QUESTIONS FOR THE QUEEN IN ENGLAND: My Meeting with the Queen of Great Britain & The United Kingdom---Questions I'd Like to Pose to Queen Elizabeth II

Had I been invited by the British Government to visit Great Britain and have a friendly meeting with the Queen, I would have brought with me a list of questions I'd like to pose to Her Majesty.

I would have of course politely emphasized to one of her assistants that Queen Elizabeth was being invited by me to respond to the one or two questions (or, if Her Majesty wishes, additional questions) that strike the Queen as particularly pertinent and incisive and helpful.

I would then submit to Queen Elizabeth's kindly assistant a polite list of questions from myself, inviting the Queen to decide which of those questions Her Majesty would like to respond to during my meeting with Her Majesty:

--Which is your all-time favorite tea blend?

---Which nation of the world grows the very finest tea leaves, from what you have observed?

---Of all the tea gardens in the entire world that you have visited while also possibly sipping tea at that tea garden, which tea garden visit was the most sublimely beautiful experience for you? Which tea garden in the entire world is your all-time favorite?

--Do you mind if I ask you how many cups of tea you yourself drink or sip each day? Do you have a favorite decaffeinated tea that you are enjoy drinking or sipping in the evening?

--Your Majesty, do you find that you are more likely to trust someone who delights in sipping freshly brewed hot tea, as contrasted with someone who drinks coffee but no tea at all. Do you experience a tea-sippers' camaraderie with fellow tea devotees?

---Your Majesty, do you believe that the people of Great Britain can attribute their very impressive record for civility partly to their world-famous daily ritual of attending a polite and congenial High Tea gathering in which they converse with friends or friendly acquaintances. When you review nationwide crime rate statistics for The United Kingdom, which you no doubt do as part of your conscientious role as Head of the Anglican Church and as the reigning Head of State, do you sometimes note to yourself that "the crime rate in our country would have been 20 percent higher, had it not been for the conciliatory and pacifying influence of our great High Tea tradition throughout The United Kingdom"?

---Your Majesty, most Americans look upon members of the Royal Family as being ceremonial civic leaders who devote much of their time to honing their skills and talents at hobbies and sports. Of your own various pastimes and hobbies and sports that you have pursued in your life, which pastimes or hobbies or sports have given you the most pleasure?

---It seems likely that philately is among your fine hobbies. I mention this partly because your benevolent and widely-admired face has appeared on postage stamps issued by numerous countries of the British Commonwealth. In fact, there may well be a Queen Elizabeth II-theme international stamp album that exclusively features 20th and 21st Century postage stamps from countries around the world, including colonies of Great Britain, that feature a sketch or portrait of yourself. Is stamp-collecting among your current hobbies, and if so, what do you particularly enjoy about stamp-collecting?

---Your Majesty, one of the most cherished of American and British leisuretime traditions, the "daily constitutional" involving a leisurely hike, is no longer even identified that way in my country. It seems that 21st Century Americans have abandoned that term, and the majority of Americans apparently do not go on a daily leisuretime hike. In your country, by contrast, is the daily constitutional tradition faring well these days?

---Your Majesty, do you recall any particular daily constitutional from your own life that was particularly enjoyable or sublimely pleasurable to you?

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers are no doubt wondering which season of the year is your favorite for pursuing a hike outdoors? Would that be the summer season, the spring season, the fall season, or the winter season? Also, which season of the year in Great Britain is your overall favorite season?

----Your Majesty, many people regard you as perhaps the most famous female Equestrian in the entire world. Would you be willing to share your recollections about your relationship with the one horse of yours you loved the most? What was that horse's name, and what set that horse apart from all the other horses you have owned or ridden?

---Your Majesty, do you generally recommend horse-riding for other senior citizens, or do you regard equestrianism as perhaps a bit too risky for most persons over age 60?

---Your Majesty, you must be very mindful of yourself being the most famous grandmother in the entire world. In your noble roles as the official Head of State of The United Kingdom and head of the Church of England, have you considered establishing an annual tradition of yourself each year publicly honoring and praising a "British Grandmother of the Year" or a "British Grandfather of the Year" or "British Grandparents of the Year"?
I raise this question partly because 21st Century British senior citizens during their retirement years often have a more extensive involvement in helping to raise their own biological grandchildren or step-grandchildren than British senior citizens did in the late 20th Century. In a modern era when both the father and the mother of any given British child are both pursuing employment away from the home, it seems likely that a grandparent of that child is increasingly involved in providing child-care services to the child.

---Your Majesty, you may have read the widely-quoted observation by the American founder of "Ms." Magazine, Ms. Gloria Steinem, that "the aging process is very intriguing and a source of considerable enjoyment for me," or words to that effect. Do you agree with Ms. Steinem that the aging process in a senior citizen should serve as a basis for delight and fascination?

---Your Majesty, most people assume that senior citizens have fewer personal friends than do middle-aged persons or persons in their 20s, for instance. The general assumption is that senior citizens lose many of their personal friends when those friends pass away, leaving those senior citizens with fewer total friends than during their own middle-aged years. It's also assumed by many that senior citizens tend to be less likely to socialize outside of their private residence during that period of their lives, partly because senior citizens sense that they no longer elicit as much spontaneous delight from new acquaintances based on their offering a pretty or handsome face, for instance. Your Majesty, have you yourself observed an increase or decrease since the 1970s period of your life in the total number of close personal mutual-consent friends of yours whom you either write to or speak with on the telephone or meet with in person at least once per month?

---Your Majesty, do you believe that most senior citizens have a strong emotional need to develop new personal friendships during that period of their life with younger persons, including numerous children as well as numerous teenage youths and numerous adult younger persons?

---Are there any hobbies, pastimes, or sports, or any other skills, for that matter, that you wish you had learned or pursued, but that for whichever reason you chose not to learn or pursue.

--Your Majesty, it must cross your mind on occasion during meetings you have with private citizens, members of Parliament, and others, that everyone who meets with you in person is no doubt seeking to present himself as being commendable, clean-talking, law-abiding, moral, conscientious, and honorable at all times. Are there any occasions in which you have wondered what it would be like to speak with and listen to those same individuals during time periods when they are not seeking to impress you. Or have you developed a Queen's Intuition about each individual who meets with you in person, giving you what you believe to be an intuitive glance at how they would present themselves when speaking freely and candidly and bluntly, even, with personal friends of theirs or relatives of theirs in their own privacy-rights-protected everyday life.

--Which is your all-time favorite pastry or other food item to eat while you are participating in a High Tea?

---It must be a source of considerable frustration for you to read and hear the various American media accounts consistently disparaging the cuisine of Great Britain. Do you believe the British Government and British society could do more to promote creative, healthful innovations in British cookery that would enhance the popularity of British cuisine among Americans and other observers of Great Britain?

---Your Majesty, do you find it dismaying at times to sense that the vast majority of all Americans could not cite any particular pie or cake that they associate with distinctively British cooking. Among the typical responses that your country would receive, if your country conducted a survey of Americans on that subject, might be: "I assume that ale is among the leading ingredients in the most popular British cake. But I admit that I have never seen or tasted an Ale Cake myself. The darker the ale used, the darker the cake, I would expect. And a Darker Ale cake probably has more flavor to it." Other responses from Americans surveyed at random by your country would very likely include, "I have never seen or tasted a Toffee Cake, but English people of all ages obviously love their toffee, so much so that it would be impossible to imagine an English person not eating Toffee Cake at least once per week. The English have toffee cookies, after all, from what I understand, and it's only logical that English people would delight in toffee cake, too." Or: "I just assume that the English take pride in Marmalade Pie, since Marmalade is a favorite food item in England. I would expect that Orange Marmalade Pie would be particularly popular in England. Another possibility would be Oatmeal Cake, which the Scottish people probably make using leftover oatmeal that no one found the appetite for at that particular breakfast." Another likely response: "I myself don't understand how the British people are able to turn Shortbread into a cake or pie, but they probably do, since eating shortbread is a nationwide obsession in Great Britain, from what I understand. I would think it would be very difficult to slice a shortbread pie or cake, though." One more possible response that Americans in that survey would offer is: "I can never remember if it's kidney bean pie or kidney pie that the English are fond of eating. I don't believe they eat it for dessert, though, since it wouldn't be a sweet-tasting pie. As for whether the English use kidney beans or the kidneys of cows or the kidneys of chickens in preparing that pie in the kitchen, it's not something I've ever Googled on the Internet."

----Your Majesty, many Americans look upon Great Britain as a nation synonymous with the word "toffee," so much so that they are surprised that the signs welcoming them to Great Britain do not state, "Welcome to the Great Toffeeland of Europe." Do you, in fact, offer American tourists and tourists from other nations as well the opportunity to receive a guided tour of a Toffee Factory in Great Britain? I ask this question because there must be many Americans who would like to add a tour of a Toffee Factory on their itinerary when they visit England, but who don't know how to pursue that goal.

---Your Majesty, have you ever heard of an American tourist in Great Britain who reportedly asked a native of your country if that tourist from the USA could visit a "Toffee Farm" ("Not a Coffee Farm, but a Toffee Farm," as that tourist might emphasize to his London tour guide) in England in order to observe up close what your country's world-famous toffee beans look like. "I wanted to visit an agricultural farm in your ocuntry that would be very distinctively English, you see," as that American visitor may well have put it to his tour guide in London.

---Your Majesty, would you feel honored and pleased if a Queen Elizabeth II British Culinary Institute promoting healthful innovations in British-style cooking were to be established in the near future. I am referring to an institute that, after extensive research, developed the most healthful and nutritious scone in the entire history of The United Kingdom, for instance.

---Your Majesty, have you yourself ever hoped that some British citizen with expertise at British-style cooking would develop a series of easy-to-follow videotapes entitled, 'The Art of British Cooking', possibly with an emphasis on low-fat, low-cholesterol, vitamin-rich, 21st-Century adaptations of British dishes? I raise this question because, as you are no doubt aware, Americans have been treated to hundreds of television programs highlighting the Art of French Cooking, thanks to the great influence in our country from the famous Francophile Julia Child of Cambridge, Massachusetts, who in the final years of her life reportedly resided in Southern California. It often seems, in any event, as if videotapes and television programs about the Art of British Cooking are far fewer in number in the United States than are videotapes and television programs about French cooking.

---Your Majesty, do you find yourself occasionally envying the French for the global respect for their cuisine that they have commanded? Do you sometimes wish that British cooking were as exalted as French cooking throughout the entire world?Do you occasionally wish, for that matter, that a new hybrid Franco-British cuisine, combining the best of British cooking with the best of French cooking, might be developed?

--Your Majesty, it must be a source of considerable pride to you to sense that many of your country's former colonies have developed culinary dishes that reflect and honor their British heritage. Have you ever considered commissioning or requesting a special new cookbook that exclusively contains intriguing and tasty adaptations of British dishes----including hybrid dishes in India, for instance, that reflect the local indigenous produce of India, while also highlighting English culinary tradition---that many of The United Kingdom's former colonies have concocted?

---I find it intriguing, Your Majesty, that most Americans do not know how the people of Great Britain typically celebrate a victory by their town's professional soccer team. Do you yourself happen to know what a typical English or Scottish or Welsh Victory Meal would consist of, after a favorite soccer team of those British citizens had triumphed earlier that day on the soccer field?

---Your Majesty, if you had the authority to do so, would you like to see a requirement imposed specifying that all prepared or processed foods that contain flour and are on display for sale in British grocery stores must contain unbleached flour, for the sake of protecting your subjects' medical health?

---Your Majesty, when you observe a subject of yours purchasing a scone in a British bakery or coffeehouse that you are completely sure has been made from bleached flour, or flour that HAS been bleached, does this ever elicit a wince of dismay and concern from you?

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers would love to find out which type of scone is your personal favorite. Would that be an orange scone, a lemon scone, or some other flavor of scone? I ask this because many Americans in their imagination tend to assume that any authoritative profile of a British person must at some point mention which type of scone is favored by that British citizen.

---Your Majesty, would you like to see Great Britain follow and expand upon the lead set by New York City, New York, by requiring the complete elimination of all trans fats from any and all dishes and beverages being sold in any of the restaurants of your country and, in addition, the complete elimination of trans fats from all food products or beverages being sold in British grocery stores. I pose this question because it seems likely that an anti-trans-fats British law of that type would each year spare thousands of British citizens from suffering heart attacks, and would save many lives each year in your country.

---Your Majesty, many people evaluate and rate the cuisine of a nation largely in terms of the sauces that accompany that nation's characteristic dishes. This prompts some observers to wonder whether the Hollandaise sauce that we associate with the English-style Eggs Benedict, originated in England or France or possibly even The Netherlands, which is purely a guess on my part relating to the possible root word "Holland" in "Hollandaise." I raise this question, in any event, because the word "Hollandaise" appears to not be English in origin. I guess my basic question is: Your Majesty, are you struck by the irony deriving from the simple fact that your nation's most famous breakfast dish, Eggs Benedict, apparently features a sauce with a distinctively French or distinctively Dutch accent, so to speak.

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very aware that the fictional English character James Bond helped to popularize Eggs Benedict as a breakfast dish all over the world. According to one of the James Bond spy-thriller novels by Ian Fleming, Eggs Benedict was James Bond's favorite breakfast. Do you yourself have the same type of deep affinity for Eggs Benedict that James Bond had? Or do you wish that British Secret Service Special Agent James Bond had promoted some other indigenous British breakfast dish?

---Your Majesty, millions of Americans assume that you British people traditionally enjoy eating marmalade as part of your daily breakfast. Would you be willing to say at this time which type or brand of marmalade is your own personal favorite? Would that be orange marmalade, for instance, or possibly something else, such as apricot marmalade, peach marmalade, lemon marmalade, or strawberry marmalade?

--Have you been pleased or displeased by the long-term trend in the percentage of all British citizens in Northern Ireland, Wales, Scotland, and England who each participate in a High Tea group on a year-round basis.

---Do you know what percentage of all Britons who participate in High Tea groups on a year-round basis are, in fact, women or female youths? How would that percentage compare with 10 years ago, from what you can recall. Do you sense that men and male youths in Great Britain possibly need to be encouraged by the British monarchy to join a High Tea group?

--Have you yourself encouraged Prince William and Prince Harry to join a High Tea group? Do you believe that if Prince William and Prince Harry were publicized in the media as attending a High Tea on a year-round basis, this might help persuade more male youths and adult gentlemen throughout the British Isles and British Commonwealth nations to attend a High Tea on a weekly or daily basis.

--Have you ever considered authorizing the compilation and publication of a new cookbook that features many of your own all-time favorite culinary dishes and beverages?

--Many people have commented on your very impressive medical health and slenderness and admirably erect posture. To what do you attribute your great success in those ways?

---Your Majesty, some American observers of your great European nation have commented to me in recent years in Central Texas that a disproportionately high percentage of all English people have traditionally been hunchbacks, "since traditionally many of the English people were employed as chimney-sweepers. That blue-collar occupation in England was very harmful to many Englishmen's posture." Your Majesty, are you generally impressed by long-term trends in the percentage of all British citizens who do, in fact, have either very fine or fine posture? In your noble role as Chief of State of The United Kingdom and Head of the Anglican Church, are you routinely provided with annual or semiannual reports estimating the percentage of all British citizens of today who are currently classified as hunchbacks?

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers who are senior citizens would appreciate receiving from you any personal advice you might be willing to offer them on criteria they should rely upon for choosing the best possible primary-care medical physician for themselves.

--Your Majesty, when you glance at a fully ambulatory and alert senior citizen in his or her 70s, 80s, or 90s, do you marvel at the beauty of that individual's success at pursuing a life that enabled him or her to achieve creative longevity and a full medical lifespan?

---Your Majesty, are there any particular foods or beverages you've frequently consumed that you have believe have been particularly healthful to you in your own life?

---If you could describe what you would regard as a "Feast Fit for a Queen" or "Queen's Choice" ideal dinnertime meal for yourself in the year 2009, which dishes and beverages would you want to see and enjoy eating at that dream dinner, so to speak?

---Your Majesty, is there any particular dish or beverage that you yourself occasionally or habitually eat or drink, and that reminds you of your beloved grandmother, Queen Victoria, because she was quite fond of that dish or beverage. Do you, in fact, occasionally imagine yourself sharing a meal and conversation with Queen Victoria? If so, what do you imagine yourself to be saying to Queen Victoria in that 'time-tunnel conversation,' so to speak? Would your comment to her be something like, 'How special it must have been for you, to feel confident each day that the Sun Never Sets on Your Empire, since your Empire extends throughout the entire world.'

----Your Majesty, many of your admirers are no doubt curious to learn from you which of the foods or beverages that you regard as being unhealthful, you have abstained from the most diligently and consistently.

--Of the various outdoor hiking trails in Great Britain, which is your favorite?

--Of the various lakeside beaches or oceanside beaches of Great Britain, which is your favorite to visit?

---Your Majesty, do you find yourself wincing on occasion to sense that a natural-scenery-theme survey of all Americans of today would possibly elicit only one cited natural tourist site in your entire country, that site of course being the White Cliffs of Dover. Your Majesty, would you be willing to take this opportunity to respond at this time to the millions of Americans of today who say that "White Cliffs of Dover" are the only noteworthy natural scenic site in your entire nation that they themselves can recall?

---Of all the islands of the world that are governed by or included in The United Kingdom, which is your personal favorite?

---Your Majesty, you must be very mindful of the great prestige and tourist appeal held by numerous islands in the Caribbean---those islands, of course, including Corsica, Crete, Sicily, and possibly even Sardinia. By contrast, it often seems as if none of the islands off the coast of Great Britain hold mass appeal among tourists. Would you support a project to enhance the tourism appeal of the Isle of Man, for instance, or do you regard the dearth of resort islands off the coast of the British isles as posing no major concern for the British Government.

--Your Majesty, do you have a personal all-time favorite place in Great Britain in which to yourself admire either the sunrises or the sunsets outdoors?

--Of the various national nature parks of Great Britain, do you have a sentimental favorite you would like to cite at this time?

---Your Majesty, do you recall any occasion during your reign in which you have taken an official visitor to your country on a trip into the English countryside for a picnic? If so, what was that picnicking experience like for you and your guest?

--Your Majesty, I must confess that I myself do not know what your favorite flower or flowers happen to be. Which flowers are your favorite? Would that be daisies, roses, daffodils, irises, or some other flower?

--Your Majesty, many people must be wondering what your favorite bouquet of flowers happens to be. Would you be willing to please state at this time what your own personal favorite bouquet combination of flowers bunched together?

--The Kew Gardens are world-renowned, of course. Would you like to see Wales and Scotland and Northern Ireland each have an impressive public botanical garden of their own that would also promote keen appreciation for botanical plants on the part of the Welsh, Scottish, and Northern Irish residents of the British Isles?

--Some observers of Great Britain have no doubt commented that Wales and Northern Ireland appear to suffer from a cultural inferiority complex in regard to England and Scotland. Do you agree with that observation, and if so, what do you think can be done to help boost the cultural confidence and cultural vitality of Welsh and Northern Irish Britons?

---Your Majesty, you must be painfully aware that millions of people all over the world have heard, and possibly even themselves verbalized, the traditional observation that "Welsh people tend to be financially stingy." If I remember correctly, I believe that some Americans have traditionally complained that 'He Welshed me by declining to treat me to that dinner,' but I may be mistaken about that recollection of mine from decades ago. Do you regard that widely-held belief about the people of Wales to be unfair, particularly in the year 2009?

----Your Majesty, we have all heard about the so-called "Dutch Treat" tradition of The Netherlands, in which an invited guest is expected to pay his share of the bill when dining out with a friend, and the host who invited the guest to dinner that day merely pays for his own portion of the bill. In which states of Great Britain, in your opinion, are the citizens of that state the most likely to invite someone to a meal in a restaurant and then ask their invited guest to pay his or her own share of the bill? Would that state be Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland, or England?

