planned spouse's behalf.

(87) You will never have to decide which clergyman should preside over your wedding, since weddings are for those who pursue a non-celibate or post-celibate life together.

(88) You will never need to worry that the person you are having intimate relations with in bed may actually be a spy for a foreign government.

(89) You don't have to purchase a greeting card on St. Valentine's Day, since there is no current romantic partner in your own life.

(90) You can avoid having to explain to anyone that "I never would have had sex with that individual if it weren't for the alcohol that I drank that night. Had I been sober, I would have easily resisted that person's charms."

(91) You are less likely to hear profane or obscene speech on a frequent basis.

(92) You won't be at risk of ever being charged in a court of law with having infected another human being with a permanently injurious or potentially fatal sexually transmitted disease such as AIDS.

(93) You won't have to figure out who might have infected you with a sexually transmitted disease: your celibacy protects your disease-free status.

(94) You won't ever need to ask anyone who else they have had sex with in recent weeks.

(95) You won't have to worry about any case of impotence or frigidity occurring in your bedroom.

(96) You won't have to remind anyone that you yourself are not into S&M or sadomasochism.

(97) You won't have to say 'no' in response to someone in your bedroom asking you if you happen to have a whip, chain, or rope available.

(98) You won't have to face any comment from an overnight guest of yours who insists that "I like to smoke a joint of marijuana before I do it. Do you have any marijuana on you?"

(99) You won't ever be asked by anyone in your bedroom whether you have any Viagra pills available, with that individual adding that "I've run out of mine."

(100) You won't have to worry about any older person suddenly collapsing from a heart attack while in bed with you in your own bedroom.

(101) You don't have to worry about any law-enforcement agency arresting you on the charge that you had allegedly failed to make child-support payments for children you had fathered that were born out of wedlock.

(102) You are spared from any scenario of your ever having any carnal relations or co-mingling of human flesh with any person whom you are physically repulsed by or otherwise repulsed by or alienated from.

(103) You are spared from having to decide which romantic-love poem to read aloud to a hypothetical sex partner of yours in your personal life.

(104) You are spared from being victimized by an unethical, sadistic, and law-breaking Sugar Daddy figure who might otherwise have attempted to take advantage of your own financial weakness by seeking to compel you to have carnal relations with himself.

(105) You are all the more appreciative of the great wisdom behind the Freedom of Association clause of the Bill of Rights. The corollary to that clause is a "Freedom of Non-Association" in regard to individuals whom you have rejected from your own personal life, this corollary having been helpfully confirmed in a recent prior year by at least one first-rate private attorney member of the Austin-based State Bar of Texas state agency of the State Government of Texas.

(106) You are spared from asking your travel agent to please include several of the most romantic vacation destinations for lovebirds when he plans your itinerary for your next leisuretime vacation.

(107) You experience gratitude from noting that the U.S. Constitution and American legal system fully honor and fully protect your own legal right, should you choose to exercise that right, to remain celibate throughout the remaining five or so decades of your own life.

(108) You don't have to worry about any hypothetical scenario in your personal life involving coitus interruptus, since there would be virtually nothing going on inside your bedroom---other than your period of nocturnal slumber in your bed----that could possibly be interrupted.

(109) You will have fewer reasons to hear about or talk about Cupid, the Roman god of desire and erotic love who shot arrows into human hearts that inflamed mortals with romantic desire toward a fellow mortal.

(110) You will be more aware of which persons, on an in-person basis, are the very finest and most enjoyable conversation partners for you in regard to non-sexual topics.

(111) You won't have to worry about which first name and which middle name to give to a hypothetical child born out of wedlock that you might have otherwise fathered or given birth to.

(112) You won't have to hire a baby-sitter or day-care center to take care of any child born out of wedlock whom you might otherwise have fathered or given birth to.

(113) You won't have to continually explain to acquaintances of yours why you are the only legal guardian of the child accompanying you on that outing, since you are not married to the other biological parent of that child.

(114) There is no chance that you will forget to buy a birthday present for a child born out of wedlock that you might have otherwise fathered or given birth to.

(115) You won't have to buy any diapers for any infant child born out of wedlock that you might have otherwise fathered or given birth to.

(116) You won't lose any sleep from having to get up in the middle of the night to take care of a crying baby that you might have otherwise fathered or given birth do out of wedlock.


