My Advice to Youths and Teens: Do Oral History Interview of Each of Your Parents

One of the finest "presents" you can ever give yourself, and your family, is to each year conduct an oral-history interview of each of your parents.

You can then keep those oral-history tapes on a lifelong basis, which will serve as a fine inspiration to you and your descendants throughout their lives.

Among the many questions that a child or teenage person of today might want to consider posing in a respectful manner to your mother or father for a 2009 Family Oral History Tape, are:

---"What do you believe was the most difficult challenge or crisis that you ever directly experienced in your own life so far? How did you respond to that challenge or crisis?"

---"Which important decisions have you made in your own life that you now believe have had the biggest long-term effect on your own living conditions, quality of life, or life circumstances?"

---"We often hear about the turning point in a football game, for instance---the play on the football field that many observers believe to have largely determined the outcome of the game. In your own life so far, what would you identify as your most noteworthy 'turning point' or 'turning points'?"

---"Please tell me about what you regard as having been a bad habit of yours, such as nail-biting or gambling or smoking cigarettes or swearing, that you managed to overcome or at least partly overcome. How did you manage to discontinue or at least partly overcome what you now regard as a bad habit on your part?"

---"If you could live your entire life over again, what would you have done differently?"

---"During your youth or teenage years or college years, which careers or jobs did you hope to eventually pursue or have? Did you change your mind in regard to any of those expected future careers or jobs for yourself?"

---"What do you currently regard as your greatest creative accomplishment from your entire life so far?"

---"Which personal attributes of yours, or skills or talents or hobbies or pastimes of yours, do you feel the proudest of?"

---"If you were to someday win a nationwide award, in which category or for which accomplishment of yours would you most want to win that award?"

---"Which careers or vocations did you pursue in a prior year that you don't currently pursue? For instance, did you bag groceries inside a supermarket during your high school or college years?"

---"If you could describe what you would regard as being your ideal or best-possible career and your best-possible living circumstances or living conditions, what would they be like?"

---"Would you be willing to show me your current resume or vita? As an offspring of yours, I would love to learn more about you and your career-related accomplishments."

---"If you were to compile and then bury a time capsule about your own life that you'd be willing to share with Americans of the 22nd Century, for instance, what would you put in that time capsule"?

----"We often think of human beings' lives in terms of the rituals and traditions of theirs to which they were devoted for many years of their life. If you were being interviewed by someone who you agreed at that time to write a biography about you, what would you cite as your most noteworthy rituals and traditions from your entire life so far? Please describe each of those rituals and traditions of yours."

---"Which individual or individuals whom you have met in person were the most inspirational to you? What made that person or those individuals inspirational to you?"

---"Which teachers of yours or college professors of yours did you admire the most and like the most as human beings?"

---"Of all the persons whom you have become acquainted with in a strictly-platonic context, which persons have inspired in you the most consistently appreciative and relaxed and natural and spontaneous smiles toward themselves on your part?"

---"Of all the persons who have offered you criticism of yourself so far in your life, which individuals offered you constructive criticism that has helped you the most? Please elaborate."

---"Would you please describe to me some of the persons not related to you with whom you have had an inter-generational personal friendship? I am referring to a personal friend of yours who was either significantly older in age than yourself or significantly younger in age than yourself. Which of your inter-generational personal friends have you admired the most, enjoyed the most, or loved the most?"


---"When you have felt yourself to be at your most confident in a context not directly involving yourself and your current mutual-consent spouse, do you recall the context in which you felt that admirable high level of confidence in yourself?"

--"When you evaluate other human beings, which personal attributes are particularly important to you?"

---"Of the many individuals whom you have met so far in your life, which one person do you believe was the most honest and conscientious and kind and benevolent toward yourself? Was that individual your own biological mother, for instance?"

---"We often look upon true friends as persons who help to increase our own freedoms and opportunities and options in life. From that standpoint, which individuals do you believe have been your truest personal friends?"

---"Of the many fine compliments and words of praise for yourself that you have received so far in your life, which compliments or words of praise have inspired you the most and have been of the greatest practical benefit to you? Do you recall who offered you that praise, and the context in which that individual complimented you in that very memorable way?"

---"Of the various persons who were never a romantic partner or dating partner or spouse of yours, which individual have you praised the most frequently and the most consistently in your life so far?"

---"Have you written any letters of recommendation for anyone so far in your career or overall life? For which individuals did you write letters of recommendation?"

---"Of the many people you have met in your life so far, which one individual has been the most generous in offering you an abundance of sincere and thoughtful and insightful words of praise for yourself, whether in a personal context or in a career-related context?"