----Your Majesty, do you feel at all dismayed by low-income persons who wish to share a meal and friendly conversation with a friend in a restaurant, and who frankly confess to their friend before they meet for that meal that they are financially unable to treat their friend to a meal that day, so that it would have to be a "Dutch Treat" outing for each of them. Does it strike you as fair and proper on the part of persons of very limited finances to express their generous hospitality in non-financial terms toward an invited guest, such as through a smile and a handshake and through words of praise for that invited guest?

---Your Majesty, if you were asked which of the four primary geographical areas of Great Britain---whether that be Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland, or England----has the lowest overall devotion to philanthropy, when socioeconomic disparities among those states are taken into account, which state of Great Britain would you cite as holding that dubious distinction? Would that state be Wales, or would it be Northern Ireland---or possibly even Scotland or England?

----Your Majesty, many observers have no doubt commented that the very fascination of Scottish people with the hypothetical existence of a "Loch Ness Monster" presumably inhabiting some Scottish lake, derives from a lack of confidence by the Scottish people in the cultural vitality and rationality and benevolence of their own people. From what I gather, the Scottish people who claim to believe that a Loch Ness Monster dwells in Scotland are not claiming that monster to be benevolent. So it seems that the cited "Loch Ness Monster" has served as a scapegoat for all that ails Scotland---an excessive consumption of ale and an anti-education bias by some Scotsmen no doubt being among the most obvious sources of societal malaise in Scotland, if you don't mind my saying so, Your Majesty. According to this theory, the Scottish people subconsciously associate the Loch Ness Monster with a "cancer on their body politic" or a "blight on Scottish society" or "an untouchable so horrifyingly alien to our social structure that we classify this untouchable creature as a hideous and often-invisible monster," so to speak. So inevitably my question about the Loch Ness Monster is: If you yourself were a social psychologist or sociologist, how would you yourself explain the obsession of the Scottish people with a hypothetical Loch Ness Monster?

---Your Majesty, has it ever struck you that the Scottish people's professed obsession with a posited Loch Ness Monster was partly a means for Scotland to compete with Ireland for tourism revenue from those tourists from the United States and elsewhere who seek to visit monuments to superstition in their leisuretime travels. Ireland, as you know, takes great pride in its Leprauchan stories to entertain tourists with; and it often seems as if Scottish people are just as determined to entertain tourists to Scotland with Loch Ness Monster stories. It has often seemed as if the Loch Ness Monster mythology has offered Scottish people the opportunity to outdo the Irish in superstition prowess, if you will, by claiming a more intriguing supernatural presence and magical power than Ireland itself could offer, in the view of those Scotsmen.

---Your Majesty, the motion-picture actor Sean Connery is perhaps the most famous Scotsman of the latter 20th Century and since then as well. Sean Connery has made public statements indicating that he would like to see Scotland secede from Great Britain and The United Kingdom. Your Majesty, have you ever considered inviting Sean Connery to meet with you at Windsor Castle or Buckingham Palace for tea, in order to attempt to find some point of agreement with that very influential cultural figure?

---Your Majesty, have you sometimes sensed that Sean Connery, who ever since the
1960s has arguably been the most famous British gentleman embodying the theme of male adult virility, possibly balks at England because he regards the men of England as not being manly enough for Sean Connery?

---Your Majesty, would you like to see the establishment of a Rotating Annual Shakespeare Award and accompanying generous financial prize that would be conferred each successive year on a permanent resident of England, Scotland, Wales, or Northern Ireland, respectively, who through that individual's published creative play-writing exhibited the greatest potential of achieving Shakespearean excellence in the field of theatrical play-writing.


---Your Majesty, do you ever sense that many of the British citizens who reside outside of the London metro area look upon London as the "Hub of Debauchery" for the entire United Kingdom? Do you believe that London should be more responsive toward the needs of British citizens from outlying regions who are themselves appalled by illicit-drug addiction, rampant public intoxication and alcohol addiction, profane speech, urban violence, sexual trafficking and prostitution, widespread evidence of pederastic crimes, rampant addiction to tattoos, and other societal problems those Britons associate with London? Or is it possible, in your view, for a law-abiding and clean-talking resident of Wales to enjoy a completely wholesome and pleasant visit to London without ever himself or herself feeling degraded or debauched or corrupted or compromised by that traveling experience?

---Your Majesty, have you yourself ever experienced periods of doubt and uncertainty and pessimism as to whether you reside in and reign over a truly "Great" Britain, as your country's name clearly states, or whether your country has, in back, retrogressed into being merely a "Good Britain" or a "Sometimes Good, Sometimes Mediocre Britain," even. How did you respond to any such periods of doubt or pessimism you may have yourself experienced about the overall caliber of the European nation you preside over?

---Your Majesty, do you sense at times that many of the 21st Century British citizens lack a strong sense of what it means to be a truly Great British citizen, as distinct from an ordinary and unexceptional British citizen.

---Your Majesty, you have no doubt heard many entertaining stories about conduct by American tourists in Great Britain. Of all the stories you have heard about American tourists in or American visitors to Great Britain, does any particular story strike you as being particularly memorable or amusing? For instance, have you ever had an American visitor at Buckingham Palace who told you he's heard that the world-famous "Welsh Rabbit" is a British entree that's particularly tasty and delicious, and that he would like to go on a Welsh Rabbit hunt in order to help obtain fresh rabbit meat for a meal of that type at Buckingham Palace? If so, it must have been rather awkward for you to have to explain to that American citizen that the famous Welsh dish is actually a cheese dish called Welsh Rarebit, and not, as he had assumed, Welsh Rabbit.

---Your Majesty, millions of American schoolchildren traditionally have sung the lyrics, "London Bridge Is Falling Down, Falling Down," as part of their informal childhood "education" about Great Britain. Some might say that the popular children's song seems to convey the message that Britain is a land where entropy and collapse and societal decline are widespread. When you reflect on the loss of the great London Bridge, and that famous children's song relating to your country, and the sale of the historic and great London Bridge in the early 1970s to an American entrepreneur who then relocated it to the U.S. state of Arizona for public display there, do you sometimes feel that American society in a rapacious manner has massively and pervasively violated the national cultural integrity of Great Britain in that and other ways?

----Your Majesty, it used to be said of your country that "The Sun Never Sets on the British Empire," and I'm sure that your great ancestor Queen Victoria must have taken particular pride in that saying. Do you ever find yourself wishing that Great Britain in the 21st Century would forge a new and modern type of empire of some type that would be popular throughout the world?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have heard vivid stories about American tourists' impressions of the weather in London and Great Britain. To hear most Americans talk about your country, it often seems as if they would suggest that the signs at the London airport greeting visitors to your country should read, "WELCOME TO THE FOG AND RAINSTORM HUB OF THE UNIVERSE." Your Majesty, do you believe that it might actually be beneficial to Great Britain's global reputation if you were to authorize the establishment of a "British Institute for the Study of Foggy Weather and Rainstorms". Might a research institute with that focus at least convey the message to the entire world that Great Britain is determined to respond in a rational and resourceful and cheerful manner to the weather-related challenges that life in Britain entails.

---Your Majesty, the news in the 21st Century that Mercedes-Benz of Germany had acquired Rolls Royce, an automobile maker that long epitomized British society, must have been rather sobering to you. Do you recall your first reaction when you learned that Mercedes-Benz of Germany was seeking to purchase Rolls Royce? Did you pursue any actions to attempt to discourage that purchase by a German automobile manufacturer?

---When Mercedes Benz of Germany acquired Rolls Royce, did you find yourself reflecting on how your beloved father, King George VI, would have reacted to that news, had he been alive at the time? I raise this question partly because Mercedes- Benz was one of the the leading manufacturers of German military vehicles during World War II; and your father no doubt despised Mercedes-Benz in the late 1930s and 1940s, and possibly even at the time of his death in 1952.

--Your Majesty, have you ever considered asking the leaders of the British film-making industry to make a point of filming some of their fictional movies in outlying regions of Great Britain such as Wales, Northern Ireland, and Scotland? I raise this question partly because I'm sure that many people all over the world would find it reassuring to watch a movie set in Northern Ireland which indicated that it is humanly possible to live in 21st Century Northern Ireland without being physically attacked by the Irish Republican Army or some other militant group.

---Your Majesty, would you support the dedication of a special new public outdoor or indoor botanical garden or monument or statue in Northern Ireland that would be designed to specifically highlight and celebrate the 21st Century harmony and peaceful relations between Protestants and Roman Catholics who reside in Northern Ireland?

---I'm reminded, Your Majesty, that in my own country, The United States, one of the leading sources of religious and political strife relates to abortion. Many Christians in America oppose the legal right of a woman or female youth, even, to undergo an abortion. And certain militant Christian groups in the USA in recent years have even attempted to bomb abortion clinics or murder physicians who perform abortions. In The United Kingdom, by contrast, there apparently is no comparable recent history of Christian opponents of abortion resorting to violence against those who perform abortions in your country. Have you been pleased by the civility and restraint that the British people have exhibited about this very emotional societal issue?

---Your Majesty, have you ever had occasion to request a report from the British Government about trends in vasectomy-surgery operations in The United Kingdom? I raise this question because vasectomies, as you must be very aware, can spare many thousands of British women and British girls from their being subjected to the severe indignity and major emotional trauma and medical risks relating to an unwanted pregnancy or an abortion.

---Would you support the establishment of a proposed "Queen Elizabeth II Vasectomy Center" in Great Britain that would perform vasectomy surgeries upon request and would significantly enhance the quality of life and medical health of many thousands of British women, British girls, British men, and British boys?

----Your Majesty, would you like to see an outstanding and honorable vasectomy surgeon in your country each year receive a special award from yourself or the British Parliament, that honors that surgeon for his outstanding public service in helping to prevent hundreds or thousands of unwanted pregnancies each year in The United Kingdom?

--In your own life, have you yourself ever directly advised any woman or female youth to undergo an abortion? Have you ever directly advised any woman or female youth to NOT undergo an abortion?

---Your Majesty, would you like to see more in the way of royally-sponsored traveling entertainment troupes or traveling museum exhibits or traveling library exhibits that originate in London and then travel into a variety of cities of Wales, Northern Ireland, and Scotland, as well as a variety of cities in England. Would traveling cultural offerings of that type help to reduce the cultural-literacy gap, as you yourself may well refer to it, between England and, on the other hand, Wales, Northern Ireland, and Scotland?


--Your Majesty, do you believe it would be best for Great Britain and The United Kingdom in the long run if the British Government were to sponsor an official policy of Cultural Decentralization that permits any British citizen and any visitor to any geographic area of Great Britain to enjoy full access to rich nearby cultural opportunities situated inside Wales and Northern Ireland and throughout all of England and Scotland.

---Your Majesty, you must have been painfully aware throughout much of World War II that during wartime, the enemy is likely to target London for bombing attacks. Do you think it would be prudent and wise of Britsh Government to anticipate a worst-case scenario of the future in which London might conveivably be annihilated by an enemy force? I am refering to a hypothetical scenario in which outlying geogrphical sections of Great Britain might then be expected to hold a much greater responsibility for perpetuating the great British traditions of culture and education.

---Your Majesty, many of your subjects, and many Americans as well, would be very grateful to you if you would be willing to please state what you yourself love the most about Wales, Northern Ireland, and Scotland, respectively. I raise this question because I'm sure that many of your observers assume, whether rightly or wrongly, that England, alone above all other geographical areas in the United Kingdom, according to this observation about you, claims all or nearly all of your own greatest and most enthusiastic love and heartfelt appreciation.

---Of the various first-rate fictional movies that you have watched or attended, which first-rate movies presented British society and British people in the most favorable light? Of the various fictional movies you have watched or attended, which movies depicted the natural scenery, home life, and architectural scenery in Great Britain as being beautiful to the point of dazzling.

--Your Majesty, the vast majority of all American citizens of today would only be able to list two total universities in all of Great Britain. Those two universities, of course, are Oxford and Cambridge. As Head of State for The United Kingdom, do you believe that more should be done to promote and publicize each of the other universities in your nation that you yourself also regard as being first-rate and sponsoring outstanding research on a frequent basis?

--Your Majesty, does it ever pose a concern to you to sense that to millions of people all over the world, your own beloved England, Renowned Land of Gentility, is primarily regarded as being a fine fictional setting for shocking and outrageous acts of murder? I am referring, of course, to the world-famous and enormously popular novels of Dame Agatha Christie and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle---mystery novels in which the determined civility and cerebrality of daily English life is suddenly and jarringly disrupted by the scandalous discovery of a dead person, and a murdered dead person at that!

---Your Majesty, it seems likely that some of your admirers have occasionally compared you to the prim and proper and diligently perspicacious and astute Miss Marple, a world-famous fictional protagonist and crime-fighting sleuth from Agatha Christie's murder mystery novels. Of all the characters of Agatha Christie's novels, is Miss Marple the one fictional character whom you yourself identified with the most?

----Your Majesty, do you currently believe that the fictional protagonist Miss Marple of Agatha Christie's murder mystery novels, played a noteworthy role in promoting greater respect by all British citizens for the intellectual capabilities and talents of women in British society?

---Is there any other fictional character from British literature whom you have identified with or empathized with quite extensively?

---Your Majesty, would you like to see a trend in British mystery novels toward an honorably alert police detective apprehending a would-be murderer before that criminal could succeed at actually murdering someone? Do you believe there should be a place for crime-deterrence-minded investigations in the fictional novels set in Great Britain? Would you like to see more "Who-Would-Have-Done-It" mysteries, and fewer "Who-Done-It" murder mysteries, that are set in your country?

--Of the currently living poets of Great Britain, which individual's published poems appeal to you the most?

---Your Majesty, if you could select one or two published poems from all of British history and then share that poem or those two poems with everyone all over the world, which one poem or two poems would you choose?

--Your Majesty, many of your subjects are no doubt curious to know whether you yourself have ever pursued fiction-writing as a creative pastime. I raise this question partly because some literary scholars have speculated that one of your predecessors, Queen Elizabeth I, may have written some or several theatrical plays in the 16th Century. This inevitably suggests the question of whether you yourself have tried your own hand at fiction-writing and creative writing, whether that be short stories, novels, theatrical plays, essays, or poetry. If so, were you pleased by the creative writing that you accomplished, and do you plan to have your creative writing pieces anthologized into a book at some point?

---Your Majesty, there must be many nights when the demands of your role as Queen of The United Kingdom make it very difficult for you to fall asleep in your Royal bedroom. On nights of that type, do you have any favorite reading material you like to study or favorite musical recording you like to listen to that invariably has a somnolent effect on you? I raise this question partly because I distinctly recall from my own life that listening to the music of Gordon Lightfoot, a famous Canadian singer and musician, left me feeling a bit drowsy.

---Many of your admirers all over the world are no doubt wondering about your own favorite aphorisms, or quotations that you like to recall----wise sayings that you regard as being particularly inspirational to yourself. For instance, do you find yourself quoting Horace's pithy advice, "Never Despair," on occasion? Or do you find Winston Churchill's pithy saying, "Never Surrender," or words to that effect, to be more inspirational for you?

--If an admiring British subject of yours were to ask you to please sum up your own personal credo for living in 10 words or less, how would you respond to that request?

---Would you ever consider authorizing the design and issuance of an inspirational wall poster or book marker featuring a photograph or sketch of yourself that many Britons and members of your Commonwealth nations would particularly enjoy, and also featuring three or more of your all-time favorite aphorisms or wise sayings that either you yourself wrote or verbalized, or some thinker whom you admire has written.

--Your Majesty, and I realize that I'm exploring a rather sensitive subject with this question, have you kept a personal or private diary throughout some or much or all of your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom, or at any time before that time period? If you have, in fact, kept a diary during or before your reign, is there any circumstance in which you might agree to have portions of that diary published in the near future?

---It is likely, for instance, that your personal diary entries from the
1930s and 1940s reveal considerable moral indignation about violent and bellicose conduct you observed by German Chancellor Adolph Hitler. Was Chancellor Hitler, a dictator, the one figure from your entire life whom you found yourself disliking or hating the most intensely? Could you describe today how it felt to you back in the 1930s and 1940s when you reflected on Adolph Hitler's reign of terror?

---Do you recall paying an official visit to Germany in the 1950s or 1960s or 1970s, or possibly even since then, in which you found it very difficult to sleep at night in Germany, since you were haunted that night by your understandably grim memories of Nazi Germany's brutal savagery toward British citizens and millions of others during World War II.

---Your Majesty, does it surprise you, and possibly even alarm you, to be informed by me today that in the mid-1990s, I had a leisuretime conversation with a civic leader in Odessa, Texas---a gentleman with a British surname---who surprised me by stating to me on his own volition during our conversation that "The biggest mistake that Germany made during World War II was that Germany did not bomb England often enough. Germany should have bombed Great Britain much more frequently than Germany did."

---Your Majesty, are you yourself alarmed by the tendency of many 21st Century male observers of World War II to analyze that war primarily in terms of military strategy, and in terms of which side, whether that be the Axis Powers or the Allies, exhibited the greatest "brilliance on the battlefield," as it were, on any given day?

--Your Majesty, do you believe that the British people would have been severely demoralized, and Great Britain would have been invaded and defeated by Nazi Germany during World War II, had you and your Royal Family sought refuge in Canada during that war, as was tentatively recommended by advisers of yours for several members of your Royal Family during that time period.

---Your Majesty, you may recall that the English fiction writer and essayist Virginia Woolf in her World War II diaries complained about the headaches inflicted on her, and the difficulty she had in attempting to concentrate in her fiction-writing pursuits, because of the repeated bombings in England by German warplanes. At one point in her World War II diaries, Miss Woolf even noted that it might be preferable if Germany succeeded at conquering Great Britain as soon as possible, since then "it would be all over and done with," or words to that effect. Looking back, do you believe that many of your countrymen in the early 1940s or late 1930s privately concluded that Great Britain would lose the war, anyway, and secretly hoped that Germany would win the war as soon as possible and thereby presumably put an end to the repeated bombings in England?

----Your Majesty, many admirers of yours would appreciate the opportunity to read and reflect on personal letters of yours to and from your personal friends and relatives through the years. Is there any possibility that you would be willing to release to an approved media company or an approved book publisher any of those personal letters of yours that you might be willing to share with the general public in the year 2009? I raise this question partly because the art of letter-writing appears to be in jeopardy these days, particularly in this modern era characterized by terse and blunt and often-vulgar E-mail letters.

---Your Majesty, have you ever considered authorizing a series of official Oral History interviews featuring yourself as the member of the Royal Family who might be responding to an interviewer's questions for that invaluable addition to the British historical archives.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that there has been an adequate amount of sociological research about the Royal Family by scholars in Great Britain? Would you support the proposed establishment of an "Institute for the Study of the British Royalty" in your country?

---Your Majesty, I myself cannot recall having ever once seen you chuckle or laugh during any televised appearance of yours. Would you be willing to please estimate how often you did, in fact, laugh or chuckle during your various televised appearances since you assumed the throne in the early 1950s?

---Your Majesty, how would you respond to those observers of yours who say that you are personally opposed to humor, and that you are also personally opposed to any comments that you might regard as being flippant. Does humor comprise a threat to your country, in your view?

---Does it ever alarm you, Your Majesty, to sense that hundreds or thousands of "British Queen jokes" and "British Royalty jokes" have been verbalized by subjects of yours and observers of yours in foreign countries, too, throughout much of your reign. It seems likely, in fact, that there have even been books published that exclusively contained citedly witty or amusing jokes about the Queen of The United Kingdom and your Royal Family. You must have felt very tempted, at times, to yourself ask Parliament or a judge in a court of law in Great Britain to please impose a ban on the publication or sale of a "Queen Jokes" book relating to yourself or any other member of your British Royal Family. Or did you, in fact, ever make such a request of Parliament or a judge in a court of law, from what you can currently recall?