(117) You significantly reduce your risk of contracting cervical cancer or anal cancer that otherwise might have resulted from your having indiscriminate sex with a wide variety of sex partners.

(118) Your risk of an unfavorable afterlife, according to your own religious beliefs as a Christian person whose Christian religion opposes premarital sex, is significantly reduced.

(119) You are more likely to get discovered by a Hollywood movie director as someone who could convincingly portray a lifelong celibate Roman Catholic priest or a lifelong celibate Roman Catholic nun in a Hollywood movie.

(120) You significantly reduce the risk that the complete stranger you just invited into your apartment a few hours after you met him or her in an alcoholic bar or alcoholic nightclub, is himself a violent person who'll point a gun at you and threaten to kill you.

(121) You are spared from the humiliation of learning that the person you'd picked up from a nightclub or bar and promptly had sex with after they assured you that they were single, was, in fact, a married man or married woman.

(122) You are spared from the humiliation of learning that the man you just had sex with is, in fact, a law-breaking pimp who will now ruthlessly attempt to force you into an illicit career as a sexual prostitute under his control.

(123) You are spared from the emotional duress you might otherwise have suffered from learning that the complete stranger you agreed to have sex with after you had just met that individual for the first time ever inside a bar or nightclub, is, in fact, a freelance journalist writing an expose for a foreign magazine about how deplorably easy it is these days to pick up single Americans and have quickie sex with them, "since Americans of today are shockingly promiscuous and immoral," as that cover story featuring photographs of yourself and other citedly promiscuous single Americans might explain.

(124) You are spared from a humiliating scenario in which you are informed that the individual you just had sex with for the first time in your life was, in fact, a minor employed as an undercover agent for a law-enforcement agency. In that hypothetical scenario, the minor employed as an undercover agent had falsely claimed to you that that individual is a legal-status adult. Your cited failure to ask that individual if you could check their date of birth on their driver's license is one of the primary allegations against you to be cited in a court of law in which you are formally accused of a pederastic sex crime, in that hypothetical scenario you are spared from ever being subjected to.

(125) You are encouraged to develop a profound sense of philosophy that does not focus on philosophy of the bedroom.

(126) You are less likely to be asked by an invited guest inside your home whether you have any "sex toys" or whips to offer that guest of yours.

(127) You are less likely to be asked by an invited guest inside your home whether you like to be tied up after getting naked with that individual?

(128) You are less likely to be asked by another human being whether you would "like to become a sex slave" of that individual?

(129) You are less likely to be asked by a visitor inside your home whether you have any musk cologne in the medicine cabinet of your apartment, since "musk cologne is a favorite aphrodisiac of mine, and I have a very difficult time doing it in the bedroom without the powerful scent of musk," as that visitor might otherwise have put it.

(130) You are less likely to be asked by another person to cite your favorite aphrodisiac.

(131) You are less likely to be asked in bed by an anonymous sex partner of yours if you will be willing to pose for a photograph of you that your sex partner wishes to take while you're still in the nude, "since my photo album exclusively features each of my hundreds of sexual conquests," as that person might boast to yourself seconds after he had sex with you. "I take pride in being a 21st Century Casanova."

(132) You are less likely to be asked by a male sex partner of yours if you would like to know what his secret is for having maintained his erection for as many consecutive minutes as he just did inside your bedroom.

(133) You are less likely to be asked by a male sex partner of yours if you would like to know what his secret is for phenomenal sexual prowess in the bedroom, which he feels very sure that he just demonstrated to yourself that night.

(134) You are less likely to be asked by your male sex partner to tell him exactly how many times you achieved an orgasm during your most recent adventure in the bedroom with him, "since I'm very sure you did it multiply with very big numbers," as he might proudly point out to yourself.

(135) You save a lot of money, and a lot of trips to a laundrymat, from not having to wash the sheets and blankets to your bed more than once per week.

(136) You are spared from being told by a complete stranger inside your apartment that you remind that individual of a porno movie star whom he or she has admired quite a bit.

(137) You are spared from being told by a naked stranger inside your apartment that he is a recruiter for a porno movie-making company, and that he had just had sex with you primarily to find out whether you have what it takes to succeed as a porno movie star.

(138) You can successfully thwart any stalker seeking to force you to room with that individual or have sex with that individual, since the U.S. Constitution and American legal system make it very clear that you as a single adult person are NOT required to have sex with anyone or room with anyone in particular, regardless of what the stalker's own "wishes" or "desires" or "fantasies about you" might be.