---"What are your most cherished memories about your mother and father? Did your mother insist on lending you her only scarf during a snowstorm in Iowa, for instance? Did your mother establish a very generous children's education fund benefiting each of her Iowan offspring? Did your Iowa-farmer father declare one day while traveling through the Sierra Nevada mountains of California with you, that "These mountains would be much more productive and useful as farmland, if only there were a way to level these mountains through a government-approved project by the Army Corps of Engineers," or words to that effect. Did your anti-alcohol father launch into colorful and endearing tirades denouncing all Iowans who consume beer or alcohol?"

---"Of all the advice that your own mother or father ever gave you, which advice do you now believe was the wisest?"

--"Of all the youths not related to you whom you have become acquainted with in your life, which youth have you personally admired the most and liked or loved the most? Have you ever considered introducing any of your own children to the youth whom you admired the most?"

---"Do you have any lifelong personal friends, or individuals who have been personal friends of yours in a mutual-consent context ever since your youth? Of those lifelong personal friends, which individuals do you currently admire and like the most?"

---"What have been the various nicknames for yourself that other persons have dubbed you or informally assigned to you so far in your life? Did you like and feel comfortable with each of those nicknames? Did you dislike any of those nicknames? If you disliked any of those nicknames for yourself that someone else assigned you, did you ask anyone to please refrain from addressing you or referring to you by that nickname?"

---"What do you regard as being essential elements in a lasting strictly-mutual-consent personal friendship?"

---"Of the famous people whom you have not yet met, which individual or individuals do you admire and like or love the most? Would you like to receive an autographed photograph of that famous person, and possibly post that photograph of that smiling individual on the wall inside your home?"

---"Of all the famous or widely-admired persons whom you have actually become acquainted with in person, which person or persons did you personally believe to be either unworthy of their fame or unworthy of their fine reputation?"

--"Of the various foreign nations of the world, which foreign country would you most like to visit?"

---"When you reflect on each of your own nations of ancestry from your own life, whether that be Great Britain and Germany or some other combinations of foreign nations, do you recall when you feel proudest to have ancestry from each of those respective foreign nations? Do you recall when you feel the least pleased about having ancestry from each or both of those respective foreign nations?"

---"If you ever had the opportunity to apply for a citizenship in a second nation as well, which foreign nation would you choose for your second citizenship? Would that foreign nation be New Zealand, Australia, Great Britain, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, The Netherlands, France, Belgium, Germany, Switzerland, Spain, Italy, Greece, Ireland, Canada, or some other foreign nation?"

--"What do you like the best about The United States of America and American society in the year 2009? What do you like the least about the USA and American society in the year 2009?"

---"If you could change one aspect of American society in the 21st Century, what would you change?"

---"If you could be President of the United States of America for a day, what would be your first official action as our nation's Chief of State? Would you ask the United States Congress to approve a new law imposing strict penalties on anonymous verbalized communications violating the privacy rights of Americans in this country?"

---"Of all the political leaders whom you have directly observed or read about or heard about so far in your life, which political leaders have impressed you the most and inspired you the most?"


--"Not including the U.S. state where you are currently residing, which U.S. state is your favorite? What makes that other U.S. state a favorite of yours?"

--"Of all the cities or towns in the entire world that you have visited without residing there, which city or town is your favorite?"

--"In which cities or towns or nations that you have visited while traveling did you find the residents of that city or town or nation to be the friendliest and warmest and nicest toward yourself?"

---"How important has your own ethnic or racial heritage been for you in your own life?"

--"Of all the scenic routes highlighting natural scenery that you have traveled on or along, which scenic route by railroad or roadway delighted you the most? Which county or rural area or metro area in the United States where you have traveled has or had the finest or most glorious scenery?"

---"Of all the nature parks you have visited so far in your life, which national parks, state parks, county parks, or municipal parks have been your all-time favorites?"

---"What has your own relationship been to the very important political and societal and religious causes of environmental protection and natural resource conservation and energy conservation throughout the entire United States?"

---"Would you like to see American society become more frugal and more spartan and more idealistic, so to speak, which would also imply a rejection of the excesses we often associate with rampant materialism in this country."

---"What would you say either have been in the past, or currently are, your leading platonic passions in life, whether that be playing tennis or kneading and baking homemade bread or something else."

---"If someone were to ask you, 'What are your favorite things or animals?', how would you respond to that question? Would you cite gardenias or jasmine plants, for instance? Would you cite freshly baked and homemade multi-grain bread? Would you cite Bobwhite quail or miniature French poodles, for that matter?"

---"Which hobbies or pastimes have you enjoyed pursuing in your life so far, whether that be in your youth or during your adult years?"

---"Is there any hobby or pastime you have not pursued much, if at all, so far in your life, but that you would like to learn? For instance, would you like to learn how to play or pursue badminton or bridge or crossword puzzles?"