---Your Majesty, you have of course met thousands of entertaining and witty people in your life. Does any one person whom you've spoken with in person at any time during your entire period as ruling Queen---or from your days before you assumed the throne, for that matter---stand out as having elicited or inspired the greatest amount of mirthful laughter or chuckling or delighted amusement from you?

--Of the various comedians, humorists, comic actors, and comedy troupes whom you can recall, which individuals or troupes have been your personal favorite?

---Your Majesty, many Americans during their youth are led to believe that virtually every monarch of Great Britain has employed a "Court Jester," if you will. During your reign as Queen, have you yourself ever employed any individual while expecting him or her to serve as the "Court Jester" at Buckingham Palace or Windsor Castle?

---Your Majesty, in the nation where I come from, The United States of America, I several months ago received an E-mail reply letter from the Civil Rights Division Director of the Texas Workforce Commission (TWC) in Austin, Texas, that cited an apparent "criminal-law" matter relating to my own working conditions at a workplace at that time. The E-mail reply letter to me from a TWC official concluded, surprisingly, with, "Be of good cheer!" That reply letter cited no basis for any actions on my own behalf by the Texas Workforce Commission in regard to the cited problem, stating that a law-enforcement agency would instead be the applicable government agency to contact. The reply letter from the TWC, incidentally, was in response to a civilly worded complaint from myself relating to alleged violations of my own legal and Constitutional rights in Austin.
Your Majesty, have you ever sensed that the widely-quoted philosophy for living that many Americans attribute to the English---"Be of Good Cheer!" --- is often being mis-used as a basis for cited inaction or as a basis for advocating complacency or fatuousness or a cited "attitude" adjustment or "internal transformation" in any given adult human being, when it would be more appropriate and helpful for that human being to simply file a criminal-law complaint or civil-law legal complaint in a court of law in Austin, Texas, for instance.

---In your own life, Your Majesty, have you yourself ever balked or objected to the comment when a British citizen advised you to "Be of Good Cheer!"

---Your Majesty, if you were asked to cite the one British citizen who lived at any time during your reign, and who most embodied or most currently embodies the "Be of Good Cheer!" philosophy, which British citizen would you cite?

---Your Majesty, of the various gentlemen whom you have knighted during your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom, which one gentleman stood out as having most embodied that famous English maxim, "Be of Good Cheer!"

---Your Majesty, were you ever tempted to knight the Hollywood actor Cary Grant, himself a famous native of your country, or did his reported philandering compromise his credentials as a candidate for knighthood, in your view?

---Your Majesty, do you recall the one knighting ceremony you presided over that gave you the greatest satisfaction and pleasure in your noble role as Queen of The United Kingdom and as a religious leader for your country.

---Your Majesty, do you recall the calendar year when you knighted the largest total number of your subjects---even if that was only three gentlemen whom you knighted in that particular year, and I confess that I simply don't have the year-by-year totals on your knighting ceremonies.

---Your Majesty, have you ever knighted one of your subjects and then, whether that be weeks later or days later or years later, regretted having conferred such a great honor upon that individual?

---Your Majesty, you must be literally flooded with polite requests from British citizens that you please consider knighting yet another very distinguished gentleman or another, with each request providing you with the legal name of that gentleman and a brief biography highlighting his accomplishments in life. Do you often find it difficult to decide whether to knight any given gentleman whom you have been urged by others to knight?

---Your Majesty, have you ever considered granting a posthumous knighthood upon a British subject whose remarkable career and personal credentials somehow had escaped your attention --- possibly because one of your very diligent assistants over a multi-yea period failed to mention him to you as a candidate for knighthood ---during his lifetime, with yourself wishing to at least honor his family and friends by knighting that outstanding gentleman a matter of days or weeks or months or years, even, after he had died. I was reminded of this by recalling today that the Roman Catholic Church, for instance, often confers posthumous awards upon Catholic gentlemen and Catholic ladies who, after they died in connection with deplorable religious persecution of themselves, are years later exalted and publicly honored by the Roman Catholic Church as having been "saints."

---Your Majesty, your admirers are no doubt very familiar with the official sword you wield while knighting a very distinguished gentleman. Is that the only occasion in which you are ever expected to hold a sword or weapon as part of your duties as Queen? Does it ever feel uncomfortable for you to be holding what you know to be a weapon in your hand at the time when you knight one of your subjects?

---Your Majesty, do you believe it might be fair and appropriate for a very distingusihed British gentleman who is under age 30 or 40, and possibly even as young as age 18, say, to qualify for being knighted by yourself? Do you recall the age of the youngest gentleman whom you yourself ever knighted? Did you later regret that decision to knight a gentleman at that particular age, or do you believe it was a healthy precedent on behalf of societal innovation in the Monarch-conferred awarding of the knighthood to honorable gentlemen.

-Do you subscribe to the view that a senior citizen in Great Britain who attends live-theater plays should generally watch comedies instead of tragedies, based on the theory that plays that are comedies might have a rejuvenating effect on a senior citizen.

----Your Majesty, many people associate you with a great devotion to studying the Christian Bible on a year-bound basis. However, many of your admirers might not be aware of the published book or published books other than the Bible that you have yourself read and re-read with the keenest interest during your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom. Would you be willing to please cite the titles or genres of the books other than the Christian Bible that you have read and re-read the most frequently during your reign?

---Your Majesty, I recently found a photograph of you on the Internet that shows you wearing a cheerful light-green-colored blouse. Is it your view that British citizens after they reach age 60, say, should particularly strive for cheerful colors and designs in their fashionwear---presumably in order to celebrate life and human vitality all the more enthusiastically and gratefully.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that a British citizen of any age should generally strive to wear outfits with cheerful colors and cheerful designs during the fall and winter seasons of the year? I raise this question because, as I'm sure you are painfully aware, the winter season in northern states of America, for instance, is traditionally the season when the per-capita incidence of suicide is the greatest. It seems likely that you as the reigning Queen have concluded that promoting cheerfully-colored attire by your subjects during the wintertime will help them to sustain and support their will to live, and therefore prevent any tendency toward suicide, during the winter months.

---While we are on the subject of suicide, Your Majesty, the tragic circumstances of the suicide of one of Great Britain's most famous female writers, Virginia Woolf, in the early 1940s, must be very sobering to you. If Virginia Woolf had approached you during the early 1940s and had confided in you what she later reportedly wrote in her suicide note, that "I (Virginia Woolf) have nothing more to say," how would you have responded to her verbalized despair? Would you have urged Miss Woolf to consider pursuing an alternative creative career, such as teaching English or writing propaganda pamphlets for the Allies during that time period?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure that many of your admirers would be curious to learn which of the various fashionwear designers whom you have patronized since the early 1950s, when you assumed the throne, have been or currently are your personal favorites?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure that many of your admirers all over the world would like to know how you would describe an "ideal day" in the life of yourself, Queen Elizabeth II, assuming that it were humanly possible to enjoy an entire 24-hour-period in which everything in your life, including your personal or private life, went as you wanted it to go. Do you recall the last year or month in which you experienced your entire 24-hour day to be consistently very fine or very enjoyable for you?

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers are no doubt wondering whether you could cite any particular year or decade of your life as having been your happiest and most fulfilling time period. Which year or decade of your life thus far would you cite as having been or currently being your own all-time favorite?

---Your Majesty, I once spoke with a senior citizen who commented to me with sadness that that individual was devoting far too much time during her retirement years to attending funerals. What advice would you offer to any British citizen who finds it rather dreary and depressing to be attending funerals. Do you recommend, for instance, that a British citizen attending lots of funerals should focus instead on expressing a polite human affinity toward an admirable survivor of the deceased, as one of the best ways to participate fully in that funeral. Or, as an alternative, do you recommend that a British citizen attending lots of funerals should reflect on traits and conduct of the deceased that can also be found in living persons who are also present at that funeral that day---and then be all the more generous and kind toward that living individual that day.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that it is possible to attend lots of funerals and memorial services in Great Britain and still feel emotionally uplifted and energized by those funeral ceremonies.

---Your Majesty, would you be dismayed if you were to ever learn that any employer in your nation currently fails to fully honor the asserted legal right of any British citizen working for that employer to take time off from work at that individual's own expense in order to attend a funeral or memorial service----or a friend's or relative's wedding, for that matter.

---As I'm sure you must be very aware, many observers of senior citizens proceed on assumption that nearly all of them are absent-minded or senile. That assumption, of course, is very inaccurate. However, there must be observers who do accurately and fairly note that many British senior citizens, even in your intellectually vital country, appear to have lost their dedication to lifelong-education pursuits in their 60s, 70s, 80s, or 90s. What advice would you offer to your nation's senior citizens on how they can keep up their personal education and a strong sense of personal intellectual vitality throughout their entire life?

---Your Majesty, many people admire your personal fluency in French. Do you feel that you are as fluent in French today as you were 50 years ago? In view of your own very apparent Francophilia, would you like to see a special educational program established in Great Britain that would help Britons of any age to retain and hone their knowledge of French.

---Do you yourself have a favorite French restaurant from among all the French restaurants in Great Britain?


---Of the French poets, essayists, and fiction-writers, who are your personal favorites?

--I read recently on the Internet that early during your tenure as Queen of The United Kingdom, or possibly shortly before you assumed the throne, two respective high-ranking government officials from your country and from France discussed whether it might be advisable for Great Britain and France to merge into one nation. Do you recall your own personal reaction to that tentative public-policy proposal back in the early 1950s? Did it ever cross your mind whether London or, alternatively, Paris, would make a better capital city for that proposed new European nation combining Great Britain and France.

---You must be very accustomed to Yourself being compared by others to Queen Elizabeth I. Which attribute or accomplishment of Queen Elizabeth I do you admire the most, and why? If it were somehow possible for you to hold a successful Royal Seance Session with Queen Elizabeth I, which question or questions would you most want to pose to Queen Elizabeth I?

---At the time of your birth when your parents assigned you the first name of "Elizabeth," did that choice of theirs reflect their own fervent wish that you would grow up to have remarkable similarities of personality and achievement to those of Queen Elizabeth I? During your youth, did your parents exhort you to "be like Queen Elizabeth I" in some cited context?

---During your childhood and teenage years in Great Britain, did you ever resent comments from your parents or others that they possibly expected you to grow up to become "like Queen Elizabeth I"? Did you ever resent Queen Elizabeth I herself for somehow imposing on you that type of "Royal Burden of Emulation", as you may have seen it at the time.

---Is Queen Elizabeth I the one monarch of British history whom you personally admire the most and whom you believe made the biggest overall contribution to your country?

---American schoolteachers have traditionally taught their students about Queen Elizabeth I in the context of emphasizing that reigning monarch's inspirational effect on Shakespeare in his play-writing pursuits. If you were asked today to comment on which of the 20th or 21st Century playwrights and other fiction writers of Great Britain have been the most inspired by you yourself in their creative writing pursuits, which writer or writers would you cite?

---Do you agree with the observation made by the Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw in a published 20th Century essay he wrote, that Shakespear's plays are too pessimistic and overemphasize tragic outcomes.

---Of the various theatrical plays that you yourself have enjoyed the most, which play was your all-time personal favorite? Would you characterize that play as having been "optimistic" and cheerful, or, on the other hand, pessimistic and bleak, in its evaluation of British society and human beings?

---When you reflect on Queen Elizabeth I's reign, do you sometimes think to yourself that if you had been that queen at the time, you would have pursued actions to spare the life of Mary, Queen of Scots? Or do you regard it as perfectly understandable on the part of Queen Elizabeth I that she ordered the execution of that Scottish queen?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you are very familiar with the Queen of Hearts, the capricious monarch of the fictional work "Alice in Wonderland" that was written by Lewis Carroll of Great Britain. Are there ever any occasions during your own real-life reign when you found yourself identifying with the Queen of Hearts? I am referring, for instance, to her customary practice of responding to any subject's or any intruder's conduct she disapproved of by herself declaring, "Off with their heads!"

---If you could somehow enter a time tunnel in order to help change the course of British history on one day or during one time period of British history, which date or period of British history would you select for that intervention on your part?

--Do you recall the occasion when you felt yourself to be prouder and happier than ever for being the reigning monarch of Great Britain?

---Your Majesty, of the hundreds of publicly televised speeches you have given thus far during your reign as Queen, do you recall any speech in particular that you feel was your own very finest speech ever?

---Your Majesty, do you recall any particular suggestion or advice or constructively worded and well-intended criticism you received from anyone, and that you feel was very helpful to you at any time during your reign?

---Your Majesty, many people assume that you as Queen of The United Kingdom almost never receive a "no" or a refusal from anyone whom you make a request of. Is that impression accurate? On those rare occasions, and I assume they are very rare, in fact, when a British citizen subject of yours balks at a request you make of him or her, was there any particular refusal or rejection letter you received that offended you greatly or was emotionally very hurtful to you?

---Your Majesty, have you ever entertained fantasies or daydreams, if you will, about how your own life would have gone had you been a commoner in England whose information about the Royal Family was limited to news media accounts and second-hand accounts from friends and relatives of yours who told you they had "caught a glimpse of the Queen" earlier that day. Do you think you would have been among the leading admirers of the ruling Queen, regardless of who that might have been, had you led the modest life of a commoner?

---Your Majesty, in those occasional fantasies or daydreams you may have had about what your life might have been like had you instead been a commoner in England, do you ever imagine yourself in any particular career? Would you have enjoyed being a teacher or playwright or essayist or medical doctor or restaurant owner, for instance, assuming that you could imagine life for yourself as a commoner?

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very mindful of the comment by many American observers that "the reigning monarch in 21st Century Great Britain is a figurehead, a titular head of state who has no actual power." Do you regard that typical American outlook as being very unfair and unappreciative toward yourself?

---As Queen of The United Kingdom, did you ever suspect that any of your subjects--- or any other persons who spoke with you or wrote to you, for that matter----admired you more for your financial wealth than for your accomplishments and style in your very influential role as the official Head of State of your country.

---Did it ever feel a bit like a curse in your life for you, to sense that many of your observers were commenting to each other, "Queen Elizabeth II has the Midas touch of that legendary King of Crete. Everything that Queen Elizabeth II touches, turns into gold."

---Your Majesty, have you ever experienced an unexpected in-person encounter between yourself and a subject of yours, in which you observed that that individual appeared to be very afraid of you. If so, what did you say or do to reassure that individual?

---Your Majesty, you have presided over numerous prime ministers of Great Britain during your reign. Which of those prime ministers conveyed the greatest amount of respect and admiration toward yourself?

---Of the British prime ministers you have presided over, which prime minister consulted you the most extensively?

---Your Majesty, the period in which your prime minister was a lady, Mrs. Margaret Thatcher, must have felt particularly historic to you. Were you very proud of the British people for having selected a woman to serve as your nation's first-ever prime minister? Also, did you yourself feel comfortable with the nickname of "Iron Lady" that the news media apparently dubbed Mrs. Thatcher?

---Of all the former prime ministers of Great Britain, was Dame Margaret Thatcher the one individual whom you have had the closest personal ties with?

---Your Majesty, have you ever felt under-employed in your role as the reigning Queen of The United Kingdom? I raise that question partly because, as I'm sure you must be very aware, many people of today tend to complain that the position of employment they currently hold is not intellectually rewarding enough or creatively fulfilling enough for them. Do you ever sense that your own analytical faculties are not being adequately challenged by your position as Queen of the United Kingdom? For instance, would you welcome the opportunity to attend and participate yourself in meetings of an official British advisory commission studying a societal problem or societal issue of some type?

--Your Majesty, it must put a smile on your face at times when you reflect on the great nobility and valor on the part of many Canadian citizens, Australian citizens, New Zealand citizens, British Virgin Islands residents, and other citizens of British Commonwealth nations or territories. Have you ever considered specially knighting or specially honoring at Buckingham Palace a citizen of a Commonwealth nation other than Great Britain whom you particularly admire and appreciate?

--Your Majesty, do you feel that The United Kingdom should do more than it currently does to honor and reward Americans of British ancestry who have outstanding creative and idealistic accomplishments?

---Your Majesty, do you ever recall having yourself attempted to knight a gentleman, only to be told by that gentleman that he declined that honor? If so, would you be willing to describe that no-doubt awkward experience for you during your reign as Queen?

--Of all the members of Royal Families outside the British Commonwealth, which queen or king or princess or prince is your personal favorite?

--Of all the violent dethronings of kings and queens that have occurred in world history, which dethroning triggers the greatest moral indignation or anger from you? Do you find yourself enraged, for instance, by the Russian revolutionaries' brutal murder of Czar Nicolas and Czarina Alexandra or their children, the latter of whom, after all, were utterly blameless? Does the beheading of 19th Century Queen Antoinette of France prompt considerable indignation from you today? Do you feel, for instance, that those who overthrew Queen Antoinette should have merely banished her to an island in the Mediterranean? Would that have been more humane and proper toward her?

---Your Majesty, is there any activity or lifestyle practice or event you would personally like to participate in or pursue, but your role as the reigning Monarch of your great Northern European nation prevents you from doing so?

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers would be curious to know whether you are currently permitted by the British Government to ever pursue a vacation for yourself on the Queen Elizabeth II cruise ship? Or would British national security considerations prohibit you from being a passenger on that ship that was, after all, named after yourself? If so, dos the irony of it all irk you a bit?

---Your Majesty, does it ever pose a concern to you to sense that the very elegant formality and regal posture at all times that many Americans associate with yourself, is then assumed by many of those Americans to be a national characteristic of the vast majority of all British citizens as well. Do you sense at times that Americans all too often regard British people as being utterly incapable of spontaneity, utterly incapable of ever shedding their presumably permanent sense of inhibition, utterly incapable of informality, and utterly incapable of personal flexibility?

----Your Majesty, many Americans assume that in Great Britain, the royalty almost exclusively socialize with other members of the royalty, and the commoners almost exclusively socialize with other commoners. Is it really that rigid in your country, though, this sense of a societally-defined group of persons with whom one would be expected to socialize during one's leisuretime? In your own life, for instance, are any of your own strictly-personal friends of today individuals who are not members of the royalty?

---Many Americans indicate that they look upon the class system of Great Britain as being similar to the traditional caste system of India. Do you subscribe to the view that a person born in 21st Century Great Britain will almost certainly either remain at that same cited "class" level or fall to a lower "class" level, regardless of how diligently they pursue education and how industrious they are in their career pursuits. Or is that, in fact, an example of misleading American "propaganda" about British society that you regard as being unfair?

--Your Majesty, many people have no doubt been intrigued by the fact that decades ago you fell in love with a man of Greek ancestry, and you later decided to marry him. Do you believe tht your emotional and aesthetic attraction to Philip partly derived in part from your own great admiration for the historic contributions to human civilization that were made by Greeks of ancient history? When you glanced at Philip, were you occasionally reminded of Socrates, Aristotle, and Peracles? Or was there some other figure from ancient Greek history, such as the Greek God Zeus, whom Philip reminded you of?

--I'm sure you must be very aware that the American news media often depict Great Britain as a nation wedded to tradition and a sense of protocol at all times. This inevitably prompts a question: Do you support greater societal and cultural innovation in Great Britain, and if so, how are you as Head of State of The United Kingdom helping to foster that innovation on the British Isles?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very aware that many Americans look upon Great Britain as a nation where pageantry reigns at all times. Is there some truth to this American impression, in your view---an impression, I might add, that is often accompanied by Americans' remembrance of a famous line from a great British writer: "All of life's a stage," or words to that effect.

----Your Majesty, you must be very mindful of the fact that the famous Madame Tussauds Wax Museum in London will someday seek to add yourself to the repertoire of wax statues inside that museum----if that museum hasn't already done so, I might add. Does that prospect appeal to you, or would you prefer that that world-famous wax museum in London never add a wax statue depicting yourself to its exhibits?

---Your Majesty, is there any risk of something vital and spontaneous and authentically honest and philosophically deep and profoundly innovative, at the same time, somehow being inhibited or discouraged or blocked by your nation's reported obsession with pageantry and stage presence at all times? Do you have any suggestions on how British society could do more than it currently does to foster spontaneous, honest, phiosophically deep and profoundly innovative styles in your subjects?