(139) You are more likely to visit a Roman Catholic monastery in order to learn more about celibate lifestyle options for single adult persons such as yourself.

(140) You are more likely to admire Roman Catholic monks, since it strikes you as likely that those priests living in complete isolation are, in fact, true to their celibacy vow.

(141) You are more likely to pursue a career as a researcher on celibate lifestyles, with yourself possibly pursuing an oral history project in which you interview thousands of long-term celibate adult Americans about what prompted them to choose that lifestyle option for themselves, and what their lives and values are like.

(142) You are more likely to write a best-selling and fully illustrated non-fiction book profiling "Famous Virgins of World History" or "Famous Long-Term Celibate Adult Persons of World History," depending on which of the two book titles would appeal the most to the book publishers you send inquiry letters to.

(143) You are more likely to write a best-selling book deploring the misconception by millions of Americans that long-term adult celibacy in this country is "proof that the long-term celibate is mentally ill and paranoid."

(144) You are more aware than ever of the high percentage of all other single adult Americans who would not have passed a "sobriety test," as you might put it, with yourself defining a "sobriety test" as "asking myself whether I would have actually wanted to get naked and have sexual intercourse with that adult person if each of us were completely sober at the time."

(145) You are more likely to ask yourself whether a person you just met "might make a good candidate for friendship with me" and less likely to ask yourself whether the individual you just met in person "might make a good candidate for sex-partner status with me."

(146) You are less likely to play strip poker with anyone.

(147) You are less likely to risk violating the law by telling a woman that if she agrees to have sex with you, you will hire her for a position of employment she's recently applied for, or you will arrange for her to get a screen test she seeks with a Hollywood director.

(148) You are more likely to write a best-selling non-fiction book with the title, "Virginity and Celibacy in the American Cinema."

(149) You are more likely to leave behind a generous amount of money in your last will and testament toward the establishment of an "American Long-Term Celibacy Research Institute".

(150) You are less likely to be sternly informed by another person that if you had instead lived in Puritan New England during the 17th Century, you would have definitely been branded with the scarlet letter "A" on your chest.

(151) You are less likely to be informed by a male adult stranger inside your bedroom that "after getting a closer look at you tonight as we copulated together in bed, I have to withdraw my previous comment that you'd make a fine centerfold for 'Playboy' magazine. I can see now that the alcohol in my bloodstream exaggerated some of the physical traits I praised you for inside that nightclub."

(152) You are at less risk of being insulted by a complete stranger inside your bedroom who suddenly declares to you that "I cannot understand why you rate so high in the breast department, but you rate so low in the vagina and derriere department. To be in bed with you is like experiencing the very best and the very worst that a lady can offer a man."

(153) You are at less risk of anyone saying to you, "If you were one-tenth as good at conversation as you are in the boudoir, I might consider dating you again. But it's obvious your conversational skills are so weak that I cannot possibly in good conscience continue dating you."

(154) You are at less risk of anyone saying to you, "That sexual climax you just experienced will be your final one with me. I don't believe in having sex with the same person more than once. It would cramp my style."

(155) You are less likely to be told by a complete stranger inside his home, "I lied to you about my career. I'm actually a Sex Trafficking Specialist by occupation, and you are my latest kidnapping victim. Later this week, you'll be a sex slave in a brothel somewhere in eastern Europe. I'll be giving you a mandatory crash course in that foreign language in the meantime."

(156) You are less likely to be asked by a complete stranger inside his private residence, "So tell me, how many positions do you do in the bedroom? I prefer dating those who can do it 100 ways in the bedroom."

(157) You are less likely to regard every phrase and term and word of the English language as a Freudian slip laced with juicy sexual innuendo.

(158) You are less likely to be accused by another person of only knowing bathroom humor.

(159) You won't feel compelled to explain to a complete stranger in your home that "I'm a lot less sexually active than you think I am. The only reason I said 'yes' to you tonight is because
I felt sorry for you inside that nightclub where we met. No one else was responding favorably to you, and that didn't seem fair to you."

(160) You are spared from your most recent sex partner suddenly informing you just after having sex with you that "I forgot to tell you that I have herpes. I'm sorry that it slipped my mind. I guess I was so intoxicated by your beauty during our date tonight that I forgot to tell you about my herpes. I will make it up to you, though, by paying for your first bottle of medication you'll need to temporarily remove the herpes lesions from your body."