--"Which other skills for everyday living would you like to have, but have not yet mastered?"

---"Which philanthropic cause or civic group in which you were a member or invited guest or participant at the time, gave you the greatest and most sublime pleasure so far in your life?"

---"Do you agree with the German philosopher Nietzsche, and I am note quoting him directly on this, that a romantic personal marriage is like a long conversation, and that it is wise for a single person to select a marriage partner who makes for an enjoyable and fulfilling in-person conversational companionship."

---"Do you agree with the writer Joan Didion that if a husband and wife have a compatible sense of humor, this greatly enhances the chances of their marriage being successful. Do you and your spouse laugh at the same things?"

---"Of all the Wedding Anniversaries each year that you and your mutual-consent spouse have celebrated together so far, which wedding anniversary has been your most enjoyable and heartfelt?"

---"Do you remember your happiest or most joyous birthday of your entire life so far? What happened during that birthday celebration in your honor?"

---"Do you remember the happiest day of your entire life so far? Please describe that day to me, and what made that day so very, very special and joyous for you."

---"Which day of the year is your birthday? In which city or town were you born, and do you recall the name of the hospital where you were born? Do you recall the name of the physician in charge of delivering you in the hospital?"

---"What do you believe have been your most sublimely enjoyable 'peak experiences' of your life so far that occurred in a strictly-platonic, non-romantic context for you?"

---"Which subjects or topics do you particularly enjoy discussing in person with myself?"

---"Of all the restaurants where you have dined, which one or two restaurants are your all-time personal favorites?"

---"Which book or movie or theater play that you have read or watched or attended in person inspired you and delighted you the most?"

---"Which culturally-enriching outings have you most enjoyed pursuing with one or more of your children at any time during your life so far. For instance, was there a musical live-theater performance that you particularly enjoyed attending with your children and spouse? Was there an outdoor concert that you felt thrilled by when you attended that outdoor concert with one or more of your children, and possibly your spouse as well. Was there a family outing to an art museum or historical museum or other cultural site that, for you, was a favorite cultural-enrichment experience for you?"

---"Of all the Hollywood actors or actresses you know about, which actor or actress most reminds you of yourself? Which of those Hollywood actors or actresses do you like or love or admire the most?"

---"If your own life story were ever the inspiration for a novel or semi-fictionalized movie or theater play, what do you believe the title of that work of fiction should be?"

---"Which fictional writers or non-fiction writers or journalists have been your all-time favorites?"

---"What are your favorite aphorisms or wise sayings that guide you in your own life?"

---"What have been the live cultural events or live sporting events you attended in person that emotionally inspired you the most? Was that the finals of a professional tennis tournament, a symposium about how to achieve lasting world peace through world government, or some other live public event you attended in person?"

---"What have you learned in 2009 about your own life or about your own living conditions or quality of life ---or about anything else, for that matter ---- that you don't believe you ever realized or were ever informed about before this year?"

---"Do you recall the day or month or year when you believed you experienced the greatest joy or happiness of your entire life as of that time? Please describe that day or month or year."

---"What would you say are your leading pet peeves as a human being? For instance, does it upset you a lot when other motorists fail to signal before they change lanes on the roadway?"

---"Which conduct or accomplishment by any of your offspring makes you the happiest or brings you the most joy or pride as a parent these days?"

----"As a parent, when are you aware of feeling the happiest?"

---"In which ways have your becoming a parent and your being a parent transformed your own values and beliefs and lifestyle conduct?"

----"Of all the characters on television and in the movies who have portrayed a parent in a fictional show or fictional movie, which actors through their performances as parents have inspired you the most or impressed you the most?"

---"What do you believe has been the most difficult challenge you have faced as a parent? What do you believe has been the most difficult challenge you have faced as a mutual-consent spouse of another human being in your marriage?"

---"Are there any subjects or topics that you have wanted to discuss with me, but you have decided against discussing that subject or topic with me?"

---"Do you want to be a lifelong personal friend to each of your offspring? Or do you subscribe to the view that a parent's special relationship to an offspring can never be described as a friendship?"

---"In which ways do you as a biological parent of mine regard yourself as being very similar or similar to myself? In which ways do you as a biological parent of mine regard yourself as being very different from myself?"

---"As a parent, do you feel that each of your offspring have expressed an adequate amount of appreciation and love for yourself? Which types of traditions or conduct would you like to see your children pursue that conveys even greater appreciation and love for yourself?"

---"Which of your own parents do you feel the closest to emotionally, and why? Also, which brother or sister from your immediate family during your childhood do you feel the closest to today?"