---I would like to pose a question relating to your Royal Family's likely efforts at fostering creative innovation throughout The United Kingdom: Do you or any other member of the Royal Family of whom you are aware, currently have a tradition of each year conferring an award upon a British citizen or citizen of a British Commonwealth nation who in the most recent previous 12-month period obtained a patent on, or public acclaim for, a societally beneficial scientific invention or major scientific discovery that he had achieved?

---If you don't mind my asking, Your Majesty, would you like to see renewable energy wind-power and solar-power technology be incorporated into the architecture on the grounds of one or more of your own official residences, such as at Buckingham Palace or your palace at Windsor? Would it please you greatly to sense that your cherished Buckingham Palace were someday powered at least 50 percent by renewable energy sources?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have noticed the great power of the oceanic breezes and winds along the coastline throughout all of Great Brtain. Do you believe the British Government should do more than it currently does to install wind-power-based electricity generators at numerous points along or near the coastline of England, Wales, Scotland, and Northern Ireland?

---Your Majesty, would you support the sharing by Great Britain of renewable-energy technology and ideas with the Republic of Ireland that would help Irish society to conserve fossil fuels as well?

---Could you cite an example of a fine tradition being pursued by a majority of British citizens of today that you believe that Americans, by contrast, are not pursuing, and, in your view, should be pursuing as well.

---Your Majesty, many of your admirers throughout the world look upon you as someone who helps to instill in all people, and particularly in gentlemen, a sense of valor and chivalry at all times. I'm reminded that during my elementary school days as an American citizen in the Austin area of Texas, I vividly recall the story my fifth-grade teacher Mrs. Beck offered our class about the 16th Century occasion when Sir Walter Raleigh observed that Queen Elizabeth I was about to walk across a mud puddle. To spare the Queen from any mud splashing on herself, Sir Walter Raleigh threw his cape on top of that mud puddle, according to my teacher. This, our teacher emphasized, was an example of chivalry at its finest.

---One follow-up question: Of all the 20th and 21st Century British subjects of yours whom you can recall, which gentleman or lady has spared you from the largest number of figurative mud puddles? Has any particular gentleman who's a citizen of The United Kingdom or a British Commonwealth nation exhibited as much valor toward you as Sir Walter Raleigh exhibited toward Queen Elizabeth I?

--We have all heard about the remarkable train service situated in a tunnel underneath the English Channel that enables British citizens to travel to France by train, and French citizens to travel to Great Britain by train. Would you like to see similar train-service tunnels built under the Irish Sea that would better connect Ireland with England, and that would better connect Northern Ireland with Scotland?

--What are your own all-time favorite personal sports in which you have yourself participated?

--When was the last occasion in which you yourself ever played tennis or rallied on a tennis court at Wimbledon, for instance?

--Your Majesty, in your role as the reigning spectator at Wimbledon, you have witnessed hundreds of very fine tennis matches, including professional men's and professional ladies' tennis matches, through the decades. Do you recall which tennis match or tennis matches at Wimbledon that you watched while sitting in the stands were your all-time favorites?

---Your Majesty, do you ever find it sobering to the point of dismaying to note that for millions of Americans, they are able to achieve a sustained interest in The United Kingdom for only three weeks of every year, with those three weeks being limited to either the Wimbledon professional tennis tournament or the British Open professional golf tournament, depending on whether that American citizen was fond of tennis or golf.

---Your Majesty, does it pose a concern to you to sense that of your four geographical states of Great Britain, only Scotland, host of the British Open golf tournament, and England, host of the Wimbleton tennis tournament, currently claim the entire world's attention for a great annual sporting event featuring competitors from around the world. Would you like to also see Nothern Ireland and Wales, respectively, each host an annual international sporting event that would capture the interest and fascination of sports fans all over the world?

---Your Majesty, let us imagine a scenario in which a personal friend or friendly acquaintance of yours who's an American citizen informs you that he or she is planning to take a tour of Great Britain in 2009 for the first time in that individual's entire life. Which often-overlooked British sites and places would you yourself recommend to your friend or friendly acquaintance as additions to his or her traveling itinerary? I'm referring, of course, to places familar to yourself that most American tourists either don't know about or for generally fail to include in their leisuretime travels in Great Britain.

--Do you believe the British Government does enough at present to promote participation in athletic activities and sports among Britons over age 60? For instance, do you believe that shuffleboard or croquet or table tennis should be promoted more than they currently are among senior-citizen Britons?

--Your Majesty, it must pose a major concern to you when you witness evidence that each and every year, hundreds of professional or amateur rugby players throughout The United Kingdom suffer a loss of one or more teeth that occurs from an injury they sustain while competing in rugby. Have you ever considered requesting that the British Parliament approve a new law requiring that all British rugby players must wear a government-approved mouthguard at all times during their rugby matches or competitions?

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you have been very dismayed by frequent news reports through the decades about riots and outbreaks of violence occurring at British football or soccer matches. Much of that violence, as I'm sure you are painfully aware, pits one British city against another---a scenario conjuring up a virtual civil war within your country. Does this type of intranecine warfare, as it were, call for an official study on that societal problem by the British Government, in your view?

---Your Majesty, do you ever sense a lack of trans-British pride or lack of pan-British pride when you receive a news report about a cited soccer riot that occurred at a soccer stadium in Great Britain during or shortly after a soccer contest there featuring two professional soccer teams that are each representing a British city.

---Your Majesty, is there any circumstance in which you would like to see a British Government-imposed prohibition on alcohol consumption by any and all persons during multi-hour periods when they are attending British football or soccer matches anywhere in your country.

---Your Majesty, the enormous popularity of your nation's great soccer players and rugby players is noted every day in the British media. Do you ever sense that if the British Parliament were to reserve one seat in that governing body for a recently retired football star or rugby star, the general public throughout The United Kingdom would develop much keener interest in the proceedings of Parliament?

--In which ways would you like to see the women and girls of The United Kingdom be more like yourself than they currently are in their personal conduct?

---Your Majesty, when you meet a 16-year-old female British youth who confides to you that she is pregnant out of wedlock, do you ever find yourself shedding a sympathetic tear as you reflect on the tragic implications for that teenage British citizen and her eventual child from her single-parent status?

---Your Majesty, have you ever considered delivering a nationwide televised speech in which you politely urged all British girls and all British women, for that matter, to please ask themselves on a year-round basis whether they would truly like to endure eight months of unwanted pregnancy, along with the many difficulties of mothering a new child, that might all result from her saying yes to or failing to say no convincingly enough to any given British gentleman on any given night in your country?

--Your Majesty, I assume that you are provided each year with official current statistics on the percentage of all current British female youths and of all current British adult female citizens who have been taught how to ride a horse. In view of your own global fame for your talents as an equestrian, have you expressed concern to the British government about the need to reverse a possible decline in the percentage of all female Britsh citizens---and of all male British citizens, for that matter---who actually know how to ride a horse?

--Your Majesty, all of The United Kingdom looks upon you as being a leading Mother figure for your country. In which ways would you like to see the biological mothers and stepmothers of The United Kingdom be more like yourself than they currently are in their own personal conduct?

---In your role as Queen of Great Britain, are you routinely and automatically provided with annual or semiannual reports providing you with official estimates on the current percentage of all current British mothers raising infants or caregivers for infants in your country, who are, in fact, breast-feeding those infants? Would you like to see that nationwide percentage increased?

---Your Majesty, many people all over the world refer to you as a royal mother figure. It seems likely that mothers throughout Great Britain and the entire British Commonwealth have contacted you and asked you for advice on parenting. Do you recall any of the most memorable questions of that nature that you have received from a mother raising young children or teenage youths? What has been your response to questions about parenting that you've received through the years? Do you refer those mothers to an official Royally-endorsed Parenting Advice website, for instance?

---Your Majesty, your noble role as the leading Mother Figure for your entire country no doubt involves many visits by yourself to orphanages throughout England, Northern Ireland, Wales, and Scotland. Do you recall which of the orphanges you've visited was the most impressive to you? Would you like to see a British Government-spnosored study aimed at developing recommendations on how the level of success of your nation's orphanage services could be improved dramatically?

---Your Majesty, do you recall whether your grandmother, Queen Victoria, ever offered you guidance on how to become a successful mother raising children of your own? Queen Victoria was among the most prolific monarchic mothers of world history, so it's likely that she either wrote out guidelines on successful parenting or, at the very least, offered you or your mother careful instruction on that subject during your youth.

---Your Majesty, some observers of the English motion-picture actress Julie Andrews may have commented to you that it's rather ironic that her most famous movie depicting her as a mother figure raising children was filmed in the European nation of Austria. When you yourself reflect on the cultural legacy of that internationally famous 1960s movie "The Sound of Music," do you sometimes wish that Julie Andrews had instead portrayed a first-rate mother figure in a fictional movie set in England? Perhaps the question today should instead be: Would you like to see Julie Andrews in the 21st Century portray a very impressive grandmother figure in an award-winning fictional movie set in England?

---Your Majesty, do you believe there is a need for two or more additional orphanages in your country that are each specially designed to serve youths under age 17 who had been physically and emotionally abused or sadistically tortured by one or more of their parents or step-parents.

---Your Majesty, how would you respond to those who observers of the monarchy who express concern that many girls growing up in Great Britain suffer a loss of self-confidence from their sensing that "I (that female British youth) can strive for regality in my own way, but as a commoner I can never be as regal as the Queen Herself. That is very demoralizing to me. It seems I can be a princess, at most, but never a true Queen!"

---There must be many other girls and young women in your country who grow up with the fierce determination to be "as different from our ruling Queen as I can possibly be. Whatever example the Queen sets for us, I will strive to go the opposite direction at all times." Have you ever met any young women or female youths in your country who struck you that way? If so, do you recall what you told those women or female youths?

---Your Majesty, would you be willing to offer an estimate on the percentage of all British citizens of today who, from what you have read or heard or sensed, appear to deliberately pursue a lifestyle that is consciously aimed at "defying, and being as offensive as possible to, the Royal Family," as some of those subjects of yours might well put it in their private diary entries. I am referring to the type of shockingly visceral negativism toward the Royal Family in which a female subject of yours, upon learning that you yourself were either wearing or planning to wear a light-colored dress that day, would make a point of herself wearing a dark-colored dress that same day----with that female subject of yours looking upon every aspect of her entire life as a walking thesaurus, if you will, in which she always provided the antonym to whatever you yourself communicated or embodied.

---Your Majesty, in your dual role as head of the Anglican Church as well as the ruling head of state, do you often sense that you can best promulgate and promote lifestyle conduct you regard as admirable, if you yourself strive to exemplify that conduct in your own life without actually delivering a sermon to your citizenry on that subject? Do you sense, in other words, that you can most successfully persuade all Britons to engage in proper conduct at all times if you yourself are observed at all times practicing proper conduct?

---In your role as head of the Church of England, do you recall which clergyman gave the sermon you attended that inspired you more than any other you have ever heard in your entire life? Do you recall the title of that sermon? Have you kept a copy of the text of that sermon?

--As head of the Anglican Church, do you also preside over any international gatherings or conventions involving the Church of England with affiliated or similar religious groups such as the Episcopalian Church that's headquartered in the United States? Do you find that American citizens in the United States who are members of the Episcopalian church are more likely to earn your own personal admiration and affection than Americans of any other religious background?


---In your role as Head of the Anglican Church and as a world-famous Christian religious leader, have you yourself ever once met or become acquainted with any individual human being whom you believed at the time or later sensed had supernatural powers similar to that of a witch or warlock or deity?

---Your Majesty, do you have any distant relatives or other relatives you keep up with who reside permanently in the United States?

---Your Majesty, do you recall the most disrespectful comment or shouted words that any British citizen ever verbalized to you in person? How did you respond to that impolite conduct toward yourself?

--Your Majesty, do you recall any occasion when any subject of yours ever made any comment or pursued any action that prompted you to cry or shed tears in public, whether because you felt hurt by their conduct or because you were very touched by their conduct?

---During your nearly 60 years as Queen of Great Britain, have you ever directly observed any person or group of persons in your presence whom you sensed to possibly be capable of attempting to commit an act of violence against yourself? How did you respond on those very rare occasions when you sensed you were in the presence of someone of that criminal nature? Did you ask Scotland Yard to prepare a biographical profile for you about that individual or that group of individuals?

---Your Majesty, in your entire life thus far, have you ever spoken in person with or observed in person an individual who was himself or herself so outspoken an opponent of the monarchic system that you sensed that that individual was possibly capable of the heinous and barbarous crime of regicide?

--Your Majesty, is there any circumstance in which you as the official Head of State of The United Kingdom could ever yourself feel comfortable with a change in British law that would authorize the court-ordered capital punishment of an individual convicted in a court of law of having himself either committed the unconscionable act of homicide or of having himself committed the also-unconscionable act of attempted homicide.

---Your Majesty, we have all heard about the heinous and barbarous crime of homicide being universally deplored and denounced. But it often seems as if the equally-deplorable and unconscionable crime of attempted homicide barely elicits a wince of disapproval, if that much, from most observers of today, particularly in the United States. In the period since May or June of 1987, for instance, is there any particular and notorious case of attempted homicide that has occurred anywhere in the United States or The United Kingdom, for that matter, that you yourself are personally outraged by?

----Your Majesty, do you believe that British Government and the British legal system do a better job than do the United States Government and the American legal system at deterring conspiracies to produce a so-called "snuff movie"? By snuff movie, Your Majesty, I am refrring to a flagrantly illegal and barbarously perverse and horrifyingly illicit "entertainment industry" project in which a cited victim----a law-abiding and very honorable citizen such as myself in Austin, Texas, USA, for instance---is himself or herself involuntarily subjected to and held hostage by that film-making project, and against his or her wishes is either killed or fatally injured over the course of that outrageous and truly heinous snuff movie?

---As ruling Head of State of The United Kingdom, have you ever secretly wished that you had the legal authority to simply banish or ban from your country a person who greatly offended you or whom you believed to possibly pose a threat to your own personal security, or to Great Britain's national security? Have you, in fact, ever actually banished anyone from England, or from The United Kingdom? Have you ever banned anyone from visiting England or The United Kingdom?

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very aware that the famous British model Twiggy, and I forget her last name, was no doubt widely rumored to be anorexic. It seems likely, too, that many British girls and many British women, for that matter, sought to emulate Twiggy by pursuing a lifestyle aimed at matching her extreme slenderness---even to the point of their becoming anorexic and bulimic. When you reflect on the Twiggy phenomenon in the history of British popular culture, do you find yourself agreeing with those who came up with the popular slogan, "Feed Twiggy"?

---Did you yourself ever invite the British model Twiggy to meet you in person? If so, what advice did you offer Twiggy in person?

---Your Majesty, it seems likely that you receive annual or semiannual reports providing you with official estimates on the percentage of all British citizens who are believed to be anorexic. As you of course know, anorexia can be fatally injurious to a person who has that medical illness. Would you support the establishment of a Queen Elizabeth II Center for the Treatment of Anorexia that would serve as many British citizens as possible who suffer from that alarming medical problem?

---Your Majesty, there must be many occasions when you encounter a young British woman and you feel initial uncertainty as to whether you should congratulate that lady on her admirably slender physique or, on the other hand, whether you should ask her if she has consulted a medical physician recently to determine whether she is, in fact, suffering from anorexia. In the latter case, would you then be inclined to discreetly urge that young lady to please make an appointment with a medical physician as soon as possible? Or do you fear that any such unsolicited advice from you might be emotionally devastating to that young woman, which might then trigger possible suicidal tendencies in herself?

---Your Majesty, at the risk of posing an offensive question, I feel compelled to ask you whether you can recall any case during your reign in which a citizen of The United Kingdom commited suicide within 48 hours or two weeks after speaking with you in person? If there ever was any such reported case during the period since you assumed the throne in 1952, how did you respond to that tragic news? Did it prompt you to strive to be all the more polite and as tactful and gracious and constructive as possible in all of your own comments that you made in person to the young ladies of Great Britain?--

---Your Majesty, would you support the establishment in your country of a Queen Elizabeth II Institute for Suicide Prevention?

---Have you taken a personal interest in keeping up with statistics on the percentage of British female youths and British women under age 30, in particular, who are themselves addicted to marijuana or cocaine or any other illicit drug? Do you believe that the British Government has done enough in the way of offering adequate drug-treatment programs or female British youths and others?

--Your Majesty, do you sometimes sense an element of complacency or smugness about illicit drug or alcohol addiction on the part of your subjects on The United Kingdom? Do you observed that many subjects of yours in The United Kingdom attempt to deflect discussions about the per-capita incidence of alcohol-addiction or illicit-drug addiction in your own nation by declaring, "This problem of widespread inebriation is more of an Irish problem than a British problem; we're very fortunate that way, and thank God we are not Ireland!" or by declaring, "Widespread illicit-drug addiction is more of an American problem than a British problem. We in Britain are very fortunate that we are NOT the USA!"

----Your Majesty, you may be aware that adult American citizens visiting retail stores in the United States for many years have been given the option of purchasing a brand of cigarettes bearing the name of "Parliament." Do you find it dismaying that the tobacco industry in the United States has exploited the admirable and honorable name of your nation's chief governing body in that shameless manner? Would you like to see the British Parliament approve a resolution demanding that the United States Government require that Parliament cigarettes be renamed immediately?

---Your Majesty, has it disappointed you to sense that the percentage of British citizens and American citizens who consume tobacco products, whether that be pipe tobacco, snuff tobacco, or tobacco cigarettes, remains alarmingly high? Would you like to see the British Government and the American government, for that matter, offer more in the way of tobacco-addiction treatment programs?

----Your Majesty, some observers of modern life have pointed out that pursuing benevolence and good deeds these days often entails becoming an active member of a community opposed to something in very emphatic terms. I am referring, of course, to the admirable anti-drug community, the noble anti-tobacco community, the virtuous anti-alcohol community, the anti-tattoo community, the anti-facial-hair community, the anti-AIDs or AIDS-prevention community, the anti-STD or STD-prevention community, the anti-unwanted pregnancy community, the anti-pederasty or anti-pedaphilia community, the anti-child-abuse community, the anti-intergenerational-exploitation community, the anti-spouse-abuse-community, the anti-profanity community, the anti-sadomasochism or anti-S&M community, the anti-stalking community, the anti-crime crime-prevention community, the anti-complicity-in-crime community, the anti-homicide community and anti-attempted-homicide community, the anti-noise-pollution community, the anti-verbal-harassment community, the anti-slavery community, the anti-compelled-speech community, the anti-brainwashing community, the anti-censorship community, the anti-fraudulent-communications community, and the anti-anonymous-communications community. Of these communities in opposition to a societal malaise that I have just cited, is there any particular "anti-community," if you will, that you personally admire the most?

----Your Majesty, much has been said in the United States of America about the flagrant and shocking intolerance of a cited minority group or a cited subculture toward the asserted legal and Constitutional right of an American citizen who is NOT an alcoholic, for instance, to himself associate with other non-alcoholic persons, or the asserted legal right of a lifelong abstainer from tobacco products in the United States, to himself associate with other lifelong abstainers from tobacco products, or the legal right of a law-abiding American citizen with no criminal-conviction record (myself, for instance), to himself associate with other law-abiding American citizens who have no criminal-conviction record. Do you believe that The United Kingdom does a better job than the United States at protecting an individual's legal right to set his own priorities in his life, and to himself enjoy full freedom of Association accordingly that involve strictly-mutual-consent cases of in-person association with that individual?