(161) You are spared from being told by a complete stranger inside a hotel room, "I've got some good news and some bad news for you, honey. The good news is that I'm HIV-negative. The bad news is that I'm herpes-positive. I would have told you about it if you had asked me. Look at it this way. You still can enjoy a full medical longevity, despite the date we had tonight."

(162) You are spared from being abruptly informed by a male college student inside that individual's hotel room, "Honey, I meant to tell you that my background in football taught me a lot about the value of gang tackling. I hope you don't mind, honey, if several of my former varsity-squad teammates join us tonight inside this hotel room for a fun gang-tackle. It's not going to be gang rape, as long as you say 'yes' to us. And I promise you that you'll be doing lots of multiple orgasms tonight, so you'll be in constant ecstasy all night long. In fact, you might even reach infinity in your ecstasy level, with all the multiplying you'll be doing tonight in bed."

(163) You are spared from hearing "well-intended" personal guidance from acquaintances of yours that "as long as you can't see your sex partner in the dark, you should never be repulsed by that individual. In the dark, even the ugliest or most unsightly person can come across as pleasant, since you enjoy the freedom to yourself imagine that individual as someone else altogether, an individual found in your own favorable-fantasy life who IS, in fact, attractive to and appetizing to yourself."

(164) You have achieved full protection against any risk of any person born more than 12 months before yourself ever attempting to have carnal relations or sexual relations with you in any context at any time, or even seeking to compel you to room with anyone more than 12 months older than yourself in age. That freedom from older persons in your personal life in either of those two contexts can be a source of very great and wonderful relief.

(165) You have more occasions for re-reading American writer James Thurber's 1929 book, "Is Sex Necessary?", in order to yourself politely concur with the author that sex is not, in fact, necessary.

(166) You can save money by choosing not to purchase or read Alex Comfort's famous book, "The Joy of Sex."

(167) You have more incentive to write a best-selling book with the title, "History of Spinsters in the United States."

(168) You have no need to ever write a best-selling book with the title, "101 Ways to Achieve an Orgasm."

(169) You will develop a keener appreciation for the asexual or non-sexual or non-romantic definitions and connotations and sounds of words and terms such as "climax", "erection", "virgin olive oil", "come", "seamen," "titular," "blow," "date," "lover," "lubricant", "partner", "jam", "cherry", "wet", "hot", "heat", ""virgin forest", "wool", "lady killer", "screw", "affair", "eruption", "flood", "hole", "thing", "toy", "slave", "hard", "stiffen", "gymnastics", "thrust", "enter", "bottom", "top", "open", "receptive", "dominant", "passive", "lay", "stripped", "crotch", "trick", "neck", "loose", "doing it", "encounter", "discreet", "tongue", "frigid", "potency", "aids", "flesh", "eager", "beaver", "shot the bird", "wad", "weapon", "tool", "valley", "unzip", "zipper", "quickie", "bang", "oral", and "penetrate."

(170) Your eventual estate after you die is less likely to be subjected to numerous lawsuits in which numerous persons---including dozens of former dating partners of yours and former spouses and former roommates or housemates of yours in your personal life---each demand to be paid a sizable amount of money or given property from your estate, based on their claim in probate court that they had each been "sexually intimate" with you during your lifetime for a specific period of time ranging from one minute in duration to 30 total combined minutes of duration, or even longer in total combined minutes of duration.

(171) You are less likely to be suspected by others of having allegedly committed the crime or possible crime of pederasty or extortionism or bribery or blackmail or attempted enslavement of a human being, or intergenerational exploitation of younger persons, when you are generous toward, and express keen enthusiasm and appreciation for, several or many of the younger persons whom you like or admire or love.

(172) You can pursue other forms of vigorous exercise that provide you with better cardiovascular stimulation and strengthen a greater variety of muscles on your body than participating in the sex act per se would have accomplished for you.

(173) You won't be as likely to hear your life described by others as featuring a triangle of any type.

(174) You will have fewer occasions for pondering romantic-love triangles in your own life whenever you fly near Bermuda, and the famous Bermuda Triangle, on a commercial airline flight.

(175) You are more likely to write to the Mayor of Dallas, Texas, and politely request that an existing street in Dallas be re-named "Just Friends Lane", thereby serving visitors to Dallas and current Dallas residents who don't feel comfortable with the world-famous "Lovers Lane" in that north Texas city.