----"Are there any stories or anecdotes that one or both of your own parents told you during your childhood, and that you regard today as having been particularly memorable or interesting stories or anecdotes from your own parents?"

---"How important have privacy rights been for you in your own life so far? Can you recall any occasion in which you sensed that some person had possibly violated your privacy rights? How did you react to that situation?"

---"Have you followed any particular guidelines or criteria for excluding persons from your own life whom you regard as being either dishonest or possibly capable of committing a crime? Are there any other types of persons whom you generally or almost always or always exclude from your own life? Please elaborate."

---"Of the various persons you have encountered whom you suspected of being addicted to either drinking alcohol or illicit drugs, are there any individuals whom you chose to exclude from your own life because they were, in fact, alcohol addicts or drug addicts during that period?"

---"Have you ever called 911 to report evidence of possibly illegal conduct that you have directly observed or heard about? What was that experience like for you? Did the factual information or hunch that you provided to a law-enforcement agency play an apparent role in the criminal-law apprehension and subsequent prosecution of anyone?"

---"Could you please name some examples of the types of conduct you regard as being immoral, and of individuals whom you regard as being immoral?"

---"Did you ever seek to befriend an individual whom you believed was being persecuted or stalked or harassed or abused in a context or manner that you regarded as unfair toward that individual? Do you recall how you sought to befriend that individual?"

---"Have you ever chosen to permanently exclude anyone from your own life because you suspected that that individual sought to censor you, or otherwise exhibited a lack of full respect toward your own Constitutionally-assured Freedom of Speech or Freedom of Religion or Freedom of Association legal rights, or your also-Constitutionally-protected privacy rights?"

---"Of the various persons whom you have become acquainted with, which individual or individuals showed the greatest respect and appreciation for your own Freedom of Speech, Freedom of Religion, and Freedom of Association Constitutional legal rights?"

---"Are there any limits to your own tolerance of human diversity in the United States and American society? For instance, are you intolerant toward any form of human diversity that involves illegal conduct? Do you feel intolerant toward the emblazoning of tattoos on human bodies or toward S&M lifestyles involving the physical beating and physical whipping of one or both romantic partners in those so-called romantic relationships?"

---"Have you ever been victimized by fraudulent communications or pranks or criminal mischief that was perpetrated on you or sponsored by or financed by another person? If so, did you file legal charges against that person?"

---"Have you yourself ever felt victimized by prejudice or discrimination in any context? How did you respond to that possible evidence of prejudice or discrimination against yourself?"

---"Do you recall any occasion from your entire life so far in which you felt humiliated in public by another person? Please describe that experience."

---"Have your own views on religion or religious affiliation changed at all in the period since your youth?"

---"Please describe for me the role that your own directly-chosen religious denomination or directly-chosen religious beliefs have had or currently have in your own life."

---"Which cultural or political or religious leaders whom you have observed so far in your life have had the most inspirational and impressive moral vision, in your opinion?"

---"As a parent, do you observe much evidence of inter-generational exploitation of younger persons in the city where you currently reside? Which actions do you pursue as a parent to help prevent inter-generational exploitation of one or more younger persons by an older person---such as an affluent older person who might seek to intimidate and subjugate and exploit a younger person?"

---"Did you ever feel critical of either of your own parents during your youth? Did you ever discuss those critical impressions of yours with either of your parents?"

---"In your own life, have you ever sensed that you were receiving unwanted verbalized communications from anyone that violated your own privacy rights? Did you pursue a strategy for lawfully and in a civil manner terminating those unwanted communications to yourself?"

---"In your own life, have you ever been significantly wronged by another person on any occasion? How did you respond to that?"

---"In your own life, do you feel that you yourself have ever significantly wronged another person on any occasion? Would you be willing to recall for me and describe that incident?"

---"In your own life, have you ever identified any other person as being or having been a 'bully' toward yourself? How did you respond to that cited bully's verbal harassment of yourself and overall abuse of yourself?"

---"In your entire life so far, which individual or individuals have intimidated you the most or scared you or frightened you the most? Please elaborate."

---"In your entire life so far, is there any one person you've directly encountered whom you would identify as having been the most sinister person or the most evil person from your own life? Who was or is that person, and have you filed any criminal-law charges or civil-law charges through a law-enforcement agency or in a court of law against that person?"

--"In your entire life so far, which person or persons do you believe have been the cruelest or most sadistic toward yourself? Please elaborate."

--"Of all the persons who have told lies to you, does any one person stand out as having been or as himself or herself being the most pathological liar who victimized yourself through his or her pervasive and injurious dishonesty?"

---"Have you ever filed a lawsuit or criminal-law charge against anyone or any business entity or any non-profit corporation in a court of law? What was the outcome of any such legal action, if any, that you filed in a court of law?"