---Your Majesty, the Bataan Death March on the Pacific Islands that Imperial Japan subjected British and American soldiers to during World War II has long been a source of indignation and outrage for many Americans. One follow-up question: Are you yourself aware of any also-outrageous attempted counterpart or actual counterpart to a Bataan Death March occurring in or that has occurred in 21st Century America or anywhere in a British Commonwealth nation? Have you pursued any actions to yourself personally oppose any such attempted or actual counterpart to the infamous Bataan Death March that has itself occurred in modern times?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have received intelligence reports throughout yoru reign which have indicated that many of your country's rock musicians and entertainers, in particular, have ties to the illicit-drug underworld. Sid Vicious of the "Sex Pistols" punk rock group comes to mind as having been particularly notorious that way. Have you ever considered asking the British Government to please strive to more closely monitor any and all evidence of illicit-drug activities by musicians and entertainers and actors who are citizens of Great Britain, any such surveillance of those musicians and entertainers and actors being based on the premise that they greatly influence the entire reputation of Great Britain and The United Kingdom in the eyes of the entire world. Would a British Government-sponsored Sting Operation for musicians such as Sid Vicious, for instance, possibly have been helpful toward successful criminal-law prosecution of Sid Vicious at an earlier point in his life, along with accompanying drug-treatment programs for Sid Vicious, that would have been initiated by the British Government?

---Your Majesty, it occurs to me now that you must have heard speculation by some Christians in Great Britain, and possibly by some members of the Anglican Church that you preside over, that the British citizen punk-rock star Sid Vicious was, in fact, "The Anti-Christ." Did you yourself ever agree with any such Christian evaluations of Sid Vicious?

--Your Majesty, would you ever request to have a special meeting with any citizen of Great Britain whom you suspected of being sinister, but whom you wanted to meet in person in order to be completely sure of that critical impression of yours---and possibly to also attempt to yourself encourage that individual to strive for benevolence in the present and future. To name an example of this, during the 1970s did you ever consider inviting the punk rock star Sid Vicious, a subject of yours, to have a personal meeting with you at Buckingham Palace or Windsor Castle?

---Your Majesty, if you were asked to cite the name of the current drug-treatment or alcohol-treatment program sponsored by the British Government that you regard as being the most successful, which program would you praise as being the very best?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must vividly recall the personal crisis that First Lady Betty Ford, the wife of American President Gerald Ford, endured in the
1970s from her addiction to licit drugs. Do you yourself sometimes suspect that in the context of 21st Century Great Britain, licit-drug addiction by affluent women of today is more widespread than most British citizens might believe.

--As you must be very aware, Your Majesty, much of what your British Government is seeking to accomplish conflicts with the policies of one nearby country, The Netherlands, where from what I understand it is legal for anyone in the Netherlands to consume any illicit drug or engage in sexual prostitution, for instance. Have you seen any evidence that the policies of The Netherlands have undermined your ability to preside over moral and proper and honorable lifestyles by all Britons?

---Your Majesty, it seems very likely that you have been alarmed by what I'm assuming has been a sizable recent increase in travel expenses for Scotland Yard as investigators for that British law-enforcement agency in recent years have no doubt been making frequent trips to The Netherlands at British Government expense. Those official trips, presumably, are primarily occurring in the context of Scotland Yard investigating an illicit-drug operation or an illicit prostitution operation in which one or more British citizens or residents of Great Britain is either a reported victim of that operation or is an alleged collaborator or conspirator with that Dutch operation. Do you believe that the Dutch Government should be asked by the British Government to financially compensate Great Britain and The United Kingdom for what have no doubt been increased criminal-law investigation and prosecution expenses that your anti-drug and anti-prostitution nation has incurred because of the Dutch Government's intransigence in those areas?

---Your Majesty, in your role as head of the Anglican Church and The United Kingdom, do you have any reason to suspect that any of the Scotland Yard investigators who have visited The Netherlands in recent years in pursuit of a criminal-law probe have possibly accepted bribes of some type from the illicit drug underworld or from the illicit prostitution underworld in The Netherlands?

----Are you, in fact, satisfied that the internal-affairs unit of Scotland Yard has conducted and is conducting adequate investigations of any and all Scotland Yard detectives to ensure that no Scotland Yard investigator visiting The Netherlands is ever himself or herself compromised in any way in his or her pursuit of any crime cases in The Netherlands?

--Your Majesty, based on intelligence reports available to yourself, do you have any reason to suspect or believe that the incidence of sexual prostitution in Great Britain has increased in the time period since The Netherlands and Germany legalized sexual prostitution? Is there a risk, in short, of a growing permissiveness toward prostitution within your own country, influenced in part by the trend that way in The Netherlands and Germany?

----Your Majesty, would you support a proposed public event for your country in which either Prince William or Prince Harry would be asked by the British Government to himself visit a "House of Good Repute," so to speak-----a highly-rated residential treatment program in Great Britain where former sexual prostitutes of your country are being provided with free lodging and meals and a multi-faceted treatment program designed to help them phase into an honorable career that is law-abiding and creative and good for their own medical and emotional health.

---Your Majesty, do you believe it would be proper and helpful to your entire country if a very distinguished member of your Royal Family were to himself or herself, with full personal protection from Scotland Yard escorts, pay a well-publicized and humanitarian visit to a house of prostitution in your country, in order to himself or herself express concern about the well-being of the ladies employed there in that illicit and injurious context for themselves?

---Your Majesty, of all the current opponents of sexual prostitution who are British citizens, is there any subject of yours who has particularly impressed you with their eloquence, incisiveness, intellect, courage, kindness, civility, and obedience of the law? Do you believe that admirable individual should be specially honored or rewarded by the British Government? Would you support the conferment of an annual award in Great Britain upon the British citizen who in the most recent 12-month period contributed the most toward opposing sexual prostitution and sexual trafficking in your great European nation?

---Your Majesty, it must be rather painful to you if you happen to learn that an American tourist in your country, as his very first request upon landing at Heathrow Airport, asked a tour guide in London to please escort that tourist to the "Jack the Ripper Museum." As I'm sure you must be very aware from your study of English history, Jack the Ripper reportedly stalked and and brutally murdered female sexual prostitutes. Despite this, many Americans, if polled on the subject, would no doubt rank Jack the Ripper among the 10 most intriguing figures from British history. Do you believe that the current historical museums in London through their permanent exhibits adequately convey the deplorably violent nature of Jack the Ripper?

---Your Majesty, would you like to see the British Government spend any money to conduct DNA testing and other research, if possible, that might help to unmask the actual identity of Jack the Ripper? Or do you regard that histrical question as being unworthy of any expenditure of government funds, at this point in the 21st Century.

---Your Majesty, are you routinely and automatically provided with official statistics on the current percentage of all your subjects in each nation you preside over, who themselves have ever been convicted of a felony crime?

---Your Majesty, have you yourself ever chosen to file a criminal-law charge through Scotland Yard or some other law-enforcement agency against any individual or group of individuals? Do you sense that the vast majority of British ladies would be unwilling to press charges against a criminal suspect who had victimized them?

---Of the many reasons which might explain why British women, in particular, might choose not to press criminal-law charges against a suspect who had allegedly violated their own legal rights, do you sense that fear of being subjected to sensational publicity and notoriety in the Fleet Street tabloids ranks near the top of those reasons?

---When you reflect on the role of rehabilitation programs throughout The United Kingdom in helping to deter recidivism by convicted criminals, does any particular rehabition program serving convicted criminals impress you as having had the finest record of long-term success?

--Your Majesty, it seems likely that the unwanted pregnancy rate among teenage British citizens is significantly lower than the unwanted pregnancy rate among teenage American citizens. Are you currently satisfied with the current unwanted teenage pregnancy rate in Great Britain, or would you like to see stronger, expanded, education programs for all teenage Britons that will remind each male Briton, for instance, how to properly wear a condom, if I might speak very candidly about what is no doubt one of the major issues in unwanted-pregnancy prevention in your country.

--Your Majesty, would you like to see the Church of England do more to offer instruction to young persons in your country about contraception techniques and methods and options?

---We have all heard about the alarming tendency toward promiscuity and indiscriminate sexual activity throughout western nations such as the United States and Great Britain. What percentage of all British single or married persons of today would you describe as being "oversexed" or "promiscuous," in your view? Do you have a strong sense of how to identify an oversexed or promiscuous British citizen, based on your own religious and political beliefs?

---Your Majesty, are you dismayed by the implicitly or explicitly conveyed view of some Englishmen that the primary expected lifetime accomplishment of one cited female human being or another in your country is "her ability to serve as a fine receptacle for my male organ in the bedroom," with "my own orgasmic eruption into her body being my primary means of praising her."

--To what extent, if any, do you blame American society and media companies based in The United States for spawning a possible increase in the incidence of sexual promiscuity, or indiscriminate carnal relations, by British citizens on the British Isles?

---In fairness, Your Majesty, two of the most internationally publicized motion-picture characters actually identified on the screen with Great Britain, and I'm referring of course to James Bond, the secret agent, and to Austin Powers, a crime-fighting protagonist, are each depicted in the cinema as being philandering playboys who are determined to be always adding to their list of ladies whom they have entertained in the boudoir. Does it pose a concern to you, Your Majesty, to yourself sense that movie viewers the world over may associate otherwise-heroic British men from the cinema with a complete incapacity for an in-depth and lasting sexual romantic relationship involving any female mutual-consent romantic partner in particular. I raise this question because it seems that chivalry in modern British men, as defined by James Bond and Austin Powers movies, does not extend into honorable conduct and valor in romantic relationships. This leaves the impression to many movie viewers that British men at their finest and most heroic can also be described as nobly sophomoric.

---If a young woman in your country has lost her virginity before she gets married, do you still believe she should have the option of wearing a white wedding dress at her wedding ceremony?

--When you observe a young woman in The United Kingdom who at age 16, for instance, has had herself tattooed, does this ever pose a concern to you? Do you believe that citizens of Great Britain should be forbidden from ever getting tattooed on their body until they reach age 21, say?

---Your Majesty, there must be occasions when one of your female subjects, a British girl or British woman, candidly comments to you that she feels she is too homely and plain-looking to ever attract a suitable mutual-consent marriage partner. Do you ever attempt to offer words of reassurance to a female subject of yours with a complaint or concern of that type? For instance, do you ever volunteer to her that your grandmother, Queen Victoria, was not herself noted for physical beauty per se, but still ended up as one of the leading mother figures of world history.

--Your Majesty, have you as Head of the Church of England ever been asked to comment on whether nostril rings or tongue rings or tongue or nostril piercings are, in your view, in conflict with the teachings of the Anglican religion? Do you, in fact, believe nostril rings, tongue rings, or body piercings to be offensive and in conflict with your Christian religion?

---Your Majesty, in your role as Chief of State of The United Kingdom and Head of the Anglican Church, would you like to see an annual tradition develop in which a portion of the member donations from at least one church service each year might go toward helping to prevent child abuse and spouse abuse in Great Britain?

--Of all the movies and television shows you have watched or heard about that featured a benevolent Father figure and a benevolent Mother figure in Great Britain, which movie or TV show was the most successful from that standpoint? I raise this question because, as I'm sure you might heartily agree, the values celebrated by arts and entertainment productions, and by art and the media in general, for that matter, pervasively influence the values of your subjects.

---Your Majesty, is it your view that Prince Charles is the leading Father figure in Great Britain at this time? How would you evaluate your son, Prince Charles, in that societal role? Do you sometimes wish that he might smile a bit more often?

---Your Majesty, in your role as Head of the Anglican Church you have of course had many opportunities for pondering the expected afterlife of your many millions of subjects. Would you be willing to state at this time what percentage of all British citizens of today you yourself currently believe to be destined for Heaven, or a favorable future, upon their death?

---Your Majesty, your own only minimal usage of facial make-up sets you apart from many British women and many American women of British ancestry. Do you ever find yourself expressing concern about women, and particularly the younger women, who wear heavy make-up? Which particular types of concerns come to mind for you in regard to heavy make-up usage by many British women and many American women of British ancestry.

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have heard the old saying that English parents for whichever reason traditionally rely on Irish-born nannies to raise those English parents' own children. Do you have any reason to believe that English nannies, Scottish nannies, and Northern Irish nannies have possibly been underestimated?

---Your Majesty, do you regard it as at all ironic that while England and Ireland have traditionally been in cultural and religious conflict with each other, English parents have customarily hired a nanny from Ireland and entrusted that Irish woman with the rearing of those English parents' own children. Was there a cultural schizophrenia from it all, in your view, this tendency of so many English parents to trust a woman in the role of nanny who was herself born in the very nation that the English have traditionally denounced with the most dramatic fervor?

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you must have many occasions when you observe a British girl or young British woman age 30 or younger ---or a British gentleman age 30 or younger, for that matter --- whom you believe has apparently suffered very severely and without herself being blameworthy. Does the British Government currently permit you on your own initiative to invite that young British person to visit you for tea, your hope being that you might help to inspire that individual to feel optimistic and cheerful about their own future.

---Your Majesty, you must have met thousands of children and young persons under age 30 whom you suspected at the time of being victims of child abuse or extreme cruelty by others. As the ruling Queen presiding over all of your countrymen, did you ever wish that you could officially or unofficially adopt children and other young persons, or at least personally yourself help each of them to have a very successful first 30 years of life?

---Your Majesty, it must cause deep sorrow for you when you reflect on the many current parents of Great Britain who, because of those parents' own personal addiction to illicit drugs or licit drugs, alcohol, tobacco, or to gambling or betting on horse races, fail themselves to spend adequate amounts of money toward addressing their own children's needs. This form of addiction-related child abuse on the British Isles must be particularly sobering to you. Your Majesty, have you obtained a recent estimate from the British Government on the percentage of all British parents currently raising or helping to raise youths inside their own home, or offspring of theirs under age 30, who have themselves neglected their own children because of a cited addiction by that parent to drugs, alcohol, tobacco, gambling, or betting on horse races. Do you believe there is a need for a special new British Government-sponsored national survey of British parents that might provide you with an estimate of the percentage of all British households with at least one young person under age 30 residing there for at least two months of 2008, for instance, in which at least one legal guardian inside that household suffers from any of these clearly injurious addictions.

---Your Majesty, one of your country's longtime allies, the United States, has a tradition of honorable youths being invited to serve as "Mayor for the Day," "Senator for the Day," or "Governor for the Day," for instance. The intent of that annual ceremonial event is to promote ambition and a dedication to leadership in American youths who qualify for that honor. In your country, The United Kingdom, would you support the idea of a comparable "Queen for the Day" honor being bestowed on a female British youth whom you yourself particularly admire? I am referring, of course, to one day of each year being officially dedicated to a qualifying female British youth unofficially presiding over all of The United Kingdom on your behalf, with yourself offering her polite guidance on how to rule successfully as Queen.

---Your Majesty, in view of the many adult British citizens age 30 or younger who appear to be experiencing a tragic personal crisis of one type or another, would you like to see the British Government establish a special At-Risk Assistance Program aimed at generously helping any and all adult British citizens under age 30 who each appear to be at risk of developing an addiction to, or who appear to be on the brink of, involvement with organized crime; violent conduct; attempted or actual suicide; anorexia; bulimia; illicit drugs, licit drugs, alcohol, tobacco products, extensive tatooing of their own bodies, rampant sexual promiscuity (so much so that they can barely remember the first names of any of their most recent sex partners or romantic partners), sadomasochism involving the physically observable beating or whipping of themselves or their "romantic" partner; or sexual prostitution.

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you must vividly recall the very bad reputation that your entire nation received this century when the globally-admired teenage male star of the Harry Potter fictional movie series was reportedly stabbed to death in your country by another teenage person, if I remember correctly. When violence occurs in your country, do you ever find yourself wondering whether your citizenry have been corrupted by watching too many violence-plagued Hollywood movies or listening to an excessive amount of violent song lyrics that were imported from the United States? Do you, in fact, blame the United States and the pervasive global influence of American popular culture when teenage violence occurs in Great Britain.

---As Head of the Anglican religion, do you ever have a sense of an "Anti-Christ" figure being present in any foreign nation? Do any Americans of today ever call to mind for you an "Anti-Christ" figure? Or does your Anglican religion devote much thought to the "Anti-Christ" theme, along with the country or countries where any such anti-Christ figures might dwell at present?

---In your role as Head of the Church of England, what do you currently regard as the leading reason why any given member of your religious denomination would fail, on any given Sunday, to attend an Anglican church service?

--Have you been impressed by the caliber of locution and public speaking by 21st Century Britons who are under age 30, say? Do you believe the British Government should do more to promote first-rate locution in Great Britain on the part of all Britons under age 30?

--Your Majesty, have you ever been acquainted with any British citizen of cockney heritage who, with help from first-rate speech instruction programs in your country, was able to master Queen's English? In the best of all possible worlds, would you like to see The United Kingdom be a nation where all of your citizens have mastered and are fluent in Queen's English?

---Your Majesty, it is well known that your father, King George VI, during his youth in England greatly improved his own speech and locution with help from an Australian speech therapist. Would you like to see an annual King George VI Award offered to an intellectually-motivated and civic-minded British youth who has a stammer or other major speech impediment, with that award providing that British youth with free and first-rate speech-therapy or locution-assistance services on a multi-year basis?

---Your Majesty, have you yourself generally felt a special fondness for Australia that was based on the many stories your father no doubt told you during your youth about how invaluable the Australian speech therapist had been for your father during your father's childhood. I pose this question because it seems likely that whenever you visited Australia during your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom and British Commonwealth, you found yourself smiling to sense that your beloved father had been generously befriended by a kindly Australian citizen..

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you remember the world-famous 1960s musical movie "My Fair Lady," that was based on the theater play, "Pygmalion," by George Bernard Shaw. In "My Fair Lady," a professor of linguistics in London who is portrayed by Rex Harrison, attempts to teach a flower-girl from the lower classes how to speak proper Queen's English. That movie has since reminded me to ask you whether you have identified any type of gender gap in your country in the percentage of all British men who speak proper Queen's English, when compared with the percentage of all British women who do. Does it appear to you that in 21st Century Great Britain, a higher percentage of all British men than of all British women, actually speak proper Queen's English. Or is it, in fact, the other way around, in your view?

--Have you considered appointing a "British Locution Chief" who would preside over and monitor locution by all British citizens? What percentage of Britons of today speak the proper Queen's English, would you estimate, and how would that percentage compare with 10 or 20 or 50 years ago?

---Your Majesty, many Americans look upon the British as being intolerant toward law-abiding forms of diversity in human speech and locution. Those same Americans might point out that the English, for instance, historically have balked at the dialect of the citizens of Ireland, with the British reportedly labeling that Irish brogue as "coarse and uncultured," if I remember correctly the traditional English complaint about Irish citizens' style of speaking. Your Majesty, do you yourself disagree with this widely-held American impression of the English as being "speech and locution snobs"?

--Of the movie actors and movie actresses who are British and who appear in Hollywood movies being watched by Americans, which actor or actors or actress or actresses of today speak proper Queen's English? I raise that question because I'm sure that many Americans would not know the answer to that question.

---Your Majesty, when you reflect on what proper Queen's English consists of, are you also thinking of it in terms of full voice intonation or voice modulation? I raise this question because it often seems as if there has been a rather dreary trend toward monotonic, lackluster, speaking styles in the modern era. Do you believe that the locution-education programs throughout Great Britain should assign even greater importance than they currently do to promoting vocal intonation and voice modulation?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very aware that American men and Australian men have traditionally exhibited a certain degree of disdain and skepticism toward the level of masculinity of Englishmen, in particular. It often seems as if the vast majority of all American men and of all Australian men look upon Englishmen as being somewhat effeminate, somewhat intellectual-elitist, and lacking in muscularity. What is your own impression of this perception on the part of the vast majority of all American men and all Australian men? Or perhaps my question should be: Is there, in fact, an Anti-Masculinity and Anti-Muscularity or Anti-Athleticism societal malaise found in most Englishmen of the 21st Century?

---Your Majesty, do you generally prefer the fictional movies being produced in Great Britain over the fictional Hollywood movies being produced in the United States? In which ways, if any, do you yourself find the American-made movies to be offensive---vulgar and obscene or excessively violent or anti-religious, for instance---or substandard, non-substantive, and lacking in philosophical depth?