(176) You are less likely to be accused by anyone of yourself falsely stating that you are suffering from a headache, with the accuser in that scenario adding that you obviously did not want to have sex with that individual at that particular time and that the "headache complaint" was merely a pretext for your lack of sexual desire toward that individual.

(177) You are less likely to hear anyone ask you which of the vitamin or mineral supplements that you ingest on a daily basis account for your "legendary success in the bedroom."

(178) You are less likely to ever hear anyone pose the accusatory-sounding question to you, "Aren't you too old to be having sex, during this period of your life? Why can't you be like the many senior citizens who limit their exercise to going back and forth on a rocking chair?"

(179) You are less likely to ever hear anyone say to you, "You are a lot better looking when you're fully attired. Have you thought of retiring from any further pursuits in the nude, during this period of your life when you primarily elicit winces from anyone having to look at you in that condition?"

(180) You have fewer reasons for telling dirty jokes to anyone, and you also have fewer reasons for listening to dirty jokes from anyone else.

(181) You have more incentive for reading books profiling great non-sexual or strictly-platonic personal relationships of world history, including the famous personal friendship in the 1950s and 1960s between Former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt and Illinois Governor Adlai Stevenson.

(182) You are more likely to lead an Involuntary Huggers' Rights Movement that protects the legal right of individuals NOT wishing to be embraced or hugged or kissed by another person in any context, to enjoy full freedom from an involuntary embrace, an involuntary hug, or an involuntary kiss, regardless of whether any such embrace, hug, or kiss would have occurred with both individuals being fully clothed at the time. Your Involuntary Huggers' Rights Movement could file lawsuits and seek financial compensation on behalf of individuals who were infected with herpes of the lip when a herpes sufferer kissed them without obtaining their prior permission for that kiss.

(183) You are more likely to enhance your personal appreciation for the virgin Greek Goddess Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, while lowering your personal estimation of the Greek Goddess Aphrodite, the Greek Goddess of Romantic Love.

(184) You will have fewer occasions for having to figure out how to remove a brassiere from a woman's body.

(185) You are less likely inside the bedroom to ever hear another person accuse you of secretly fantasizing about someone else who is not present in that bedroom.

(186) You have less of a need to worry that "Playboy" magazine or "Playgirl" magazine will ever make a phone call to you and request the opportunity to interview you about your activities in the bedroom.

(187) You are far less likely to get into a "lovers' quarrel" with another human being.

(188) You are far less likely to jump from a cliff and leave behind a suicide note expressing your grief over having been rejected by another person.

(189) You are less likely to lose sleep over trying to figure out why another person in your life has been aloof or cruel toward you in recent days.

(190) You can hone your skills at politely saying "no" to individuals you don't wish to date who are seeking to go on a romantic date with you.

(191) You are more likely to notice physical attributes of other persons that are situated above their waistline.

(192) You have additional incentive to anthologize a collection of Platonic Love poems and then serve as the editor of that proposed new best-selling book.

(193) You develop greater appreciation for philosophers---Kant, for instance---who emphasize the crucial importance of mutually-beneficial platonic relationships in life.

(194) You are more likely to write a first-rate and wholesome book for children that becomes a best-seller.

(195) You are less likely to be distracted by the adult person sitting on the passenger side of you motor vehicle when you give that individual a ride somewhere.

(196) You are more likely to celebrate International Friendship Day in August of each year.

(197) You have more occasions for getting to know the various tea blends--ginger green tea, for instance---and for having a conversation with another person over a cup of hot tea.

(198) You have more free time available for learning and honing your skills in a variety of lifelong sports, tennis and roller skating and racquetball among them, that can help to sustain you throughout your life.

(199) You are more likely to serve as the editor of a new recipe book that exclusively contains favorite culinary recipes of noteworthy or famous long-time celibate persons (the widowed First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt, for instance; or various nuns and monks and priests who fully honored their celibacy vow) who ate each of the featured dishes with particular delight during a period of long-term celibacy for themselves.

(200) You are far less likely to be suspected of the crime of homicide, since any possibility of intense romantic jealousy by yourself toward any other human being can be ruled out from the start.

(201) You are more likely to earn a significant amount of financial compensation after you successfully prove in a court of law, with help from a private attorney of your choosing, that a ruthless stalker of yourself who repeatedly meddled in your own life, had subjected you to unwanted and involuntary sexual celibacy against your wishes over a multi-month or multi-year or multi-decade period of your own life.