HOW TO TURN INTO A SOCIAL PARIAH OR OUTCAST, AND GET OSTRACIZED IN AUSTIN, TEXAS:

---Confess to an Austin resident that you have never consumed cocaine, and that you yourself are appalled by cocaine.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself would like to obtain a reliable estimate on the percentage of all Austin residents age 15 or older who are addicted to marijuana or any other illicit drug.

--State to an Austin resident that you believe that smokers in Austin who are employed should expect to have the total amount of time per workshift that they take on their own initiative for "mini-breaks", deducted from their total number of hours on the job for which they get paid by their employer.

--State to an Austin resident that you believe it is illegal for a person situated at a Capital Metro bus stop in Austin to be consuming beer outdoors on that public property.

--State to an Austin resident that you are appalled by the number of homeless persons in Austin who reportedly drink mouthwash as a way of getting "a buzz" or "getting drunk," when that mouthwash is poisonous and very harmful to their health.

--Confess to an Austin resident that you yourself are VERY uncomfortable with the so-called "High Five" handshake, and that the traditional English handshake is the ONLY type of handshake that you yourself agree to participate in.

--State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT believe it discriminates against younger persons or African-Americans or "hip" persons that you yourself insist on shaking hands with them, when and if that situation ever occurs, using the traditional English handshake.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself cannot feel comfortable about watching football games until such time as the injury rate for players in those games is reduced by at least 50 percent, and that you strongly disagree with President Trump's very irresponsible statement that professional football of today is not aggressive enough, in his opinion.

--State to an Austin resident your emphatic belief that anyone in Austin who consumes or purchases ANY QUANTITY OF ANY ILLICIT DRUG, does in fact by definition have ties to organized crime.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself never visit East Sixth Street in downtown Austin as a paying customer.

--State to an Austin resident that you are dismayed by the many cases of public intoxication and fist-fights that occur every week along East Sixth Street in downtown Austin.

--State to an Austin resident that you regard the pick-up bar scene along East Sixth Street in downtown Austin as a spawning ground for AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, and for unwanted pregnancy.

--State to an Austin resident that you believe that customers inside pick-up bars and nightclubs, along with "bathhouses" where sex occurs inside those "bathhouses", should each be required to pay an AIDS surcharge sales tax in those establishments that help finance AIDS-prevention-education services in Austin public schools, including public universities.

--State to an Austin resident that you are disgusted by how many adult persons in this city refuse to wear any underwear, and insist on themselves "mooning" numerous persons each day, including minors, such as whenever the cited adult persons bend over at their workplace or other public place and reveal their naked behind to anyone having the unpleasant experience of glancing in their direction.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself almost exclusively verbalize the word "sex" in referring to diseases.

--Confess to an Austin resident that you yourself almost never refer to "sex" or "sexual identity" in your own everyday conversations with anyone.

--State to a female Austin resident that you want to know whether her most recent pregnancy was, in fact, a WANTED pregnancy for herself?

--State to a female Austin resident that you would like to know whether she has a personal lifestyle strategy designed to spare her from sustaining an unwanted pregnancy?

--State to a pregnant female Austin resident that you would like to know if she has ever at any time in her entire life ever on any occasion ever once sustained ANY pregnancy she actually wanted to have?

--State to a pregnant Austin woman that you want to know if she is philosophically opposed to herself ever getting pregnant in the context of her being married to the male person who impregnated her?

--State to a pregnant Austin woman that you want to know if she has ever in her entire life ever once experienced the joy of experiencing a pregnancy that she did, in fact, want to have and chose in advance to have?

--State to a pregnant woman or pregnant girl in Austin that you want to know if she is willing to tell you the name of the male person who impregnated her in a non-marital context?

--State to a pregnant woman in Austin that you would like to know if she considers herself to be the "lucky mother"?

--State to a pregnant woman in Austin that you would like to know what she likes the most or loves the most about the "lucky father"?

--State to an Austin resident that you are appalled by continuous anonymous communications, and that you yourself very emphatically refrain from participating in continuous anonymous communications.

--State to an Austin resident that since Austin is reportedly the "live music capital of the world", you want to know the lyrics of his own personal favorite song that was actually written by an Austin-based song-writer at any time in the most recent five-year period?

--Confess to an Austin resident that you have never attended a rock concert in Austin on any occasion in your entire life, and that you value your eardrums too much to ever get exposed to noise pollution of that type.

---State to an Austin resident that you yourself are VERY opposed to the use of continuous noise pollution in Austin as a political or religious "weapon" aimed at punishing or persecuting or harassing a disliked person and also aimed at making him or her "go deaf" and thereby incur a medical disability or become incapacitated.

--State to an Austin resident that you want anyone and everyone, regardless of which subcultures they themselves criticize in a non-anonymous manner, to enjoy the best possible medical health and creatively vital medical longevity or lifespan.

--State to an Austin resident that you are VERY opposed to brainwashing projects aimed at censoring a person for having political and religious and personal beliefs that are unpopular with a cited "community" or a cited "subculture" or a cited person or group of persons.