--Many people have no doubt commented on the first-rate locution and eloquence exhibited by many Britons of African ancestry. Do you believe that British society and the British Government offer superior speech-education programs for Britons of African ancestry, in particular, than does the United States for Americans of African ancestry.

---Your Majesty, many observers of Great Britain maintain that your nation fails to adequately promote upward mobility on the part of the cockneys of your country and other traditionally under-educated subpopulations. Can you cite some examples of British citizens of cockney heritage who managed to raise their socioeconomic status through industriousness and idealism and zeal and self-education? Is there any currently living British citizen of cockney heritage whom you would be pleased to see become a member of the British Parliament?

---We have all heard about the so-called Untouchables of India of an earlier era. If you were to identify any comparable subpopulation or subculture of Britons of today whom you believe are unfairly treated like "untouchable" societal pariahs by the vast majority of all British citizens of today, would that subpopulation or subculture be the cockneys, in your view, or would that subculture instead be Britons of Arab ancestry---or possibly some other subculture?

--In view of the historic ostracism of British citizens of cockney heritage, would you support the commissioning by the British Government of a modern sociological study involving a series of oral history interviews of British citizens of cockney heritage or ancestry. I pose this question because it seems to me that many conscientious Britons would regard those oral history interview videotapes or audiotapes as poignant and sobering. Those interview audiotapes might also greatly enrich the scope and range of sociological inquiry on the British Isles---or do you agree with that outlook, Your Majesty?

---Your Majesty, can you imagine a circumstance of 21st Century Great Britain in which you yourself might ever choose to knight a gentleman of cockney heritage or ancestry? Do you believe that that public knighting of a cockney gentleman by yourself would help to promote greater societal stature for and upward mobility for cockney Britons?

---Do you agree with those who say that American society is more meritocratic than British society, since a person who is born into a low-income household in the USA presumably has a better chance at later becoming a professionally employed individual than would a British person of comparable background. Or do you regard that as an unfair criticism of British society?

--Have you ever heard any recommendation or suggestion on how to cure Great Britain of what many have no doubt referred to as the Profane Speech Crisis on the British Isles?

---On the subject of epithets, by the way, have you yourself ever once heard or overheard a foreign citizen shouting or stating "Hey, Limey!" to one of your country's citizens? Do you recall how you reacted or responded during that awkward moment for you and your countryman? I raise these two questions because it must feel rather degrading to a male adult British citizen for him to hear a foreigner address himself as "Limey." Or do you yourself agree that "Limey" is am offensive slang term when that term is used to refer to British citizens?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you are aware that many Americans, from what I have observed, habitually refer to citizens of your British Commonwealth nation of Canada as "Canucks." Do you regard that slang term for Canadians as more pejorative, or less pejorative, than the slang term "Limeys" in reference to British citizens.

---Your Majesty, in your reign as Queen, it must have upset you on occasion to hear or overhear one of your British subjects refer to Frenchmen as "Frogs," or possibly by some other unflattering epithet. Do you recall ever reprimanding or criticizing a British citizen for using a derogatory label to refer to citizens of France?

---Your Majesty, you must have many awkward moments in which you are glancing at or speaking in person to one of your subjects, and you suddenly observe that he or she in your presence desperately attempts to conceal from you a profane or obscene tattoo on his or her arm or neck or leg. Do you ever make a comment to that individual about his or her earnest attempt to conceal from you any evidence of that profane speech tattoo on his or her body? For instance, are you ever tempted to say, "Wouldn't it be better not to have a tattoo on your body that causes you shame and disgrace when you are in the presence of your Queen?"

---Are there certain types of profane or violently-worded musical recordings or profane or violent movies being produced in The United States and other foreign nations that you would like to see the British Parliament ban from the British Isles?

---Your Majesty, I must ask you if you would be willing to offer your own evaluation at this time about the Beatles's contribution to the popular culture of The United Kingdom. What did you admire the most about the Beatles rock group? Did you sense, for instance, that the Beatles helped to enhance the public image of the city of Liverpool, England?

---In your regal role as Head of State throughout the entire multi-decade time period in which the Beatles rock group unofficially reigned worldwide, did you ever feel that you had been put in the very awkward position of having to compete with the Beatles in order to yourself attract attention from the British people when you spoke publicly or attended a public event.

---To follow up on that last question: Do you recall whether you ever joked, or did any member of your Royal Family or any of your advisers ever jestingly comment to you, that perhaps you should purchase an electric guitar and hold it in front of you in order to yourself claim as many listeners and television viewers as the Beatles did during that time period.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that a significant percentage of all British people of today devote an excessive amount of their time to listening to music? Do you worry that many of your subjects of the 21st Century are, in fact, addicted to music, that addiction being unhealthy to their moral and intellectual lives as well as to their hearing capacity and medical health and emotional health.

---Your Majesty, would you favor the establishment of a "Queen Elizabeth II Center for the Treatment of Musical Addiction"? I am referring to an unhealthy over-consumption by many 21st Century British citizens of what amounts to jarring noise pollution in the guise of music. It often seems tragically masochistic, in fact, on the part of headset wearers who appear to never get enough of their so-called "daily music fix."

---Your Majesty, I don't know whether you have been asked this question before, but many of your admirers are no doubt curious to know which, if any, of the Beatles songs is your personal favorite. Is there any Rolling Stones song, for that matter, that you personally like or admire?

---Many people assume that you yourself rarely, if ever, listen to non-classical music. Is that impression accurate? When you do listen to non-classical or modern music, which genres of music and which musical performers most appeal to you?

---Your Majesty, it must be a source of concern to you to sense that a certain percentage of all your subjects, and I don't know what that percentage would be, routinely make a point of themselves ignoring your own public statements and public preachments. Do you sense that the percentage of Britons who largely ignore you and your public comments has increased, decreased, or remained about the same in the time period since you assumed the throne in the early 1950s?

--There must be some ardent fans of The Rolling Stones rock group who had hoped that Mick Jagger would eventually be knighted, and become Sir Jagger. Was there any such request of you at any time that you consider knighting Mick Jagger? If so, what was your response to that request?


---As I'm sure you must be painfully aware, many observers of The Rolling Stones and Mick Jagger regard that rock music group---and many others from Great Britain, I might add----as exhibiting a contempt for platonic personal relationships. One famous Rolling Stone song, for instance, boldly states that Japanese women have an insatiable appetite for experiencing carnal relations with men throughout the night. Your Majesty, does it pose a concern to you that so much of the modern popular culture in your country appears to ridicule the very idea that personal relationships that involve affection or love can be strictly platonic in nature?

--Your Majesty, you must be very concerned about the dearth of world-famous actors and entertainers and singers and artists in Great Britain these days who are world-renowned for their wholesome idealism, civility and obedience of the law, and restraint around alcohol as well as tobacco. Back in the 1970s, for instance, the teenage English actress Hailey Mills delighted many people in the United States with her wholesome, idealistic, clean-talking, enterprising sense of adventure. Do you believe the British Government should do more than it currently does to honor and reward wholesome and idealistic British citizens who also happen to be fine actors, entertainers, singers, artists, or writers.

----I'm sure you are familiar with the tender platonic love relationship in the 1950s and early 1960s between Eleanor Roosevelt, the widow of the late U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt, and former Illinois Governor Adlai Stevenson. From what you have observed in your own life, which platonic personal relationships between a man and a woman have struck you as being the most impressively heartfelt and beneficial for both the man and the woman in that platonic personal relationship?

---Her Majesty, I hope you won't mind my also asking you an inevitable follow-up question: In your own life, with which man or male youth not related to you have you had the most enjoyable and heartfelt and inspirational platonic personal relationship?

--As you must be painfully aware, many observers of the punk rock movement, myself among them, regard Great Britain to be partly blameworthy for having originated that reckless and violent and pervasively injurious movement. Looking back, was there anything that you believe the British Government should have done to prevent the exportation of the punk rock societal malaise, as you no doubt yourself regard that movement.

--Do you today regard the Punk Rock Movement as having been Great Britain's most disastrous gift, if you will, to the entire world?

---When you reflect on the various manufactured goods and services and cultural innovations that Great Britain has "exported" to other nations at any time during your multi-decade tenure as the reigning Head of State of The United Kingdom, which items, services, or innovations do you feel particularly proud of?

--As you must be very aware, the nation of Norway is one of your next-door neighbors, so to speak. Do you believe The United Kingdom should do more than it currently does to promote Anglo-Norwegian cultural interchange and dialogue? Would you support the idea of an annual Norwegian Cultural Festival in Great Britain each year?

---Of the foreign countries situated closest to Great Britain, which foreign nation do you currently believe to hold the greatest promise in the near future for dramatic improvement in British foreign relations with that nation? Would that foreign country be France, Ireland, Norway, Iceland, Germany, Belgium, The Netherlands, or Denmark?

---Of the various nations of Europe, which one nation other than Great Britain do you believe has been underestimated the most extensively and ignored or neglected or dismissed as inconsequential in the most unfair manner? Would that European nation be Ireland, Luxembourg, Belgium, Norway, The Netherlands, Denmark, Finland, Latvia, Poland, Hungary, Austria, Switzerland, Sweden, Greece, Albania, Italy, or some other European nation?

--Much has been said about the relationship between The United Kingdom and the Republic of Ireland. Would you characterize that relationship of today as more harmonious than you have ever witnessed in prior decades? Do you believe there's a need for an annual Anglo-Irish Cultural festival that celebrates friendship between The United Kingdom and Ireland?

--Your Majesty, do you happen to recall any recent live-theater play performance in your country that depicted English characters who are British citizens having a harmonious relationship with Irish charaters who are Irish citizens?

--Do you subscribe to the view that England and Ireland cannot ever be fully harmonious and mutually-appreciative with each other until the playwrights and novelists and poets of England and Ireland through their fictional writings describe a world in which that type of admirable societal harmony between England and Ireland occurs?

----Your Majesty, Would you support the establishment of an annual literary prize and accompanying financial award to the writer of any citizenship whose work of fiction most convincingly depicts Irish people and English people having harmonious relations with one another?>

---Your Majesty, do you believe that The United Kingdom and The Republic of Ireland could or should do more than they currently do in the way of mutual-defense treaties?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be painfully aware of the traditional American stereotype about the people of your one bordering nation----and I'm referring, of course, to the Republic of Ireland. According to that American stereotype, Ireland is a nation of colorfully superstitious and violence-prone drunkards who are eternally hoping that "luck" of some type will save their own nation from a future potato famine, or some counterpart to a potato famine. When you reflect on the beliefs and conduct of your own subjects, have you identified in the British people any comparable stereotypes of this nature about the Irish people? Have you considered asking the British Government to establish an Institute for the Study of Ireland that might sponsor helpful and constructive sociological research about the people of Ireland?

---Are you personal friends with the Irish woman who recently served as the chief of state of the Republic of Ireland? If so, have you been disappointed by the lack of favorable media coverage about your possible personal friendship with that female political leader in the one foreign nation situated in the British Isles.

---Of the various women who have been voting members of the British Parliament, which woman or women of today or of a prior decade have or has impressed you the most?

---Do you wish that the American colonists' rebellion in what is now the United States had never occurred? Had The United Kingdom continued to govern the American colonies, what do you believe would have happened?

---Of all the former colonies of The United Kingdom, which nation other than The United States, currently has the most harmonious and mutually-beneficial relationship with The United Kingdom?

--Are there any current territories or nations of The United Kingdom that you would like to see being elevated in stature and political status to that of Wales or Scotland, for instance? Would you like to see the the British Virgin Islands or the Falkland Islands, for instance, each elect a representative of their own to Parliament who would himself or herself represent the British Virgin Islands or the Falkland Islands during Parliamentary debates and Parliamentary actions?

---It must be very saddening to you to note the threat to civil dialogue and negotiation that is posed by the global terrorism crisis at present. Your Majesty, are you concerned that the very ability of political conflicts to be resolved through civil and polite discussion and negotiation, has been permanently undermined by the trend toward anonymous threats of violence and spontaneous eruptions of suicide bombings inflicted on civilians of all ages as well as military officers.

---Your Majesty, do you agree with those who say that the national security of a country is greatly enhanced when that country's conduct and policies are, in fact, morally defensible. I raise this question partly because I sense that it must be very morale-lifting to soldiers, for instance, when they feel completely confident that the nation they are serving and representing on the battlefield is morally righteous and just and benevolent. I also sense that if a nation is conscientious and moral and benevolent toward its own citizenry and toward other nations of the world during peacetime, this will significantly boost that nation's standing and its ability to forge military alliances with other countries during wartime.

--Your Majesty, do you believe there to be a need for a worldwide education program aimed at teaching young persons throughout the world of the value of sitting down at a negotiating table and rationally attempting to resolve a political conflict? If so, do you see a need for establishment a possible new civic group or philanthropy group dedicated to teaching the art of dialogue and mediation and negotiation to as many young persons as possible?

--In view of alarming evidence that the United States of America and American society are responsible for the vast majority of the Global Warming Effect and accompanying environmental catastrophes occurring worldwide, has this changed your own outlook toward the United States in any way?

---To what extent do you blame the United States for promoting and spawning urban sprawl as a a form of "urban development" that has played a nefarious and insidious role in the worldwide Global Warming Effect crisis?

--Is urban sprawl a problem anywhere in Great Britain, from what you have observed? Have you been favorably impressed by Parliament's response to any such cases of energy-wasteful and environmentally destructive and unsightly urban sprawl that have been identified in your Northern European country?

--Your Majesty, I'm sure you are very mindful of the fact that some Americans habitually describe London as being a "filthy" city, in the view of those Americans. I shall never forget the vividly verbalized attack on London that an American citizen recently chose to share with me on his own volition in the Austin area of Texas. That American citizen also told me that the cities of Germany, in contrast to Great Britain, are phenomenally clean, that American stated. Of the various cities of Great Britain, which city do you believe has the most urgent need for an extreme make-over that would clean up that city and significantly reduce air pollution levels there.

---Of the various major cities of Great Britain of today, which one city do you believe to be the most friendly toward the environment and the cleanest and tidiest overall?

---In 1990 or 1991, I spoke with a European citizen in west Texas who volunteered to me that everyday living in Great Britain is pervasively undermined by the rustiness of the pipes in buildings, that European citizen said. His comment has suggested a follow-up question. Do you believe there to be a need for a "Nationwide Rusty Pipes Inventory" for all of Great Britain that would be aimed at replacing any and all rusty, substandard pipes in the buildings of Great Britain with pipes that are first-rate?

---One related question that comes to mind for me at this time is simply this: Would you as Queen of England like to see a lot more money allotted than at present for refurbishing, upgrading, and improving the infrastructure throughout The United Kingdom?

--Do you currently look upon The United States of America as being the best friend to The United Kingdom from among all of the non-Commonwealth nations?

---Your Majesty, when you reflect on the various personal marriages that have occurred between British citizens and American citizens, is there any marriage that you now believe was a particularly successful matrimonial match?
I raise this question partly because, as we know from modern British history, the planned 1930s marriage between a reigning uncle of yours, King Edward VIII, and a female American socialite--a Mrs. Simpson---was considered quite scandalous in your country, and prompted your uncle's abdication from the throne in 1936.

---Your Majesty, did you personally admire and like Hollywood actor Cary Grant? Did you regard him as being more English than American, or was it the other way around? I raise this question because Cary Grant is famous in part for being the offspring of a mixed marriage, so to speak----between an English citizen and an American citizen.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that Sir Winston Churchill was a greater political leader for your country partly because through his biological parents he had both an English and an American heritage?

---Your Majesty, is there any particular U.S. state you look upon as being the most similar to Great Britain, and on that basis earns the greatest admiration and affection from yourself? Would that U.S. state you yourself admire for being the "most British" of all U.S. states, be Massachusetts, Virginia, New Hampshire, Maine, South Carolina, Utah, Connecticut, Vermont, Maryland, or some other U.S. state?

---Your Majesty, is there any particular American citizen currently residing in the United States, whom you believe would be even more impressive, and more culturally influential and successful in The United Kingdom, if he or she were to emigrate to The United Kingdom and become a British citizen.

---Of all the cultural and societal innovations and scientific inventions that originated in the United States of America at any time during your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom, which innovations have impressed you the most or pleased you the most?

---Of all the nations of the world that you fear the most or that you regard as the most sinister threat to The United Kingdom, which one nation gives you the most nightmares, so to speak? Would that nation be Russia, China, North Korea, or some other nation?

---Your Majesty, do you believe that a World War III can be averted throughout the remainder of the 21st Century? I was reminded to ask you this question because, as you may recall from your youth, a published essay from the year 1938, one year before World War II erupted, by the English author Virginia Woolf attempted to respond to the question of whether World War II could be averted, and expressed Miss Woolf's high hopes for peace.

--Have you been impressed by the U.S. Government's and American society's response to the Global Warming effect?

--As the official Head of State for The United Kingdom, do you subscribe to the view that any British citizen's failure to participate in the recycling of trash items such as paper or plastics, for instance, is a form of child abuse and intergenerational abuse in which current and future younger generations of Britons are being deprived of access to valuable resources they will need in order to enjoy a high quality of life.

--Do you believe that The United Kingdom does a better job than The United States of America at promoting nationwide participation in the recycling of trash items containing glass, paper, plastics, aluminum, and other recyclable items? Have you discussed your concerns about American society's level of participation in recycling with your British Prime Minister or with any representative for The United States?

---Your Majesty, do you subscribe to the view that the metric system that has been embraced by The United Kingdom conserves fossil fuels and for that and other reasons is safer for the global environment and better for world trade than is the traditional English system of measurements still being used in the United States? Do you feel at all irked or frustrated or exasperated with or dismayed by American society for failing to fully and comprehensively convert to the metric system during the 20th Century?

--When you observe American heads of state, does it strike you as somewhat cruel toward modern American Presidents that each of them appears to age by 10 to 20 years while serving in elective office for only four to 8 years?

---Do you regard it as sadistic or cruel on the part of American society and the American system of government that U.S. Presidents in modern times are burdened with so much power and responsibility, including as an expected fund-raiser for their political party during their term of office and as an expected participant at numerous official ceremonial events, along with flagrantly inordinate time demands? I am reminded as I pose this question to you of the graying of the hair that occurs quite dramatically in virtually every President of the United States over the course of his term of office.

---Your Majesty, is there any other context in which you regard American society as being sadistic or cruel or injurious, and in which you feel confident that your own European nation of Great Britain in the same or in a comparable context would not be sadistic or cruel or injurious.

---As you know, Your Majesty, most Americans take pride in declaring that American society is more democratic than British society is. It occurred to me today, though, that a low-income or poverty-stricken person in Great Britain who has a need for medical care is assured by your government of receiving adequate medical care. In the United States, by contrast, no such assurance of adequate medical care for low-income persons exists. From that standpoint, in particular, do you regard Great Britain as being far kinder and more generous toward low-income persons and poverty-stricken persons than is the United States?

--We have all heard about deplorably injurious noise pollution in modern times. Do you believe that the legal system throughout the entire British Commonwealth adequately deters individuals from deliberately and willfully generating noise pollution that is then deliberately and willfully over a prolonged period of time inflicted on an individual who does not want that noise pollution.

--Do you believe that noise pollution should ever be permitted by the British Government in any context that is designed to punish someone or or assault someone for having political or religious beliefs or observably civil conduct that some group of individuals or entity in Great Britain disapproves of.

--Have you ever known of any American citizen of British ancestry whom You yourself believed was being persecuted in the United States? Has the British Government ever on its own volition offered political or religious asylum to an American citizen of British ancestry whom the British Government determined to have been victimized by political or religious persecution inside the United States.

--Do you believe that the British Government currently has a better record on human rights issues---in regard to honoring a law-abiding individual's privacy rights and to honoring a law-abiding individual's right to set his own priorities in his own life, for instance---than does the United States?

---Your Majesty, during your reign have you ever once been informed about a noteworthy lawsuit that had been filed by The United Kingdom in international court against The United States of America? If so, did you personally approve of that lawsuit pitting your country against The United States of America?

---When you reflect on all about Russian society that might elicit a wince of disapproval from yourself, would the Russian government's contempt for and defiance of the privacy rights of individual Russian citizens rank near the top of that list?

--Do you believe that Great Britain has a better record than the United States at protecting the full freedom of citizens of your own country from their ever being victimized by stalking.

---Your Majesty, in your role as Head of the Anglican Church and Chief of State of The United Kingdom, are you greatly dismayed by the so-called "arranged marriages" that occur, including in self-described democracies such as the United States, in which a youthful adult individual who definitely does NOT want to be married to or to reside with or room with a cited older person, is nonethless pressured extensively or blackmailed or compelled into that very deplorable and injurious defacto form of slavery known as an "arranged marriage."

--Your Majesty, would it pose a concern to you if you were to learn that a British citizen or an American citizen of British ancestry had been subjected involuntarily and against his will to continuous and year-round anonymous verbalized communications or noise pollution on a year-round and multi-year basis that were determined by an ear, nose, and throat medical specialist, to be permanently injurious to the medical health of that American citizen of British ancestry?

---Your Majesty, in your role as the Head of the Anglican Church, would you yourself ever refuse to participate in any inter-denominational event or inter-denominational program or ecumenical service in which a religious denomination OTHER than your own Anglican Church, had sought to participate despite that other denomination having a documented history of subjecting you or one or more of the members of your Anglican Church to repeated and frequent anonymous or knowingly fraudulent, dishonest communications.

---Your Majesty, in your role as Head of the Anglican Church and as the official Chief of State of The United Kingdom, do you believe that consistency of tactful honesty and obedience of the law by yourself serves as one of the most effective means of promoting tactful honesty and obedience of the law by each of your subjects?

---In your own admirable devotion to diplomatic honesty and the finest of credibility in all of your communications with Parliament and the news media and general public, do you occasionally issue retraction press releases tactfully and politely explaining that you had somehow misspoken yourself in a previous public statement? If so, do you feel that those retraction or correction press releases help to encourage all of your citizenry to promptly acknowledge and promptly correct noteworthy factual errors, and especially all deliberately fraudulent statements they have made, in previous statements they have verbalized or written?

-----Your Majesty, your relationship with media companies through the decades has intrigued many of your observers. During your entire reign as Queen of The United Kingdom, has there been any media company you regard as unethical that has so offended you that you've chosen to impose a permanent Royal Ban on that media company and any and all of its employees ever being granted the opportunity to attend any public event that you might ever agree to yourself preside over? Which media company or media companies, if any, incurred that Royal Ban from yourself, and have each of those media companies fully honored any such punishment of themselves that you had imposed on your own behalf?

---Your Majesty, in your role as a Christian leader and Head of the Anglican Church, do you personally believe that you have directly pursued actions at any time that spared at least one subject of yours from "Going to Hell" in his or her expected afterlife? Do you recall the name of any such individual who is no longer living, and whose expected afterlife, you are yourself completely certain, was in fact changed to Heaven, when before your role in his life, his afterlife status would have most certainly been Hell for that British citizen, in your view.

---Your Majesty, do you regard yourself as a woman possessing supernatural powers, a bit like a goddess or benevolent witch. Do you recall any particular moment or incident in your life that prompted you to conclude that you possibly had magical or supernatural powers, such as the great power to magically heal a terminally ill or dying person?

--Your Majesty, the injurious and enraging indignity that occurs to a human being from anonymous communications inflicted on oneself that invade one's privacy rights, is very much on the minds of many Europeans and Americans these days. In your own life, have you ever once agreed to be or remain the personal friend or a business associate of any individual who had himself or herself subjected you at any time to anonymous communications intrusive upon your own privacy rights?

--Your Majesty, have you ever had any occasion to yourself directly contact the President of the United States, the Attorney General of the United States, or the Secretary of State of the United States Government, and to yourself directly express concern about, or your own indignation concerning, what you regarded as flagrantly improper conduct by a government-sponsored or government-owned institution or agency or business entity or media company or individual operating inside the United States of America?

--Your Majesty, do you agree with the surprising statement made to me on the telephone in 1989 or early 1990 by an official of the British Embassy office in Houston, Texas, at that time, this during a long-distance phone call I made to that British embassy office in Houston from my private rental-apartment residence in Big Spring, Texas, that "even if you (John Kevin McMillan) were to visit Great Britain, the voices (sic) would only continue there. So your visiting Great Britain would not do any good for you." This, I might add, is an approximate quote of what one of your British Embassy officials in Houston stated to me in late 1989 or early 1990. The word 'voices', however, is an exact verbatim quote of a word that British Embassy official used in his comments to myself on the telephone that day in 1989 or 1990. Then in 1990 or 1991, a female American citizen residing in the eastern region of the United States surprised me by stating to me on the telephone, during a long-distance phone call I made to her private residence from my rental apartment in Sweetwater, Texas, that if I myself were to someday visit Great Britain, "I'm (that female U.S. citizen speaking to me) sure that the British people would be interested in hearing the voices (exact quote on that last word)." I should politely emphasize, Your Majesty, that I myself have never learned the art of pantemime, and I almost never raise my voice. Do you have any response to either of those two unexpected comments on the telephone relating to Great Britain that were verbalized to me many years ago by a British Embassy official in Houston, Texas, and by a female U.S. citizen residing in an eastern U.S. state?

---If you could change one aspect of American society or the governmental policies found in the United States, what would you change?

---Your Majesty, many of your subjects criticize Americans for being "too crude and vulgar." As a response to that, would you be willing to cite an example of an elegant and non-vulgar and sophisticated American citizen whom you yourself particularly admire?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have heard the widely-heard complaint about Americans that a shockingly high percentage of them are sadistic and violent toward other human beings. It must be a source of great pride to you to sense that the per-capita incidence of empirically observable sadistic torture of others and physically observable violence in Great Britain is significantly lower than in the United States. I must ask you, though, whether you yourself ever sense that the plutocratic orientation of many of the affluent British people frequently translates into a tendency on their part to regard middle-income and low-income persons---the "lower classes," as you British people generally call them---as servants and quasi-servants and subhuman creatures of no consequence who can be toyed with and exploited by the upper classes on a continual and year-round basis.

---Your Majesty, what would your own personal response be to those plutocratic Britons who say that they have no respect for, and considerable contempt and antipathy toward, lower-income persons in your country?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have heard the frequent criticism of Americans that they tend to be far more materialistic than British citizens, for instance. Do you agree with this description of Americans? I raise this question partly because, as I'm sure you must be painfully aware, the American news media appears to delight at each opportunity it gets to publicize your own financial wealth and property wealth. In fact, the American news media often appear to be intent on depicting the reigning monarch of Great Britain as the very embodiment of the theme of materialism. My follow-up question, then, is to simply ask you if you believe you have been unfairly described by the American news media as 'materialistic', and I use that word, 'materialistic,' with quotation marks around it.

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you are aware that many creatively talented American citizens dwell in poverty, sometimes in a context of their being subjected to religious or political persecution. Are you yourself familiar with any current case of a law-abiding American citizen dwelling in poverty at present, whom you believe to have been victimized by religious or political persecution that you yourself deplore.

---Is there any American media company that offends you as much as the Fleet Street media companies that are notorious for their allegedly reckless style of journalism?

---Your Majesty, if you were to learn that an American citizen or British citizen was himself being subjected over a prolonged time period to verbalized anonymous or fraudulent, deliberately inaccurate, verbalized communications by a cited "employer" of that individual, would you regard it as wise and prudent on the part of that same individual to lawfully and in a civil manner terminate his relationship with that employer---regardless of who or what that so-called employer might have been.

---Your Majesty, many Americans tend to look upon the very popularity of the Fleet Street tabloids as implying that English people love to gossip on a daily and year-round basis. Do you regard that American impression as inaccurate and unfair? Also, how would you yourself distinguish between gossip that you yourself regard as injurious or irresponsible, and, on the other hand, inoffensive candid conversations between two British citizens in which they are generously sharing factual information and ideas and impressions with each other.

---Your Majesty, do you sometimes sense that the Fleet Street tabloids convey the reassuring message to millions of British citizens that "even our most prominent citizens of The United Kingdom are not, after all, leading completely scandal-free lives. So it seems that all of us Britons of every conceivable socioeconomic status have some juicy scandal from our past or present that could be blush-inducing for us if we read about it in the tabloids! What a fine consolation that is for me!" Is it possible, then, that the Fleet Street tabloids serve as a form of mild revenge on life for millions of commoners, if you will, who are mindful of having themselves led scandal-plagued lives, with those commoners then declaring to their friends and relatives, "So you see, he's no better a British citizen than I am, since he spent British Government money on adventures with prostitutes, for God's sake!"

---Your Majesty, the ubiquitous presence of cellular phones in modern British life raises an inevitable question. Do you ever worry that the widespread popularity of cellphones in England today will spawn an increase in reckless gossiping and endless loquacity on the part of millions of English citizens? If so, do you sometimes worry that cellular phones are significantly undermining the character and moral fiber of the people of 21st Century England?

----Your Majesty, do you mind if I ask you to describe your own personal experiences with cell phones. Have you ever spoken into a cellular phone, and do you recall what that was like for you?

---Your Majesty, many observers of "The London Times" predicted a sharp decline in its quality and integrity after Australian media magnate Rupert Murdoch purchased that prestigious daily newspaper. How would you yourself compare "The London Times" of today with "The London Times" five years before Rupert Murdoch purchased it.

---Your Majesty, based on your own in-person meetings and correspondence with media magnate Rupert Murdoch of Australia, what is your own impression of him as a human being and as a businessman?

---Your Majesty, have you ever worried that the acquisition of "The London Times" by a billionaire citizen of Australia, Mr. Murdoch, was part of a broader Australian corporate and cultural invasion and financial penetration of Great Britain? Is there, in fact, any evidence of an Australianifiction of Great Britain occurring at present? If so, do you ever suspect that many Australians in their financial and cultural penetration of the British economy reveal that they have an ax to grind against England? I raise this question because England, as you must be very aware, was the very nation that shipped thousands of British citizens in debt to the Down Under Continent which served as a geographical counterpart to a debtor's prison.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that the British Government and British society should do more to prevent or deter deliberately-fraudulent communications or journalistic reportage than does the U.S. Government and American society? Would you be willing to please elaborate on that?

--Your Majesty, in your official role as the head of the Church of England, are you ever inclined to write and deliver a public religion-minded speech or sermon about British society of today that's comparable to the 1970s televised Presidential Speech by U.S. President Jimmy Carter ---a Presidential speech in the USA that U.S. Senator Edward Kennedy later described as the 'societal malaise' speech. That speech by President Carter, as you may recall, deplored societal decadence in American society of the latter 1970s.

---I'm sure you must be very aware that American society has been criticized by some for failing to fully honor the legal right of law-abiding and honorable persons such as myself, for instance, to lawfully and permanently exclude from their (or my) own life each of the persons whom they (or I) have already rejected. One attorney whom I myself consulted about this matter in Austin, Texas, himself a kindly Christian gentleman of British ancestry named John F. Campbell, even went so far as to write and sign a May 10, 1999, legal letter on my behalf on the legal stationery of his Campbell & Morgan law firm in Austin, Texas, in which attorney John F. Campbell, a member of the State Bar of Texas, chose to politely emphasize that "I, John F. Campbell, Attorney, can state unequivocally that the State Government of Texas has never informed me or my Law Firm that the State fails in any way to honor John K. McMillan's asserted right to exclude various specified individuals from his own life and to enjoy a life for himself, in which he never again has to hear those rejected persons' names."
Do you believe that British society and the British legal system are more respectful than the American legal system is toward the asserted legal rights of individuals such as myself to exclude from their own life persons whom they themselves have, in fact, rejected.

--Does it pose a major concern to you that many of the British citizens and citizens of foreign nations who purchase the gin and whiskey produced commercially in Great Britain will themselves become addicted to that gin or whiskey? Do you believe the British Government should do more than it currently does to help prevent addiction to hard liquor?

--Your Majesty, is there any context in which you would support a one-glass-of-alcohol limit per 24-hour period by each and every customer inside a pub in England? I raise this question based on the likelihood that statistics on crime in your nation can be correlated to inebration from alcohol or hard liquior inside Great Britain.

---Your Majesty, I would like to respectfully point out that whenever a citizen of Great Britain or a visitor to Great Britain enters a restaurant and orders a bottle of wine with his or her meal, that customer is very likely to become intoxicated over the course of his meal. Would you advocate any limit on the sale and consumption inside a restuarant of an entire bottle of wine on the part of a customer and any other members of his party who are seated with him at the same dining table?

---Your Majesty, we have all heard the very shocking news accounts about political leaders in your country who have been linked to sex crimes, many of them alcohol-related, while holding a major position of leadership in the government. Do you yourself sometimes wish that each and every one of your nation's government officials and political leaders would each sign a formal pledge vowing to themselves permanently abstain from any consumption of alcohol on any occasion at any time during their entire period of employment by the British Government? Or do you believe that a future scenario of an alcohol-free and teetotaling Parliament, an alcohol-free and teetotaling Cabinet, and an alcohol-free and teetotaling Prime Minister, would significantly reduce the number of sex crimes and other crimes committed by government officials in your great European nation?

--Are any of your personal friends in 2009 complete and permanent teetotalers who do not consume any alcohol or liquor at all. Do you sometimes sense that your teetotaling friends are underestimated by the news media because those non-drinkers are less likely to lead "colorfully deranged" and "outrageously intriguing" and "photogenically reckless" lifestyles that might appeal to the Fleet Street media companies, for instance..

---Your Majesty, do you ever get the impression that "moral and aesthetic straightness," so to speak, is being mocked as "square" or "passee" or "old-fashioned" or "antiquted," and is also being widely ridiculed in a shameless and unjustifiable manner in modern society, whether that be in Great Britain or The United States or some other nation, such as Canada.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that professional chauffeurs in Great Britain should be required to lead alcohol-free lifestyles on a permanent and year-round basis? Or would it be fair and legal for a British citizen employing a chauffeur to require that that chauffeur completely and permanently abstain from alcohol, both on the job and away from the job. I was reminded to raise these questions, as you must be painfully aware, because of the great tragedy that struck your entire nation in a recent prior decade when an inebriated chauffeur operating in France was permitted to drive a limousine near Paris in which Princess Diana was riding as a passenger. It seems likely that a nationwide ban on any and all consumption of alcohol by professional chauffeurs would protect the safety of all passengers, and of those chauffeurs.

---One of the most popular television shows in Great Britain these days is called "Britain's Got Talent." It is a show, as I'm sure you are aware, Your Majesty, in which Britons' skill at singing, musical performance, and dancing is being highlighted. As Head of State of the United Kingdom, do you feel a bit awkward about the premise of that television show that skill at oratory, as Sir Winston Churchill once had, or skill at essay-writing, as George Orwell once had, or skill at diplomacy or skill at cooking or knitting or creative brainstorming, for that matter, are somehow inconsequential? Would you like to see some alternative show develop that exclusively highlights wholesome and creative skills other than singing or music-making per se?

---Your Majesty, one of the recent very sobering messages from the "Britain's Got Talent" television show is that a kind and polite single adult British woman who sings beautifully, Miss Susan Boyles, might have been subjected to a rather spartan "Miss Lonelyhearts" lifestyle throughout nearly all of her adult life. Do you believe that British society should do more than it currently does to protect the legal right of all British citizens to feel the full freedom to enjoy a full social life, provided that any such freedom for each such British citizen would strictly feature strictly-mutual-consent social partners, and possibly even a strictly-mutual-consent romantic partner as well, for that British citizen.

---Your Majesty, would you be willing at this time to mention the name of the cultural or political leaders of today's Great Britain who you believe to be the strongest or best orators in 21st Century Great Britain?

---Of all the questions that have been posed to you at any time during your multi-decade tenure as the regining monarch of The United Kingdom, which question or questions have you felt to be the most creative, inspirational, thought-provoking, or helpful for yourself or for your country?

---Of all the questions that you yourself ever at any time during your reign posed to anyone, including any Prime Minister or other government official or any royal family or individual anywhere in the world, which question or questions that you yourself posed on your own initiative were the questions or inquiries that you feel were the very best and most fruitful or helpful of your entire reign as the Queen of England?

--Your Majesty, how would you respond to those observers of The United Kingdom who might state that in their opinion, foreign nations such as Japan, Sweden, Frace, Germany, or The United States have greater success than Great Britain at inviting and eliciting and rewarding creative brainstorming ideas by employees at workplaces and members of the general public and by government employees, for that matter, that are aimed at improving working conditions, improving the caliber of private-sector and public-sector services, and improving the overall quality of life for many or all citizens of that nation.

--Your Majesty, do you believe that your Royal Family in The United Kingdom is more successful than any other ruling Royal Family in the world at inviting and eliciting creative and innovative brainstorming ideas from your staff members and from members of the general public throughout your nation. For instance, it's likely that your Royal Family has already elicited the suggestion from one of your subjects that a historic castle in your country could possibly be renovated and converted into either an attractively-developed condominium complex featuring dozens of separate condo units within that castle, or into a picturesque and historic hotel that would appeal to many tourists visiting your great European nation.

--Your Majesty, you are no doubt very proud of the great love of architecture by your world-famous son, Prince Charles. Would you like to see an architecture instruction program or architecture research institute in Great Britain being named after your beloved son? Also, would you like to see a new building constructed that was actually designed by your son, Prince Charles?

---As for your own legacy, Your Majesty, have you ever considered lending support for the proposed establishment of a Queen Elizabeth II Centre for the Performing Arts somewhere in Great Britain? I am referring to the type of peforming arts center that commands the type of global prestige and admiration that the Kennedy Center for the Peforming Arts in Washington, D.C., often does.

---Your Majesty, the emergence of many American-style "billionaires" in modern world history has brought with it a change in how we view rich people. Do you find as Queen of England that the vast majority of all billionaires residing in The United Kingdsom of today tend to be less willing to accept the legal authority of the British Government than do rich people of lesser affluence? Have you also sensed that Billionaires as a class of people tend to be less sociable and less civic-minded than you would want them to be?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure that many of your admirers would be curious to find out which items you chose to place in any Royal Time Capsule that you have contributed toward. Or perhaps I should phrase the question a bit differently. If you were to contribute at some future date to a Royal Time Capsule, which items and memorabilia would you yourself choose to include in that Royal Time Capsule on behalf of the Royal Family and The United Kingdom?

---Your Majesty, is there any one person anywhere in the world whom you would like to invite to meet with you at Buckingham Palace or Windsor Castle, but you are currently somehow denied the opportunity to do so, or you are discouraged or prohibited by others from inviting that individual to meet with you inside Buckingham Palace or Windsor Castle? Do you feel any resentment toward the individual or group of individuals or government entity or business entity that has somehow prevented you from inviting that one person to meet with you in person in England or some other nation of the British Commonwealth nation

---Your Majesty, your country was famous in earlier era partly because The United Kingdom "ruled the waves," as I believe one often-repeated song or chant once put it. Today, when you reflect on the many seamen citizens your island nation, do you believe that your country confers lofty enough socioeconomic status upon British citizens pursuing careers as captains or crew members of ships? Would you like to see your nation's Parliament confer an annual "British Seaman of the Year" award and accompanying financial prize upon a British citizen?

---Your Majesty, stories abound about eccentric American billionaires and millionaires who habitually dress up as tramps in order to discover who treats them with decency and generosity under those circumstances. The stories generally conclude with that wealthy American in disguise then surprising those who befriend him by handing them a cash prize of $10,000 or more. Your Majesty, have you ever done anything like that, in which you wore a disguise and posed as a commoner in your country? If so, were you surprised by how the people of your country treated you when they regarded you as being a commoner of very modest financial means?