--Confess to an Austin resident that you do not wear or own any jewelry.

--State to an Austin resident that you do not regard it as "Fascism" or "Nazism" when you yourself report to the Austin Police Department factual evidence you have obtained of illicit drug activities in Austin.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself are very opposed to "railroading" out of town or harassing a person whose political and religious and personal beliefs are repugnant to yourself, and that you revere their Freedom of Speech-protected legal and Constitutional rights.

---State to an Austin resident that the percentage of single adult Anglo drug-addicts in Austin is so high that when they get married someday, you expect them to invite their drug dealer to serve as the "best man" at their wedding ceremony.

--State to an Austin resident that you regard graffiti on public property in Austin as criminal mischief for which the perpetrators should each be arrested and charged with a crime.

--Confess to an Austin resident that you yourself never verbalize profanity or obscenities in your everyday conversations.

--State to an Austin resident that you support the lifestyle practice of taking a shower or bath at least once per day.

--State to an Austin resident that you support the wearing of underarm deodorant by as many adult Austin residents as possible.

--State to an Austin resident that "getting high" is not a favorite mantra of yours.

--State to an Austin resident that you support blowing one's nose in a private or public restroom, rather than while remaining seated at a dining table.

---State to an Austin resident that you are dismayed by how many Austinites regard talking about each of the tattoos emblazoned on their own body as their idea of an interesting conversation topic.

--State to an Austin resident that you yourself do not have any tattoos to show them, since you have no tattoo anywhere on your own body.

--State to an Austin resident that you would like to see any and all tobacco products permanently removed from the shelves of all retail stores throughout Austin.

--Confess to an Austin resident that you are thoroughly repulsed by beards or mustaches or goatees on men, and that you regard facial hair as a public health issue, since facial hair can spread germs.

--State to an Austin resident that the failure of the Austin City Council to hire a permanent new city manager at any time in more than one year indicates to you that a lot of prospective first-rate applicants question the level of integrity and level of honesty of Austin and the local government here.

---State to an Austin resident that you believe that anyone who is HIV-positive should feel fully honorbound to lead a permanently celibate lifestyle in which he refrains from having any intimate physical contact of any type with other human beings.

---State to an Austin resident that you believe that anyone who infects another person with the HIV virus should face criminal charges in a court of law.

--State to an Austin resident that you recommend that anyone who is HIV-positive should consider purchasing a pet dog and hugging that pet dog whenever that HIV-positive person feels a need for physical contact.

---Confess to an Austin resident that you have not consumed any drinking alcohol on any occasion in many years.

 ---State to an Austin resident that you yourself are thoroughly disgusted by the many "hookah" business establishments currently operating in Austin.

---Confess to an Austin resident that you are thoroughly repulsed by tattoos on human bodies.

 ---State to an Austin resident that in the best of all possible worlds, you would love to see all of the dozens of tattoo parlors in Austin closed down permanently.

---Confess to an Austin resident that you are dismayed by nostril rings.

---Confess to an Austin resident that you believe that tongue rings are disgusting.

---State to an Austin resident that you frequently make 911 phone calls to the Austin Police Department in which you report to the police evidence you have obtained of alleged possible felony crimes or suspicious activities.

--State to an Austin resident that you are one Austin resident who WELCOMES any and all interviews or forensic DNA swabs anyplace on your own body or any lie-detector tests or any ongoing 24-hour-a-day electronic surveillance of your own bed inside your rental apartment unit that the Austin Police Department is ever willing to grant you in your self-identified status as a crime victim in Austin.

---State to an Austin resident that you are disgusted by how many Austin residents of today routinely verbalize the "f"-word in everyday conversation.

--State to an Austin resident that you hope that African-Americans in Austin will please refrain from using the "n" word in reference to other African-Americans .

---State to an Austin resident that you are a longtime celibate-by-choice, recently-certified-HIV-negative, single-by-choice gentleman who DOES NOT want to have any physical contact or any sexual-contact with ANYONE.

 ---State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT support legalization of marijuana.

--State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT support legalization of medical marijuana.

--State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT support sex-change operations involving surgical removal of the penis from a male person's body.

--State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT support any form of "weirdness" in Austin that involves illegal or flagrantly illegal conduct.

--State to an Austin resident that you oppose the sadomasochistic physical torture of any human being, such as by physically beating or physically whipping another human being, and that you would be very pleased if all of the self-identified S&M scene pick-up bars of Austin went out of business.

--State to an Austin resident that you are very opposed to the insertion of a human fist into the anus of a human being, and that the S&M community of Austin that pursues this "lifestyle" practice of "fist fornication" or "fist f-cking" (letter "u" omitted for the sake of propriety) is very offensive to you.

--State to an Austin resident  that you emphatically oppose pederasty, and you also strongly oppose intergenerational exploitation of adult persons by persons significantly older than themselves.

 --State to an Austin resident that you DO NOT HAVE any "client" relationship with any drug dealer, and that you most definitely hope that all ALL of the current drug dealers of Austin will get arrested and face criminal charges in a court of law.