--Your Majesty, do you believe that any and all British citizens who are financially affluent should feel honorbound to help foster socioeconomic upward mobility in at least one currently-low-income British citizen who is clasified as a commoner? Of the wealthy British citizens whom you can recall having met in the last 10 or 20 years, say, which gentleman or lady stands out as having been the most generous and the most helpful in promoting and facilitating upward mobility on the part of lower-income British persons?

---Your Majesty, as you know, American society takes particular pride in what we refer to in the United States as being "rags to riches" stories about upwardly mobile Americans. If you were asked to cite a "rags to riches" American citizen whom you either became acquainted with or read or heard about at any time during your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom, which previously-low-income American citizen most impressed you as deserving his or her great financial success?

---Of the various "rags to riches" stories involving an individual who resided in The United Kingdom at the time, do you recall which individual impressed you the most as richly deserving of his or her great financial success?

---Your Majesty, do you recall any "riches to rags" stories relating to individuals that occurred at any time during your reign as Queen, whether involving individual British citizens or individual citizens of a foreign nation, that you were saddened and dismayed by the most?

---Your Majesty, if you were to learn of a British subject who earns only a minimal financial income, and who says that she is determined to dress fashionably since you as Queen of The United Kingdom have inspired her to emulate you that way, what advice would you offer that lady? Do you believe it is possible for a female low-income British citizen with meager earnings to dress fashionably on a year-round basis?

---Your Majesty, in view of the fact that it is either raining or snowing in your country for many days of each year, and many of the umbrellas on sale in retail stores are dark-colored and somber in appearance, do you advocate the purchase of cheerfully-colored umbrellas that British citizens who are outdoors could open up and hold above their head during a period of rainfall or snowfall? Might that visually appealing alternative to black or dark-brown umbrellas help to keep the citizens of Great Britain feeling cheerful during periods of inclement weather?

---Your Majesty, do you regard it as proper and prudent for a British citizen who is walking in the outdoors during a snowstorm to open up an umbrella in order to protect himself or herself against any risk of his or her being pelted with snow?

----Your Majesty, are you satisfied with the current number and availability and quality of used-clothing stores offering inexpensive clothes for sale to all residents of England, Wales, Scotland, and Northern Ireland? I raise this question because some have observed that used-clothing stores in the United States, for instance, are the only opportunity that many poverty-stricken persons have to shake hands---however indirectly, and however figuratively----with the affluent person or well-to-do family who generously donated used clothing from their or her own wardrobe to that used clothing store.

---Your Majesty, inevitably one wonders how you as Queen of The United Kingdom are expected by your subjects to yourself eat Fish and Chips? Is it considered proper Royal Form and proper Royal Etiquette for you as Queen of The United Kingdom to use a fork and knife at all times whenever you yourself partake of Fish and Chips for lunch or dinner?

---Your Majesty, you must be very mindful at all times of your being perhaps the leading definer of etiquette and manners for all British citizens. Do you recall any particular example of a guideline for etiquette or manners that you promulgated or exemplified during your tenure as Queen, and that you are especially proud of?

---Your Majesty, one etiquette qustion that's no doubt arisen in your country relates to conduct by two British citizens dining together inside a restaurant. When two British persons are having a meal and conversation together inside a restaurant in your country, and one of those two persons receives a phone call on his cellular phone, do you yourself regard it as bad manners for that British citizen to answer his cell phone and converse with the caller in that context?

---Your Majesty, are there any types of protocol or etiquette tradition in your own country that you yourself regard as stifling and unncessary, and possibly even injurious to your country and its citizenry?

---Your Majesty, one of the most famous rituals of British life that appears to baffle many Americans is the "Changing of the Guard" ceremony in front of Buckingham Palace in London. It is likely, in fact, that an American citizen might comment to you that "this is merely a change in work crews, one workshift ending and another workshift beginning immediately after that." How would you respond to that evaluation of the "Changing of the Guard" ceremony by that American citizen? Is there something poetic, a philosophically deeper meaning, to the "Changing of the Guard" ceremony about which you yourself are aware, but that most Americans seem to not understand or grasp.

---Your Majesty, you have presided over many thousands of professional tour guides giving guided tours and walking tours of London to visitors from foreign countries and outlying regions of Great Britain. Has any particular professional tour guide in London impressed you the most in the period since you assumed the throne in 1952? Do you recall what made that professional tour guide particularly memorable and impressive for you?

---Your Majesty, it must be quite a source of pride to you to sense that you are the most extensively photographed monarch in all of British history thus far. The number of photographs of yourself that have been taken by professional as well as amateur photographers must total many thousands, at this point. Your Majesty, is there any scenario during your remaining years as Queen in which you would consider permitting any of your subjects to establish a "Queen Elizabeth II" historical museum in your honor that features thousands of photographs of yourself at various periods of your life, with an emphasis on the period of your reign as Queen of The United Kingdom.

--Your Majesty, have you ever considered authorizing the compilation and publication of a new wall calendar of Great Britain and The United Kingdom that might be entitled, "Queen Elizabeth II's United Kingdom," with each month of that calendar possibly offering a photograph of each of your own favorite places in the various geographical areas throughout your great European nation.

---Your Majesty, do you believe that the British Government has done enough to sponsor and help finance the development of an extensive series of "British Talking Books," or audiotapes containing the narratives of published works of writing in your country. I raise this question because it's likely that many of the senior citizens of The United Kingdom currently suffer from visual impairment and would appreciate the option of "reading books" by listening to audiotapes of books.

----Your Majesty, is there any current tradition in Great Britain that you would like to see ended immediately? If so, have you considered asking your Prime Minister to recommend that Parliament approve a new law that immediately terminates or outlaws that particular tradition in your country.

----Your Majesty, I read in the 21t Century that an American actress, Cameron Diaz, was reportedly "banned from Great Britain." Despite this, I don't recall having read about any incident that would have triggered a ban of that type on Cameron Diaz. If there was, in fact, an attempt to discourage or prevent Cameron Diaz from ever again visiting England, Scotland, Wales, or Nothern Ireland, did you feel comfortable with that British ban on Cameron Diaz?

---Your Majesty, is Cameron Diaz the only famous American citizen you can recall who has reportedly been "banned from Britain" at any time during your tenure as Queen of The United Kingdom.

---Your Majesty, would you be willing to mention at this time which trip to The United States thus far has proved to be the trip that you enjoyed the most?

---Your Majesty, many observers of Prince William have observed that he has considerable anger---almost to the point of bitterness---toward anyone who criticizes his late mother, Princess Diana, and toward anyone who provides fatual information about Princess Diana that Prince William regards as unflattering to herself. If Prince William were to someday assume the throne as King of The United Kingdom, do you yourself worry that William's anger toward critics and detractors of his beloved mother might possibly undermine William's ability to rule your country in a consistently kind and gentlemanly and conscientious and statesmanlike manner?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you must be very aware that one of the conscientious legacies of Princess Diana was her strong support for addressing the AIDS crisis. On behalf of that noble goal, would you like to see the British Government do more in the way of filing criminal-charges and pursuing criminal-law prosecutions in a court of law in Great Britain against any and all HIV-infected gay persons and against any and all HIV-positive homosexual persons and against any and all HIV-positive bisexual persons and all other HIV-infected persons in your country as well, who, in each such case --- whether deliberately or through negligence on their part ---- allegedly infected another person with the often-fatal HIV virus? Wouldn't those criminal-law prosecutions and accompanying incarcerations of hundreds or thousands of HIV-positive persons each year in Great Britain, help to solve the AIDS crisis in your country, and in a very idealistic manner thereby honor the anti-AIDS legacy of Princess Diana?

---With all due respect toward Princess Diana and her own widely-publicized special affinity for the gay community, do you support the legal right of a law-abiding, morally and aesthetically straight, observably masculine, hygienic, non-alcoholic, tobacco-free and non-smoking, facially cleanshaven British citizen (or an American citizen fitting that description, for that matter) to himself or herself lead a law-abiding lifestyle in which that individual exhibits a pro-masculine-male and lawful form of "heterophilia," as it might be called, featuring a polite expression of greater overall affinity toward a significantly higher percentage of all facially cleanshaven and masculine heterosexual adult men and all heterosexual adult women, in particular, than of all homosexual adult male persons, all gay adult male persons, all bisexual adult male persons, all lesbian adult persons, all transvestite adult persons, all transsexual adult persons, all facially hairy adult male persons, or all effeminate male adult persons of any any sexual identity per se.

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you are aware that tolerance toward human diversity is advocated virtually every day in your country and in the United States. However popular that tolerance theme may be these days, does it personally offend you or alarm you yourself, as Queen of The United Kingdom, if a person who never consumes marijuana or any other illicit drug chooses to himself associate exclusively or almost exclusively with persons who never consume marijuana or any other illicit drug; or, for that matter, if a masculine gentleman with good voice modulation and vocal intonation generally feels comfortable associating in his non-romantic life with other masculine gentlemen who exhibit good voice modulation and vocal intonation. Isn't there, in other words, a natural basis for a Freedom of Speech-related and Freedom of Religion-related and Freedom of Association-related human affiliation with others that's based on tangible agreement with them about major moral and religious and aesthetic and locutional values of that type?

---Your Majesty, have you yourself concluded that the percentage of all medical doctors in Great Britain who are quacks providing fraudulent medical services to their patients or clients, is lower or higher than the comparable percentage for medical doctors in the United States?

---Your Majesty, I'm sure you have heard many tragic and poignant stories about the emotional and medical and financial damage done to, and the morally compromising effects on, non-alcoholic, non-smoking, non-addicted, and law-abiding British persons---or Americans fitting that description, for that matter---that has been inflicted on them by persons who are either alcoholics or drug addicts or chain smokers, even to the point of those honorable persons being at risk of being charged in a court of law of complicity with law-breaking and criminal conduct by their drug-addicted or alcohol-addicted or tobacco-addicted aquaintances or friends. As Head of the Anglican Church and as the ruling Queen of The United Kingdom, do you feel comfortable with the decision by many honorable British citizens---or by some honorable American citizens such as myself, for that matter---to generally only agree to be mutual-consent personal friends or professional associates with persons who are not currently addicted to either alcohol or illicit drugs, and who are not currently chain smokers.

----Your Majesty, I'm sure it must cross your mind on occasion that you are the world's most famous non-smoker, and that you have apparently held that admirable status ever since 1952. If you could, would you like to help promote the non-smokers' rights groups that are based in your country? I raise this question because in the United States, for instance, the non-smokers' rights cause is being embraced by millions of Americans these days.

---Of the various territories and geographical areas that are included in The United Kingdom, does any particular province or state, whether that be the British Bahamas or Northern Ireland, for instance, appear to be lagging behind England in regard to comprehensive protection of the legal and moral rights of non-smokers?

--Your Majesty, many people look upon you as the leading arbiter of good manners and platonic politeness and privacy rights concerns for your country. In that role, do you believe that a citizen of Great Britain--or of the United States, for that matter---who during an in-person meeting with someone toward whom the former individual definitely does not wish to have any romantic or carnal or sexual relations or any physical contact beyond a handshake, if that much, is himself or herself subjected by the latter individual to an unwanted pinch or unwanted caress or an unwanted embrace or any unwanted physical contact aside from a polite handshake, would himself or herself be fair and reasonable in choosing not to have any further involvement with the latter individual----regardless of whether the latter individual claims that "it's my Italian heritage that makes me so physical with everyone, since we Italians are a very passionate people, you see!" or "it's just my gay style as a gay person to grab and pinch and hug new acquaintances during first-time meetings with them, since this gives me a chance to then quickly escalate the physicality into a clever quickie before the other individual has a chance to say no to my unzipping his pants and seizing that opportunity for a conquest via my tongue that adds to my very detailed Black Book entries for that 24-hour period; but of course, I should also note that we gays tend to be very physically expressive in general, I think it's something in our genes, a bit like the Italians and their passionate style with everyone! It seems that we gays, and this is why we gays are all are so very similar to the Italians, can never keep our hands to ourselves!"

---Your Majesty, the great tradition of respect for Freedom of Speech that is fostered in your country also, in more recent years, has featured fuller respect for Freedom of Religion in a nation with an official state religion. If I were to mention to you at this time that I myself have established a new and politely non-Christian, non-proselytizing religion of my own with very stringent membership eligibility requirements---mine being an illicit-drug-free, tobacco-free, and alcohol-free, civil and law-abiding religion for honorable human beings with no felony-conviction record that forbids its members from participation in anonymous or fraudulent communications and pranksterism --- would you feel at all offended by that disclosure from myself?

---Your Majesty, it often seems that "tolerance toward all" is one of the leading credos of the younger generations of today. Yet if you consider a hypothetical scenario in which a British subject of yours as a customer inside a restaurant, for instance, is served a beverage or dish he's ordered there that was either poisoned or otherwise contaminated deliberately by the waitperson of that British citizen customer, wouldn't you agree, Your Majesty, that it would be self-defeating and perversely self-annihilative, even, for a customer in that scenario to declare with "Be of Good Cheer" pride in his voice, "I'm very tolerant toward any and all pranks and any and all contaminations of my food or beverage that my male waiter might deliberately choose to inflict on me. It's all part of human diversity, you see, that my waiter on any given night might prove to be a devious prankster, or someone exhibiting sly criminal intent toward me."

----Your Majesty, do you believe that all single men and all single women in Great Britain as a matter of conscience should be routinely tested for the HIV virus and the gamut of sexually transmitted diseases every six months, even if they themselves have no medical symptoms, with those commendably conscientious British citizens then routinely every six months obtaining a reliable copy of their most recent and fully-up-to-date medical test results, citing their own legal name and actual birthdate, that they could then present to any propective or actual dating partner, and, if they wish, to their employer for inclusion in their own personnel file in the event of a scenario in which that employee might ever fall unconscious at the workplace and need cardiopulmonary resuscitation, for instance.

---Your Majesty, one of the most famous traditional sayings in the United States, and possibly in your country as well, is that "A man's home is his castle." That saying implies, though, that the wife in that household is a commoner who is always governed by the rule of the reigning King in that home. Do you often sense that even today in modern 21st Century Great Britain, many British married men choose not to treat their wife like a Queen---or, at the very least, like a Princess? Does this pose a concern to you?

---One follow-up question, Your Majesty: Have you ever been told by a lady friend of yours that her husband or boyfriend had facial hair that scratched your female friend's face whenever he kissed or embraced your lady friend----so much so that your lady friend complained to you that "it feels every bit as abusive and severe as a hickie, whenever he kisses me or hugs me, because of that dreadful mustache or beard of his that inflicts severe pain and abrasions on my face. What should be love-making between us becomes, instead, sadomasochistic torture of myself." What was your response to your lady friend? Did you advise her to insist that her boyfriend or husband have his face shaved immediately? Did you advise her that she had a basis for seeking a marital divorce or annulment, if her husband refused to immediately and completely shave his face, since he had inflicted needless pain on your lady friend whenever they hugged and he had thereby forfeited any claim to remaining as her husband, in your possible view.

---Your Majesty, do you agree with those observers, myself among them, who maintain that facial hair in men poses public health issues, since facial hair is unhygienic and has been linked to the spread of germs?

--Your Majesty, when a male subject of yours smiles at you or glances at you in a fondly appreciative manner, do you prefer that he present you with a fully cleanshaven face that reveals the full warmth of his appreciative and friendly facial expression directed at yourself? Do you agree with those who say that a contrasting scenario featuring the presence of facial hair on a gentleman's face, undermines his ability to offer a fully warm and fully appreciative or fully affectionate facial expression, partly because his lip or cheeks or chin are concealed by the facial hair, toward a very honorable and regal lady such as yourself?

---Your Majesty, do you have any suggestions on how a financially vulnerable and youthful single legal-status adult person in Great Britain (or the United States, for that matter) can prevent inter-generational exploitation of himself or herself by an affluent person 10 or more years older in age. I raise this question because I have sensed in Austin, Texas, for instance, that low-income youthful adult persons are often being subjected to unfair and injurious pressure from older persons --- often involving unwanted physical contact and bribery or extortionism or stalking and repeated verbal harassment of and impingements upon the privacy rights of and censoriousness toward and sadomasochistic physical abuse and deliberate torture of an adult younger person by an older person ---- to have sexual or carnal relations with, or to reside with, that older person who was born at least 10 years before the younger person.
Your Majesty, any guidance you are willing to offer to financially vulnerable and youthful adult persons, regardless of their current age, could help to rescue many thousands of adult persons in Great Britain and the United States from unwanted interference in their own life by a repressively domineering and sadistic and slyly manipulative older person---the type of older person, I might add, who is sometimes referred to in the United States as an infamous "Sugar Daddy" figure.

---Your Majesty, would you support the establishment of a special "Intergenerational-Exploitation Prevention Fund" in your country that would be drawn from exclusively to help financially vulnerable legal-status adult younger persons in your country, regardless of whether their current age is 17 or 22 or 52, to themselves achieve financial self-sufficiency that would protect their ability to reject and permanently exclude someone at least 10 years older than themselves in age who sought to compel them or pressure them or bribe them or force them into having a so-called "personal relationship" or a so-called "career" relationship with that adult older person.

--On a more cheerful note, Your Majesty, I must ask you if you have any suggestions about how well-intended middle-aged persons could be more successful than they currently are at developing mutual-consent, mutually-beneficial, platonic personal friendships with a variety of individuals---including, in cases of prior parental consent as well as the child's consent, minors----who are themselves significantly younger in age than those middle-aged persons.

---Your Majesty, if you are told that an adult citizen of The United Kingdom is law-abiding and civil, has no criminal-conviction record, and is also gainfully employed, do you believe there should be a limit on the extent to which the British Government (or, assuming some comparable scenario were occurring today in the United States, any government entity in the United States, for that matter) could rightfully restrict or in any way undermine the full range of freedoms or options in life or opportunities in life enjoyed by that law-abiding adult British citizen (or American citizen)?
I raise this question after recalling very helpful personal advice from my benevolent biological father, Dr. Calvin McMillan, in December of 1990 as he dropped me off at the municipal airport in Austin, Texas. "They can't change you (John Kevin McMillan) that much," Father emphasized to me and helpfully assured me in person that day, without Father specifying to me at that time which government agency or media company or educational institution or religious group or civic group or political organization or individual, for that matter, was Father's point of reference. Your Majesty, I should also politely mention to you at this time that I myself have never once signed any contract with any media company or government-owned entity or private sector enterprise or non-profit group in which I have ever once stated in writing that I myself wanted that media company or entity to "change" me or "alter" me in any way.

---Your Majesty, is there any circumstance you yourself can imagine in which the British Government would itself ever sponsor a program designed to make a civil and law-abiding British citizen with no criminal-conviction record both "anti-sexual" and celibate on a lifelong basis?
Your Majesty, I raise this question after recalling today that in 1989 or 1990, during a period in which I resided in and reported for a Canadian-owned daily newspaper in Big Spring, Texas, I was very surprised to be informed in person by a single adult male resident of Big Spring, Texas--that friendly and self-identified Christian gentleman having been someone with a British last name of "Weaver," he stated to me in person in 1989 or 1990-----that he had heard from others that I myself was being subjected in Big Spring, Texas, during that multi-month time period (this against my own wishes and without my own authorization at any time) to manipulative circumstances sponsored by others that were pervasively violative of my own privacy rights in my own life in that west Texan city, Mr. Weaver politely indicated to me in 1989 or 1990 in that brief and mutually-polite conversation we had. They were manipulative circumstances in my own life, Mr. Weaver emphasized to me on his own volition during that 1989 or 1990 conversation we had in person in Big Spring, that "are designed to make you (John Kevin McMillan of Big Spring, Texas) anti-sexual," that Christian gentleman volunteered to me without ever verbalizing any criticism of myself on his own part during the approximately seven-month period in which I resided in Big Spring, Texas. Mr. Weaver of Big Spring, Texas, made that very surprising disclosure to me during a period of multi-year and year-round celibacy for myself in my own life that I myself never at any time requested or authorized, I wish to politely emphasize.